Starting May 25th

[Guest bfree11]

Day 82 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain siggi yogurt, berries, chia seeds, 2 eggs

Snack: apple

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, balsamic vinaigrette, unsweetened iced tea

Dinner: chicken and broccoli

Exercise: Rest Day

 

As I drove across Florida this morning, I thought about all the things I used to eat when going on a long drive. I'd buy snacks, treats, and fast food. Today was different. I ate my breakfast in the car and in the middle of the 4 hour drive, I ate an apple. For lunch, I had a salad with chicken like I usually do. The salad came with pita bread on it and I immediately removed it and put it on my grandma's plate. I like to use balsamic vinegar and olive oil for dressing, but they just had a balsamic vinaigrette that probably had extra sugar in it. I had a tiny bit and threw the rest away. When I eat alone at home, I don't think much about bread and sugar, but when dining with others, I see bread and sugar everywhere and I think about how delicious it would taste. 

 

I had an interesting conversation with my super fit brother-in-law at dinner tonight. He had a little bit of bread with his dinner and was explaining to me that having "just a little" satisfies his cravings and works for him. I explained to him that for me, having "just a little" unleashes my sugar dragon. If I have a piece of bread, I'll start thinking more and more about bread. Right now, I really want to have my weight loss be my main focus. When I reach my goal weight, I will eat bread, dark chocolate, drink wine, etc. in moderation and not worry about it, but first I want to cross that finish line!

 

My sister is having me meet her at the hotel gym at 6am for a workout in the morning! I'm pretty excited! It's fun to have someone to workout with and I'm so lucky to have such a supportive sister! I was really happy that my sister and family noticed a difference in my appearance when they saw me today. I remember talking about going on this trip back in June with my sister and hoping that I'd look different when she saw me! It felt good to hear that in the almost 2 months since I did my official Whole 30, I look like I've lost even more weight. Life after Whole 30 isn't as bad as I thought it would be!

[Higgles]

Road trips... man, I used to love an excuse to eat like a pig to help pass the time. I went to college about 3.5 hours away from school, I would hit the wawa and get snacks, even after college when I would make a road trip I never thought twice about trying to be healthy. When I met my husband and we were going to do a roadtrip, he was like, why would we stop at a convenience store? We have coffee and water bottles at home, have breakfast before you leave? We'll take a box of crackers in the car. I was like oh well, yes all of that makes sense. He was looking at it from a financial perspective, but in reality, because he doesn't have the food issues I have, he had no reason to see it as a reason to eat crap for no reason.

 

So good for you on making some healthy decisions. Also good on you for explaining to your brother in law that "moderation" doesn't work for everyone. I cringe when I think how many times I used that as an excuse to eat something unhealthy... "well, a little now will prevent me from overeating later" yet I never looked back to see if that ever worked (it didn't!).

 

So I made some bad decisions last night, and I feel like I'm in the dating scenario you spoke about. We move around so much we find it hard to make friends. Also, a lot of people our age have kids and we don't, and we've found that people who have kids tend to like to be around people who have kids and so its been frustrating to find other couple friends to hang out with. When we do find someone, I feel like we're dating... so we just had two new guys move here, one has a wife and the other has a wife and baby. We decided we should all go out to this "spanish garden" event at this big garden in the city. My immediate thoughts yesterday were, ok I can do this. I'm going to have dinner first at home and then we'll meet up with everyone so I don't have to worry about making bad decisions. Normally I would never do that, I'd just be like oh yay a party count me in! The issue here is, the couple with a kid can't stay out late, so if we had dinner at home we wouldn't make it out in time, so we decided to just go and eat with everyone because we want to have fun and feel included. The "garden party" was a bust so after the couple with the kid left the other couple and us went out to dinner, which was a lot of fun. The issue is that it was mainly a pizza place, and everyone at the table was ordering pizza... so I thought, ok I'll splurge (such self-induced peer pressure). I ate half the pizza, and drank wayy too much wine. I felt so bad about myself immediately after, and then had an awful stomach ache when we got home. I told my husband the pizza wasn't worth it, and he understood and got me some pepto, lol, but I'm really glad he didn't try to warn me ahead of time because I would have gotten mad at him, and by learning my lesson I hopefully will make better decisions next time.

