Day 21 and a meltdown

[azulemma]

I'm so disappointed in myself right now. I was doing incredibly well and suddenly, without any kind of trigger or warning, I went on a complete binge and ate everything I knew--I knew-- I shouldn't. Just completely went crazy. I have a history of this but I truly thought I was over that. I had more energy, my face was clearing up, I felt great. But now I feel as if I've undone all those weeks of hard work. The only thing I can think of that could've caused this episode is my dinner the other night--I went out to a friends house and ate some ham, mostly to be polite but looking back, I have no idea where it came from or what kind of oil she cooked it in. Do I have to start all over now? What should I do to get back on the wagon? I want so badly for this to work for me!

[SalsaEzz]

Hi Azulemma,

 

Don't be so hard on yourself. You did a fantastic job to get to 21 days. You are not a failure and don't be disappointed with yourself, simply say to yourself that it's a mistake and learn from it.

 

I suffer from this same problem, uncontrollable binge eating... on occasion.. triggered but what seems something random.

 

I suspect it was exactly the ham. Ham is always processed and we shouldn't eat deli meets. If this were me, it would have ridden on my mind, making me feel guilty "I can't believe I ate the ham", "Have I broken my whole 30?" "Was there sugar? oil?" "I don't know if I've broken it".

 

This would have driven me crazy all night and day, consciously or sub-consciously, and then I would have thought "Stuff it, I've broken it anyway I may as well do whatever I want now". = massive binge

 

This thought pattern is not conscious and you never feel guilt or remorse until after the bingeing is done.

 

It's completely up to you, but I think you deserve to give yourself another chance. Start again at Day 1 and go into it armed with how to deal with this situation again

 

Also - I've read a couple of books lately that helped me. The best one is called "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay. Some of it was a bit wacky for me, but a lot of it rang true.

 

The biggest lesson is this (for me), imagine your 3 year old self inside yourself and never say things to yourself that you wouldn't say to a little 3 year old girl. Encourage and support, don't berate and guilt.

 

You haven't wasted the whole thing, just a set back.

 

You can do it!

[jennor]

You did a Whole21 instead. And that is great too! My first "whole30" was a 16, the next one was a 21 and then I finally did a 30. And guess what, I learned tons from each one of them, and they changed my life. You did well! Now re-group and decide if you want to start another one right now, or wait a bit and ride your own bike a little first. You have the rest of your life to tweak your habits and your relationship with food and your body. Your next whole30 will be much easier.

[KanaP]

thanks for this Salsaezz :

 

"The biggest lesson is this (for me), imagine your 3 year old self inside yourself and never say things to yourself that you wouldn't say to a little 3 year old girl. Encourage and support, don't berate and guilt."

 

I never thought of it that way, but it's true, I would never speak to my daughter the way I speak to myself... Food for thought!

[lisaf83]

Just done exaxtly the same at day 24 so frustrated! :-( but happy with what I have acheived just didnt think I would want to binge anymore, not felt the need for 24 days and then it was like nothing could stop me.