kelseymhardy Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 I don't feel anything yet. At least I don't feel anything in my body, no changes, no cravings, no pain. What I feel is much more mental and emotion, still recovering from that moment the day before. That moment where you find yourself saying "Enough". I never thought that I would be in this boat again, never in my life. I lost ridiculous amounts of weight on my own, and while I don't resemble that college girl the one who had ballooned to more than 200 pounds, I feel her presence. I feel her as she decides to sneak things, treats that she doesn't enjoy. This self torturing process was how she operated, and I feel her gaining more and more control everyday. She stands in the background of my life, reminding me that I'm not good enough, reminding me that food was once my torturer and yet, my only friend. I hate her, and I hate that she's knocking at my door. So here is to day one, here is to a process that I know will but her deep into the background of my life. I am not sure if she will ever leave, because we all have that reflection of ourselves. But I know that day one is the start of her silence. A least for a little while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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