 

What i hate about this situation is that we want to make friends, yet so often friends and food go together. Before we find someone to go take a day trip to a new city with us, we'll all want to make sure we enjoy ourselves and it seems that eating and drinking is how people try each other out.

 

I think last night went well though, and so maybe next time we can do something more adventerous and not just go out to eat, because as much as me and the hubs love each other, we want other people to talk and hang out with! Also, I wrote this entire post right before I'm heading out to another German city for a "pigfest" festival, so this will be an interesting day.

 

Enjoy your workouts and keep the fact that everyone can see posititve changes in you as your motivation

[Guest bfree11]

Road trips... man, I used to love an excuse to eat like a pig to help pass the time. I went to college about 3.5 hours away from school, I would hit the wawa and get snacks, even after college when I would make a road trip I never thought twice about trying to be healthy. When I met my husband and we were going to do a roadtrip, he was like, why would we stop at a convenience store? We have coffee and water bottles at home, have breakfast before you leave? We'll take a box of crackers in the car. I was like oh well, yes all of that makes sense. He was looking at it from a financial perspective, but in reality, because he doesn't have the food issues I have, he had no reason to see it as a reason to eat crap for no reason.

 

So good for you on making some healthy decisions. Also good on you for explaining to your brother in law that "moderation" doesn't work for everyone. I cringe when I think how many times I used that as an excuse to eat something unhealthy... "well, a little now will prevent me from overeating later" yet I never looked back to see if that ever worked (it didn't!).

 

So I made some bad decisions last night, and I feel like I'm in the dating scenario you spoke about. We move around so much we find it hard to make friends. Also, a lot of people our age have kids and we don't, and we've found that people who have kids tend to like to be around people who have kids and so its been frustrating to find other couple friends to hang out with. When we do find someone, I feel like we're dating... so we just had two new guys move here, one has a wife and the other has a wife and baby. We decided we should all go out to this "spanish garden" event at this big garden in the city. My immediate thoughts yesterday were, ok I can do this. I'm going to have dinner first at home and then we'll meet up with everyone so I don't have to worry about making bad decisions. Normally I would never do that, I'd just be like oh yay a party count me in! The issue here is, the couple with a kid can't stay out late, so if we had dinner at home we wouldn't make it out in time, so we decided to just go and eat with everyone because we want to have fun and feel included. The "garden party" was a bust so after the couple with the kid left the other couple and us went out to dinner, which was a lot of fun. The issue is that it was mainly a pizza place, and everyone at the table was ordering pizza... so I thought, ok I'll splurge (such self-induced peer pressure). I ate half the pizza, and drank wayy too much wine. I felt so bad about myself immediately after, and then had an awful stomach ache when we got home. I told my husband the pizza wasn't worth it, and he understood and got me some pepto, lol, but I'm really glad he didn't try to warn me ahead of time because I would have gotten mad at him, and by learning my lesson I hopefully will make better decisions next time.

 

What i hate about this situation is that we want to make friends, yet so often friends and food go together. Before we find someone to go take a day trip to a new city with us, we'll all want to make sure we enjoy ourselves and it seems that eating and drinking is how people try each other out.

 

I think last night went well though, and so maybe next time we can do something more adventerous and not just go out to eat, because as much as me and the hubs love each other, we want other people to talk and hang out with! Also, I wrote this entire post right before I'm heading out to another German city for a "pigfest" festival, so this will be an interesting day.

 

Enjoy your workouts and keep the fact that everyone can see posititve changes in you as your motivation

It's so hard to deal with social situations and food. It's kind of sad how difficult society makes it to be healthy. It's good that you ate the pizza though because now hopefully pizza will be associated with feeling sick in your head. As long as we're being mindful, listening to our bodies, only eating when we're hungry, and learning from our mistakes, then I think we'll be okay. Maybe you can take the lead on choosing restaurants or active things to do with new friends. I find that when I'm in control, it's a lot easier.

 

And thanks for the encouragement, I feel like i'm making such slow progress and it's bumming me out. 

