Ciara's Whole30, starting October 1st!

[CL30]

Going to be really honest...I am not feeling excited to do this 

At first I typed 'I don't want to do this', but then I deleted it. 

Because in the short-term hell no I don't want to experience sugar withdrawal, decreasing levels of my already low energy, no more alcohol, no more red bull for an easy caffeine fix, no more chocolate (cry) BUT I DO WANT TO DO THIS. 

I have completed a whole 30 before, two years ago now (where did that time go?!) and both during and after completing it I felt absolutely amazing. The best and healthiest and most positive I had ever felt in my life. But, thinking I was 'fixed now', I didn't bother with a proper reintroduction. I fell back into those too-well-trodden paths of bad habits because they're there and they're easy, and although my weight now is actually pretty much the same as it was a couple of years ago, my health is at a supreme all-time low. Stupid Crohn's Disease.

(That's not to say weight isn't a concern, I do need to lose quite a bit, but how I feel will always be more important than how I look, and currently I feel like crap!!)

2017 hasn't been the greatest year so far. But it is looking up - after a lousy 10-month period of test after test after test, the Crohn's is finally diagnosed and responding well to treatment. Although I've been off sick for the last four months, in early November I go back to college to complete the last part of my postgrad studies, and in February I get to start my absolute dream job. I feel very lucky and very grateful to have the opportunity to do exactly what I've always wanted to do, and desperately want to do well there and not muck it up. It will be incredibly challenging. I know to be ready for that challenge I need to be in peak physical and mental health. 

SO I know how amazing I'll feel at the end of my whole 30. And I know that I want to really turn my health around. AND I know that this whole month of October is essentially free time for me - how many people get a full month with no real obligations or responsibilities or distractions like this?! This is my time to really prioritise eating right and sleeping right and moving more. It has to be now. My whole future is there waiting. 

And now, even though I woke up this morning thinking '......ugh...', reading a couple chapters of It Starts with Food and writing this post right here has got me reflecting on WHY I am doing my whole 30. AND I AM READY. Maybe still not totally excited, but ready nonetheless!

Day 1, come at me.