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less off-roading, more like: veered off completely and crashed into a telephone pole

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ok, completed my whole30 not too long ago. i had a couple of rough days on 27, 28, and 29 (prematurely tested sugary treats) and extended my whole30 three extra days to feel better about it.

then my dog who i've had the better half of my life needed to be put down and i went off the rails. bad.

i'd like to say that i feel justified, but i don't and i know it's an excuse. even though we all talk about how food is emotional, it shouldn't have allowed me to go food crazy.

i spent a week or so 'testing' out foods and then just let it all go. most meals the last two weeks have been fairly compliant, but i have been eating so much crap sugar i can't even believe it.

i had hoped that my body would react really poorly to the foods i tested, so that i would feel better about my clean eating. yes i've had more gas, and yes sometimes i've had rumbles, but i was hoping and expecting to feel quite sick eating non-compliant food. it's making it a lot harder to want to get back to clean eating. emotionally i feel bad about the cupcake b/c i know i shouldn't be eating it, but it's not physically making me sick, and so it's hard to see it as a bad thing...

clearly, i have a violently aggressive sugar dragon that needs slaying. and quickly.

i keep telling myself that tomorrow i'll get back on another whole30/45/60 (whatever it takes).

it's been about a week of tomorrows.

i'm not even sure what i'm looking for by posting this. i know all of the right answers. and my first whole30 was fairly great (aside from some gnarly sugar cravings pre-menstrual cycle time).

additionally i've had two weddings to attend in the last two weeks (which really didn't help), and a week-long business trip coming up that i'm worried about.

help! guidance appreciated.

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Hi Nikki,

Start now!!!

I just started my 2nd Whole30 today after some increasingly reckless off-roading. I did great for about 2 months, but the past month has been a little nuts and I spent the last 2 weeks saying I would start another Whole30 and then just couldn't get my head in the game.

I spent the weekend reading ISWF and now I'm all motivated... well, I was last night. Dragging now, but committed.

I read somewhere here that people often find doing a 2nd Whole30 harder than the first. I can definitely say that's been the case with me.

When I travel I like to take some Purewraps (amazing whole30 approved coconut wraps) and some Applegate Farms roast turkey slices. I make a wrap with turkey, avocado, english cucumber and a little pepper. I also pre-cut a bunch of veggies to eat with. SO SO good and very portable. I also read the suggestion to take a crockpot along on trips. I thought this was a great idea!

Best of luck to you!

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What stands out in your post is your stress. Stress can be an incrediblly heavy anchor that retards or prevents progress.

Managing our behavioural response to stress is very difficult. Some of us pout, some cry, we snap at our kids, sit on the couch, mope, pout, and all other sorts of behaviours. While we can't eliminate stress from our lives, nor the emotions we have reacting to the stress, we do have control over our behaviour. If you reward your stress with sugar, then recognize that. You have complete control.

When you reach for the cupcake, just stop and tell yourself that you'll eat it after you do a handstand and sing "Oh Canada" while upside-down.. Sound ridiculous? Good! The point is not to do a handstand and sing (but you really should do this once for fun), but to stop and think about what you're doing. This should be a signal to you that stress and the dragon are controlling you. You want to control them.

Control what you can. Plan your meals, plan your day, get in bed early, go hard in your workouts. Not every day is a winner, but you'll be on the right track.

With your upcoming work trip, just make a plan -- even if it is a full week of off-roading. Minimize the stress. Its a week in your life, not your life.

Breathe, smile, relax.

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My condolences on your dog Nikki. I went through the same thing years ago and it still stings. It is a major stressor, don't beat yourself up. You'll get to your goals. Time is nature's way of preventing everything from happening at once.

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sweet girl, please don't give up or beat yourself up! as someone who's struggled with eating disorders for years, i can tell you that hating yourself is the WORST thing you can do. society tells women that it's not ok to not be perfect; that we have to manage family deaths (your doggie counts!!) with grace and poise, while still juggling everything smoothly and walking miles in our jimmy choo heels. but the truth? you just lost your best friend. you don't have to punish yourself with food rules right now. so, you aren't doing a perfect whole 30 right now. so what? how about just treating yourself with as much love and gentleness as you can? just enjoy these next few weddings as a cheer you up from your loss, eat solid meals when you can, and promise yourself that when all this blows over, that you will knock 'em dead. just love yourself in the process, ok?

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just wanted to say thank you for all of the support and encouragement. i am starting a modified whole30 again tomorrow, with the plan of sticking to the rules as closely as possible. once i get back from my work trip i will go back to full blown whole30. again, thanks for the positivity.

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