[Guest bfree11]

Day 83 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain Fage yogurt, berries, teaspoon of granola, 1 egg, kombucha

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, balsamic vinaigrette, feta, unsweetened iced tea

Dinner: steamed chicken, tofu, veggies, 1/4 cup brown rice, tea

Exercise: INSANITY Plyometrics

 

First, a few words about eating healthy when traveling. My sister has taught me to go to a grocery store when traveling and put things in your hotel fridge for breakfast and snacks. Genius. I brought my own yogurt and fruit down to breakfast this morning and it made healthy living so much easier. My sister had bought a brand of granola called Bear Naked and it's pretty clean, low in sugar, high in protein, not much artificial stuff. She told me that putting a teaspoon in my yogurt wouldn't make or break my weight loss and it would make my yogurt more enjoyable. I didn't feel any stomach pain from eating it and it was nice to have for a change. I'm not sure if I'd have the self-control to keep a bag of it in my house, but if I was able to control my portions appropriately, it would be a fun thing to add to my breakfast routine.

 

For lunch, I asked for more chicken and a little feta today. And at dinner, I had a little brown rice. So that's 3 new non-Whole 30 things I ate today: granola, feta, and brown rice. The key is that I had very small portion sizes. I kind of had it in my head that I could never touch these foods while trying to lose weight because they're just going to slow down the process, so what's the point. But, all 3 of these things helped make my meals more filling and enjoyable. It's interesting too that I actually didn't have the slightest urge to eat more than the small portion I was given of these things. I was surprised that I didn't feel such a strong emotional connection to these foods! I think it's because I have my eyes on the prize. My goals are just waaaay more important to me now than carbs and sugar. I know what I want and I'm going to help myself get there any way I can. For me, going out to a restaurant used to be all about the junk food and how excited I was to indulge. Now, it's about the company I'm with, or getting the proper amounts of macro-nutrients so that I can feel strong in my workouts. I enjoy having no stomach discomfort, regrets, or shame after I eat a meal. So many of my old snacking and binge behaviors are starting to just become faint memories.  

 

I owe most of my success so far to only eating when I'm hungry. We went to the movies today shortly after lunch and I didn't even think about wanting a snack at the theater because I didn't feel any hunger. Once I was able to establish the hunger rule for myself, a lot of my eating behaviors improved. 

 

The most painful part of this journey has been that regardless to all of the hard work I've put in and progress I've made, I'm still 167 lb and 5'1". I have a long way to go. I have never been thin, so I had no idea what my goal weight should be, so I asked my sister what she weighed today. She weighs about 15 lb less than what I was thinking my goal weight should be. Her and I are the same height and she's very fit. I was a little bummed that this probably means that my journey is going to be a little longer than I thought. I just hope it all comes off eventually. Looking at all of my loose jiggly skin from the 93 lb I've lost so far (over 7 years) is painful for me too. It's so cruel that after all this hard work, I'm still stuck with all of these flabby awkward body parts, like my arms. I really want to avoid getting it removed surgically, but it may be what I end up doing. It's sad to me that I have to go through all of this just because I ate too much. Eating all of that junk food was so not worth it. I hate that I did this to my body and I hate how long it takes to undo it. 

 

This morning I woke up at 5:45 am to do an Insanity DVD with my sister in the hotel gym before her kids woke up. It was a lot of cardio and jumping. It made me realize that cardio really really needs to be my weight loss secret weapon right now. I'm eating so clean and doing plenty of strength training, so all that's left is cardio. It was cool to see my sister have to take a few breaks during the workout because it showed me that even thin people can find workouts challenging. Sometimes I have this fantasy that if you're thin, you can accomplish anything with ease and that life just becomes a breeze. I'm a very "all or nothing" thinker. So if I'm bad at something, I may decide not to do it at all sometimes. But seeing my fit sister make modifications on certain exercises in the video proved to me that I can make these things accessible for me and still get a good workout in. When I get home, I'm going to bump up my cardio as much as possible. 

