Lindsey's First REAL Whole 30 Log

[lindseyjoisreal]

So I've tried this Whole 30 thing before. Once. And I only made it 5 days. I was in a really rough place emotionally and I just didn't have the support, or the willpower, to make it longer than that. That was a year ago. 

 

Two years ago I also maintained a ketogenic diet for 7 months, before I moved off to college and I found myself no longer able to maintain a low carb lifestyle.

 

I'm ready to go at this thing again. And this time, for real. This is really what I want to do. 

I need to help myself change the way I look at food. My relationship with food has always been terrible; I've always been one to emotionally eat. I don't want to do that anymore. I want to eat food that will nurture my body, not just dull my emotions. 

 

So, why am I doing this? 

1. To change the way I look at food.
2. To help myself be and feel healthier. 
3. To make feeding myself an act of self-care. 
4. (Later) to figure out what foods my body has a negative reaction to. 

I'm also doing this in hopes it will, along with other forms of treatment, help me with my Bipolar 2. 

 

 

I'm feeling incredibly hopeful. I want to hold on to that. 

 

I cleaned out my pantry and fridge today. Got rid of all of the stuff that I no longer want to eat. Meal planned, and stocked the fridge and pantry with fresh vegetables and meats and good foods. This is Day 0 for me. I know that I'm going to get the "Carb Flu", I've experienced it before and it's no fun. But I feel like making this change in my life is going to be very worth it. 

 

 

So that I can look back later to what I started from, here is what I ate today--

 

Breakfast--Plain Bagel, Cream Cheese, Chocolate Chips, Red Powerade

 

Lunch--Nutella (I know...)

 

Dinner--In-n-Out Double Double (Protein Style, L&T Only), Fries, Pink Lemonade

 

Snack--Orange Soda, Mike&Ikes

 

 

 

Tomorrow starts Day 1. I have a plan and I'm feeling hopeful. 

 

Gonna try and hold on to this hope for as long as possible. 

[lindseyjoisreal]

Day 1 went fairly well. I was feeling really lethargic, but I think that was because of the medication I'm on to manage my Bipolar 2. I was already having some really intense sugar cravings. I wasn't having a soda EVERY day previously, but enough that mid afternoon i was starting to want one real badly. And chocolate. Not even good chocolate. I was craving really crappy chocolate. Didn't give in to either of those. I know it's my Sugar Dragon, and if it's already rearing its head that badly on day one, I can only imagine it will get worse. 

 

I ate fairly well, though. And I made it through the cravings and the day of questioning why the hell I'm doing this. I feel like  was eating enough, but my brain was hungry for white bread and nutella and soda all day. So even after I ate it'd be like, hey you're not done... I feel like I was eating enough. I think I'll try and include more fat on Day 2. 

 

 

Breakfast-- "Monkey Salad" (a very green banana, a few sliced almonds, a small handful of unsweetened coconut), two eggs scrambled in ghee, a small zucchini sauteed in ghee

 

Lunch-- A generous handful of black olives, satueed cabbage/carrots with garlic and bacon, a small pork chop

 

Dinner-- Sweet potato fries (nom nom paleo), steamed broccoli drizzled with ghee, half of a t-bone steak

 

 

I also had a few olives when I was craving sugar throughout the day.

Drank 64oz of water (which isn't as much as I should have, but it's more than normal for me).

 

Overall, I think Day 1 went well. I have a somewhat plan for Day 2, but it's not set in stone. My partner is coming over for dinner, so I'm going to be cooking for him as well. 

[lindseyjoisreal]

Day 2 and I'm just not hungry. Made myself a nice breakfast and it's going to take a lot to get myself to eat it. It's not that I'm bored or don't like what I made. It's just that I'm really not hungry. Can't help but wondering if this is normal...

[lindseyjoisreal]

Today was okay. Somehow ended up only eating two meals (okay, so I know exactly how, but...). I just haven't been hungry. I forced myself to eat a big breakfast and a big dinner. 

 

Really hoping I get my appetite back soon. 

 

 

 

Breakfast-- Two fried eggs, cabbage, one small white potato, three small pieces of bacon, one apple, homemade almond butter

 

Dinner--Small baked white potato (with bacon and lots of ghee and green onions), a large portion of asparagus, and half of a large pork chop

[lindseyjoisreal]

Day 3 Completed. Still not much of an appetite, and had several hours of seriously doubting myself, but I made it through the day. 

 

 

Breakfast-- Green banana, handful of coconut flakes, tablespoon of sliced almonds, quarter cup of homemade almond milk

 

Lunch-- (What I made-- Sauteed cabbage leaves filled with ground beef, tomato sauce, onion, and sauteed kale)

              What I ate-- Ground beef, tomato sauce, and onions

 

"Snack"-- Big handful of shredded carrots 

 

Dinner-- Almond crusted chicken breast, zoodles, and leftover potato from last night. (THIS WAS SO GOOD and was the first thing I actually had an appetite for in two days)

 

 

Today went fairly well. I've been really doubting myself. Especially because I hadn't had an appetite. I'm still having some self doubt. My partner is being very supportive, though, and I feel like I can at least focus on making it through one day at a time. I made it through today and I feel like I can definitely make it through tomorrow. 

 

Also, the last 2 days have brought on some really intense depression for me. I wonder if that's just how the carb flu manifests in me. I don't know. Whatever the reason, I'd really like it to go away.