M's Whole30 Log

[Martha Suarez]

Hello, my name is Martha. For the past 2 years of life I have been continuously curious about the Whole30. I started my first round then and lasted I believe a week. This new way of life was an adjustment that I thought would happen fast since I consider myself a quick learner (boy was I high up on my horse). Well that went south and I started to notice more about myself and the role food plays in my life. I decided to try again for real this year and in Sept 2019 I actually went for it and got 2 weeks down!!! I felt so good about this accomplishment, its been the longest one yet. But I caved in when someone offered me local honey, my emotions and thoughts spiraled and I beat myself up about not finishing like I envisioned. I felt how my mood just went from good to gloomy in a matter of second. I've been on the stop and go wagon ever since. 

 

I want to conquer this for MYSELF.

I want to not be tired all the time, achy, foggy, overeating, dependent on treats to get me thru the day.

I want to enjoy food - healthy and not.

I want to feel good about my decisions & not beat myself up.

I want to work on my mental health.

 

So I decided maybe this time around I'd record it here and get some accountability. I hope talking out-loud helps me since my battle with food is a silent one not many know about. Its all such a slow process and most of the time I feel like I should be in a different place. I basically know what to stay away from and what to eat. So why is this really hard for me? Its only food! 

DAY 1 Whole 30 #5

Meal 1: leftover turkey meatballs, sweet potatoes & kale, butternut squash (dinner leftovers)

Meal 2: leftover meal 1 & more sweet potatoes topped with avocado, s &p, lemon, evoo, sardines in tomato sauce

Snack: green tea

Meal 3: herbed chicken, green beans, baked potato from BJs restaurant

Supplements: None

Exercise: None

Thoughts/comments/randomness: I slipped and had a few spoonfuls of a choc cookie with ice cream ( tasted exactly how I imagined it = alright). All day I was craving sugar (I work at a bakery!!!) I've doing so good at talking myself out of the usual habits of eating what I want. It mostly feels like a battle against myself. I'm a very visual person, I dont have to want it to eat it. I have to look at it and then I want it. My strategy lately has been to ask myself, how is this going to make me feel? is it really worth it? ( I am a Gretchen Rubins 4 Tendencies Questioner). And just when I think I'm doing a good job I cave in and have something that looks super delicious.

 

I keep telling myself that maybe I'll just eat it too much and get tired of it sooner or later...not working for me tho. I'll try again tomorrow.