 

It's really hard to stay positive. Even with all of you awesome people cheering my on. I look in the mirror and I'm not where I want to be. I couldn't fit in the middle seat in the back seat of the car between 2 car seats today. I had to sit in the front because I'm too overweight. This is such a shitty feeling. Even with 83 days of working my ass off, I'm still too big. I'm not going to give up or sabotage this, but I'm still going to be honest and acknowledge that this royally sucks. When reminders that I haven't reached my goal yet pop up like this one, I always stay strong and keep on eating healthy and exercising. I don't use food to comfort myself when I'm sad anymore. I use writing to get out my frustrations! We live in a society where junk food is so easily accessible and you actually have to go out of your way and usually even pay more, if you want to eat clean. The people out there that manage to work through on the obstacles in our society and stay fit amaze me. It's hard work and a lot of willpower. I'm so thankful that my sister and brother-in-law make healthy living a priority. Having their support during this vacation has been so valuable. 

 

My body image is this roller coaster of "ooo I look skinny today from this angle" or "wow this used to be so tight on me" and "my batwings are disgusting and my entire body jiggles every time I move" or "I'm going to have to pay tens of thousands of dollars to get skin surgery and fix my mistakes and have scars all over my body to remind myself of all of my poor eating choices." I'm happy and proud of my progress and disgusted and disappointed by my progress, all at the same time! 

 

I just pray that this will all be a distant memory in a year and I'll be living a happy life at my goal weight. A girl can dream. Patience. Consistency. Cardio. 

[Guest bfree11]

Day 83 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain Fage yogurt, berries, teaspoon of granola, 1 egg, kombucha

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, balsamic vinaigrette, feta, unsweetened iced tea

Dinner: steamed chicken, tofu, veggies, 1/4 cup brown rice, tea

Exercise: INSANITY Plyometrics

 

First, a few words about eating healthy when traveling. My sister has taught me to go to a grocery store when traveling and put things in your hotel fridge for breakfast and snacks. Genius. I brought my own yogurt and fruit down to breakfast this morning and it made healthy living so much easier. My sister had bought a brand of granola called Bear Naked and it's pretty clean, low in sugar, high in protein, not much artificial stuff. She told me that putting a teaspoon in my yogurt wouldn't make or break my weight loss and it would make my yogurt more enjoyable. I didn't feel any stomach pain from eating it and it was nice to have for a change. I'm not sure if I'd have the self-control to keep a bag of it in my house, but if I was able to control my portions appropriately, it would be a fun thing to add to my breakfast routine.

 

For lunch, I asked for more chicken and a little feta today. And at dinner, I had a little brown rice. So that's 3 new non-Whole 30 things I ate today: granola, feta, and brown rice. The key is that I had very small portion sizes. I kind of had it in my head that I could never touch these foods while trying to lose weight because they're just going to slow down the process, so what's the point. But, all 3 of these things helped make my meals more filling and enjoyable. It's interesting too that I actually didn't have the slightest urge to eat more than the small portion I was given of these things. I was surprised that I didn't feel such a strong emotional connection to these foods! I think it's because I have my eyes on the prize. My goals are just waaaay more important to me now than carbs and sugar. I know what I want and I'm going to help myself get there any way I can. For me, going out to a restaurant used to be all about the junk food and how excited I was to indulge. Now, it's about the company I'm with, or getting the proper amounts of macro-nutrients so that I can feel strong in my workouts. I enjoy having no stomach discomfort, regrets, or shame after I eat a meal. So many of my old snacking and binge behaviors are starting to just become faint memories.  

 

I owe most of my success so far to only eating when I'm hungry. We went to the movies today shortly after lunch and I didn't even think about wanting a snack at the theater because I didn't feel any hunger. Once I was able to establish the hunger rule for myself, a lot of my eating behaviors improved. 

