MamaToJakers

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  1. MamaToJakers

    My Whole9 90 Day Success - It's Not Always All About the Numbers

    Sorry that was my 2yo with my phone!!
  2. MamaToJakers

    Day 11... I want to give up

    Thanks Kaleena.
  3. MamaToJakers

    Day 11... I want to give up

    BTW, I have to add that I came from the Standard American Diet amplified by 1 million, meaning I had terrible eating habits - mostly processed food, dairy, little to no veggies, some fruit, and lots of eating out. So.....that's another reason this has been so hard for me....and another reason that I am trying to remember to be proud of myself for making it this far without cheating. It's a big deal. Even one day at a time is hard....it's more like one moment at a time, one decision at a time. Blah blah blah, sorry to blather on!
  4. MamaToJakers

    Day 11... I want to give up

    Oh boy - thank you, Renee, for posting that link. I had not seen that before, and it left me in tears. I have struggled with the "it is not hard" wording because it sure as heck feels hard to me - sometimes impossible. I'm so thankful for the support from everyone. I am still holding on, on day 12, and trying to wrap my head around all of the things everyone has said. Even if it's not "failure" to quit, it will feel like failure to me, so I need to find a way to work around that. Thanks again, all.
  5. MamaToJakers

    Day 11... I want to give up

    Thanks so much Kirsteen. I do feel better this morning and am going to do my best to tackle the day.
  6. MamaToJakers

    Day 11... I want to give up

    Thanks everyone. I don't even know just I could explain why it's so hard for me other than I am basically going through withdrawal from using food as a drug and it sucks. I've struggled each day with feeling like I'm fighting an internal battle with some sort of demon who's screaming at me to go back to my old ways. It's enormously stressful. I guess I just basically feel like I can't beat that addiction. It's scary, I hate feeling this way. I'm going to bed so I can call Day 11 a day (lol) and see how I feel in the morning. I think psychologically it's hard for me to know that I can't have something I want. Perhaps if I reframe it and say I can have it, I'll end up choosing not to anyway. I'm not making sense. Sorry!!
  7. I feel like a failure but I am really struggling. I really want to change my relationship with food and these past 11 days have helped, but it is causing enormous stress (I do have a lot of stressors right now, and this feels like another stressor). I love how I feel, I love most of the foods I've tried, but it feels like "one more thing" to obsess about right now. I have a tendency toward binge eating, especially when stressed, and the whole30 is triggering that desire to binge to find some comfort. I am afraid to stop because it will be one more failure. But I'm afraid to continue too. I know I am not supposed to complain...I know it's only 30 days, I know it's for my own good, I know it's not "beating cancer" hard (I already did that). I guess I am just wanting to vent , and wondering if there are others who've had a similar experience. I want to succeed at this...I just don't know if I can. I do want to take these principles forward and continue to follow the paleo and whole9 lifestyle.... I afraid that I won't be able to, though, if I quit now.....but I just don't think I can. continue this. I fully admit I am looking for validation but also just empathy. That's all. Thanks for the opportunity to vent.
  8. My first time posting on the forum ... I was so moved by your post and the stories of others. Thank you for sharing. All of my WW experiences have been awful, leading to more obsession with food, counting, etc. Finally, with the whole30, I am not counting. I am eating when hungry and food is DELICIOUS! I am only on day 11 and I struggle daily with my food demons. I'm terrified that I will go back to my old habits when I'm done. I'm terrified that I will quit. I'm hoping to change my relationship with good and, frankly, I am shocked I've made it this far. Part of me thinks that has just as much to do with the concepts of the whole30 as it does with my (strength, willpower, whatever you want to call the forces that have kept me compliant for the past 10.5 days). Anyway, just wanted to chime in and say I appreciate everyone's honesty and I am glad to know there are others on a similar journey.