MadyVanilla

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MadyVanilla last won the day on September 3

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  1. And I fell off the wagon - HARD. I kept telling myself I haven't strayed for very long, it won't take much to get back...6 weeks!!! I've been off for six weeks! Even longer, really, because the slide started before then. I'm not ready yet to read back over my last few posts. I need to get myself in a positive frame of mind. Returning to a greater than full work load, virtual school, was really hard. Exhausting. There were no brain cells left at the end of the day...did a day really even ever end? Looking back, it was such a nebulous blur. The skills that I had really worked on
  2. I'm just here. Going to start over tomorrow. I have so much good, nourishing food it would almost be impossible not to eat W30. And yet, I was derailed by Labor Day barbecue food, wine, and my mother-in-law's brownies...I made the choice to indulge. I have a date for a bike ride with a friend in an hour. I'll be back tomorrow ready for day 1 again.
  3. What Schrodinger said... I'll add that meal prep and clean-up may seem daunting after the initial excitement wears off, but it gets much, much easier. The forum and FB groups are excellent resources for how to find short-cuts, too. Welcome and good luck!
  4. There are so many mental games that I play with myself, the scale is just one. I used to think a daily weigh-in kept me in line, but it didn't-I often didn't weigh myself if I had eaten "bad" the day before. But those days that I did, and the scale went down despite the "bad" choices, oh the fun mental games with that scenario! This summer, my plan has evolved into working on self-honesty. Calling myself out and taking responsibility for stuff. It's ALWAYS my choice-no one force feeds me. Working on the all-or-none thinking. It's a process, for sure. Day 11 Mood-8, Energy-6,
  5. Another late day post...those of you that work such long hours, how do you even manage to eat one healthy meal, let alone several and get in exercise???? Day 10 Mood-8, Energy-6, Pain-0 It's been a good day, so much accomplished, and I solved a problem for 4 people who were all very grateful. I was able to shower, dress, and get breakfast at an appropriate time this morning, but then the day took off. Lunch...I was again just wanting to grab something. I'm struggling a little more with the cravings this time around, I'm not sure what that's about, maybe just being busy,
  6. Me, too. Quarantine...I remember reading something that said the way we are impacted by it is similar to how we live on our incomes. There are lots of people who make less money (have less resources during pandemic), but most people still live at the top of their means (are near their "wits-end" during the pandemic). Our own reality is so vastly different than what it has every been that to expect ourselves to grin and bear it and accept our lot as just the way things are without any grieving would be the same as expecting ourselves to carry on as normal in the face of financial deva
  7. You are getting so much exercise! I know what you mean about letting yourself go in March...it was a tough time, full of fearful unknowns. You are working yourself back to where you were. Enjoy the visit with your family!
  8. I like to ease into it myself...it seems to help, getting into a preparation mindset. I'm looking forward to following your journey!
  9. You've had such an awesome week, and such cool NSVs already! Whether or not you decide to go to the gym or spend time with your bf tonight the important thing to keep in mind is that you are making the best choices for your health, whether it be your physical, mental, or emotional health. Sometimes we need to hang out with loved ones, sometimes we need to go to the gym. And the salt.....so true!
  10. These crazy days...I have forgotten how stressful work can be! It's amazing to me that I just handled these days previously. I've gotten soft while working from home, lol. I keep saying things will calm at work - I'm still hopeful... So it's almost dinner time and I'm just getting around to journaling. Yesterday went fine, I dressed for the gym, set my alarm, and got myself there and back before my afternoon meeting. I didn't have time to lift, though, and didn't get 8k steps. Today is not looking so hot, either - I've only gotten 1,400 so far. That is correct. It is a little aft
  11. I really like this idea. It goes along with my desire for structure. I hope you continue to journal as you reintroduce!
  12. Yesterday was a real trial. Things began going downhill shortly before lunch...I had an urgent question to answer for a co-worker that required me to gather a yes or no answer from 9 other people. After an hour, I had only heard back from 3 people. I was annoyed because the task was given to me and because everyone is supposed to be on their computers (where email pops up) and should have had time to answer me. So I texted, and got several "I think so" answers. Then I had a Zoom with several other people, one of whom I thought was going to relieve me of some responsibilities, but turns ou
  13. Day 7. I am constantly amazed by how food impacts my mindset and vice versa. A week ago I was grumbly and not wanting to commit to W30 and now I'm easily managing compliant meals. I've said this before - this seems simple and strong but it could crumble any moment, it's a true paper lion. Acknowledging the fragility is important to helping me be realistic and not so black-and-white in my thinking. Mood-7, Energy-7, Pain-2. A lot of "hurry-up-and-wait" with work making things more stressful than they were 2 weeks ago, but it should calm and settle into a nice routine later this week
  14. This happens to me, too, the improved sleep on Whole30 and the winter blues. Have fun in spin class tonight with your new shoes!