 

The most painful part of this journey has been that regardless to all of the hard work I've put in and progress I've made, I'm still 167 lb and 5'1". I have a long way to go. I have never been thin, so I had no idea what my goal weight should be, so I asked my sister what she weighed today. She weighs about 15 lb less than what I was thinking my goal weight should be. Her and I are the same height and she's very fit. I was a little bummed that this probably means that my journey is going to be a little longer than I thought. I just hope it all comes off eventually. Looking at all of my loose jiggly skin from the 93 lb I've lost so far (over 7 years) is painful for me too. It's so cruel that after all this hard work, I'm still stuck with all of these flabby awkward body parts, like my arms. I really want to avoid getting it removed surgically, but it may be what I end up doing. It's sad to me that I have to go through all of this just because I ate too much. Eating all of that junk food was so not worth it. I hate that I did this to my body and I hate how long it takes to undo it. 

 

This morning I woke up at 5:45 am to do an Insanity DVD with my sister in the hotel gym before her kids woke up. It was a lot of cardio and jumping. It made me realize that cardio really really needs to be my weight loss secret weapon right now. I'm eating so clean and doing plenty of strength training, so all that's left is cardio. It was cool to see my sister have to take a few breaks during the workout because it showed me that even thin people can find workouts challenging. Sometimes I have this fantasy that if you're thin, you can accomplish anything with ease and that life just becomes a breeze. I'm a very "all or nothing" thinker. So if I'm bad at something, I may decide not to do it at all sometimes. But seeing my fit sister make modifications on certain exercises in the video proved to me that I can make these things accessible for me and still get a good workout in. When I get home, I'm going to bump up my cardio as much as possible. 

 

It's really hard to stay positive. Even with all of you awesome people cheering my on. I look in the mirror and I'm not where I want to be. I couldn't fit in the middle seat in the back seat of the car between 2 car seats today. I had to sit in the front because I'm too overweight. This is such a shitty feeling. Even with 83 days of working my ass off, I'm still too big. I'm not going to give up or sabotage this, but I'm still going to be honest and acknowledge that this royally sucks. When reminders that I haven't reached my goal yet pop up like this one, I always stay strong and keep on eating healthy and exercising. I don't use food to comfort myself when I'm sad anymore. I use writing to get out my frustrations! We live in a society where junk food is so easily accessible and you actually have to go out of your way and usually even pay more, if you want to eat clean. The people out there that manage to work through on the obstacles in our society and stay fit amaze me. It's hard work and a lot of willpower. I'm so thankful that my sister and brother-in-law make healthy living a priority. Having their support during this vacation has been so valuable. 

 

My body image is this roller coaster of "ooo I look skinny today from this angle" or "wow this used to be so tight on me" and "my batwings are disgusting and my entire body jiggles every time I move" or "I'm going to have to pay tens of thousands of dollars to get skin surgery and fix my mistakes and have scars all over my body to remind myself of all of my poor eating choices." I'm happy and proud of my progress and disgusted and disappointed by my progress, all at the same time! 

 

I just pray that this will all be a distant memory in a year and I'll be living a happy life at my goal weight. A girl can dream. Patience. Consistency. Cardio. 

[Guest bfree11]

Day 84 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain Fage yogurt, berries, teaspoon of granola, black coffee

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, balsamic vinaigrette, feta, 1 small piece of pita, unsweetened iced tea

Dinner: sushi with avocado, cucumber, carrots, grilled chicken (no sauce)

Exercise: INSANITY Cardio, ran laps in the hotel hallways

 

Today I ate more things that aren't Whole 30. I had the teaspoon of granola again, the light feta (specifically asked for less) on my salad, a small piece of pita that came with the salad, and sushi, which had rice inside of it. I asked my sister permission before I made each of these decisions because I wanted to make sure that every meal I eat is conducive to weight loss. The fact that she gave me the green light on all of these things (and believe me, she's strict and disciplined) showed me that my meals can still be yummy and have elements of excitement. I've been so rigid with most grains and dairy, but my sister has helped me understand what a reasonable portion size looks like of these things when trying to lose weight. For example, the healthy, high protein, low sugar granola that I've been eating on this trip has a serving size of 1/4 cup. I've been having 1 tsp. That 1 tsp makes a HUGE difference in the flavor profile of my breakfast while hardly affecting my caloric intake for the day. I'm always focusing on how to get protein and veggies at lunch and dinner and as long as dairy or grains play a tiny role in the meal, then I can still lose weight. At breakfast, I don't focus so much on the veggie intake, but I'm always trying to pack in protein and fruit for energy. I look at food now and think, "what can this do for me?" I avoid sugar pretty much completely because it can't do anything to help me with weight loss. I'm looking forward to 85% dark chocolate or a certain sauce or wine in my maintenance phase occasionally, but I don't want to get hooked on having a treat everyday. I want to stick to eating for hunger, not emotional reasons. 

 

This morning was my second cardio workout with my sister and it is really a fantastic way of starting the day. It helps me feel confident and like I'm doing everything in my power to support my weight loss. It also makes me hungrier throughout the day, but hungry for protein, not junk. I just find myself seeing how I can boost my protein intake at meals to help keep me satiated for longer. At lunch, I asked for a double serving of chicken on my salad and got the feta, and at dinner I ordered a side of chicken to go with my vegetable sushi. When my meals are the proper size, I don't even think about food in between meals. 

 

I really hate that I ate too much for so many years and now have to deal with all of this loose skin and weight loss, but my other option would have been to continue being overweight, unhappy, bloated, ashamed, and hopeless. I could have wasted my entire lifetime being overweight and miserable. I can't change the past, but I can get my body to a better place. And with all the tips I've learned from my sister this weekend, I'm realizing that it really doesn't have to be 4 hour workouts and total food deprivation. 

[Guest bfree11]

Day 84 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain Fage yogurt, berries, teaspoon of granola, black coffee

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, balsamic vinaigrette, feta, 1 small piece of pita, unsweetened iced tea

Dinner: sushi with avocado, cucumber, carrots, grilled chicken (no sauce)

Exercise: INSANITY Cardio, ran laps in the hotel hallways

 

Today I ate more things that aren't Whole 30. I had the teaspoon of granola again, the light feta (specifically asked for less) on my salad, a small piece of pita that came with the salad, and sushi, which had rice inside of it. I asked my sister permission before I made each of these decisions because I wanted to make sure that every meal I eat is conducive to weight loss. The fact that she gave me the green light on all of these things (and believe me, she's strict and disciplined) showed me that my meals can still be yummy and have elements of excitement. I've been so rigid with most grains and dairy, but my sister has helped me understand what a reasonable portion size looks like of these things when trying to lose weight. For example, the healthy, high protein, low sugar granola that I've been eating on this trip has a serving size of 1/4 cup. I've been having 1 tsp. That 1 tsp makes a HUGE difference in the flavor profile of my breakfast while hardly affecting my caloric intake for the day. I'm always focusing on how to get protein and veggies at lunch and dinner and as long as dairy or grains play a tiny role in the meal, then I can still lose weight. At breakfast, I don't focus so much on the veggie intake, but I'm always trying to pack in protein and fruit for energy. I look at food now and think, "what can this do for me?" I avoid sugar pretty much completely because it can't do anything to help me with weight loss. I'm looking forward to 85% dark chocolate or a certain sauce or wine in my maintenance phase occasionally, but I don't want to get hooked on having a treat everyday. I want to stick to eating for hunger, not emotional reasons. 

 

This morning was my second cardio workout with my sister and it is really a fantastic way of starting the day. It helps me feel confident and like I'm doing everything in my power to support my weight loss. It also makes me hungrier throughout the day, but hungry for protein, not junk. I just find myself seeing how I can boost my protein intake at meals to help keep me satiated for longer. At lunch, I asked for a double serving of chicken on my salad and got the feta, and at dinner I ordered a side of chicken to go with my vegetable sushi. When my meals are the proper size, I don't even think about food in between meals. 

 

I really hate that I ate too much for so many years and now have to deal with all of this loose skin and weight loss, but my other option would have been to continue being overweight, unhappy, bloated, ashamed, and hopeless. I could have wasted my entire lifetime being overweight and miserable. I can't change the past, but I can get my body to a better place. And with all the tips I've learned from my sister this weekend, I'm realizing that it really doesn't have to be 4 hour workouts and total food deprivation. 

[JcJimmy]

I am starting Day 1 and reading your posts inspires me.  What is so awesome is that you are not only changing your life in such a positive way but LOTS of others as well.

 

Thank you!

[Higgles]

I'm glad you're having so much fun with your sister... I did the insanity program for awhile, and omg I had to take breaks every 3 minutes it was tough. I did the P90x program a few years ago with a group of people at work, and no joke it wasn't as cardio intensive but I dropped weight, got strong, and even though I didn't run as much while I was doing it, I got the best run time on my run test ever. Recently I've been doing the p90x strength training workouts because I'm familiar with them but I'm not actually doing the whole program because I need to run more.

 

I have really been in a breakfast rut recently. Every day for work I have like a pre-made egg bake made with veggies. I've been doing this for years, and pre-W30 when I got bored I would go to D&D and get a bagel sandwich... well I'm not doing that anymore. So this weekend I made turkey meatballs with some onion, kale, red bell pepper and spices, and then I put a little spiced tomato sauce in a dish with the meatballs and that is my breakfast. I'm eating them right now and I love it. Now the two meatballs aren't enough for breakfast so I meant to make an egg with it, but I forgot yesterday so I grabbed two hardboiled eggs from the fridge and I have some blueberries and some avocado. I'm super proud of myself for making something new, and I'm determined to have a successful week. My biggest hurdle is dealing with the afternoon sugar cravings, because I've done so much off-track eating I'm no longer burning fat efficiently and I'm burning carbs again, so I need to stop feeding my body with them. Every morning I wake up and think I'll be successful and then I break for something sweet. Today, if I get that craving instead of turning to the office snack bar I will physically go to the store and get some pre-made hard boiled eggs.

 

I know your frustrated about your body, but be so proud that you were able to make such giant transformations in your habits! You can undo all the damage that has been done. I'm not 100% too sure about the surgical options after weight loss, but you're doing the right thing with losing the weight slow and doing strength training as well. I know its easier said than done, but don't get so obsessed with the cardio and calories. This whole forum is full of people who lost a ton of weight following the w30 principles. I don't know how many other threads on here you read, but Tom Denton lost all his weight over 14 months eating w30 and he seems to be pretty knowledgeable so I like reading his responses on posts, you should look around the success stories page as well

[Higgles]

I'm glad you're having so much fun with your sister... I did the insanity program for awhile, and omg I had to take breaks every 3 minutes it was tough. I did the P90x program a few years ago with a group of people at work, and no joke it wasn't as cardio intensive but I dropped weight, got strong, and even though I didn't run as much while I was doing it, I got the best run time on my run test ever. Recently I've been doing the p90x strength training workouts because I'm familiar with them but I'm not actually doing the whole program because I need to run more.

 

I have really been in a breakfast rut recently. Every day for work I have like a pre-made egg bake made with veggies. I've been doing this for years, and pre-W30 when I got bored I would go to D&D and get a bagel sandwich... well I'm not doing that anymore. So this weekend I made turkey meatballs with some onion, kale, red bell pepper and spices, and then I put a little spiced tomato sauce in a dish with the meatballs and that is my breakfast. I'm eating them right now and I love it. Now the two meatballs aren't enough for breakfast so I meant to make an egg with it, but I forgot yesterday so I grabbed two hardboiled eggs from the fridge and I have some blueberries and some avocado. I'm super proud of myself for making something new, and I'm determined to have a successful week. My biggest hurdle is dealing with the afternoon sugar cravings, because I've done so much off-track eating I'm no longer burning fat efficiently and I'm burning carbs again, so I need to stop feeding my body with them. Every morning I wake up and think I'll be successful and then I break for something sweet. Today, if I get that craving instead of turning to the office snack bar I will physically go to the store and get some pre-made hard boiled eggs.

 

I know your frustrated about your body, but be so proud that you were able to make such giant transformations in your habits! You can undo all the damage that has been done. I'm not 100% too sure about the surgical options after weight loss, but you're doing the right thing with losing the weight slow and doing strength training as well. I know its easier said than done, but don't get so obsessed with the cardio and calories. This whole forum is full of people who lost a ton of weight following the w30 principles. I don't know how many other threads on here you read, but Tom Denham lost all his weight over 14 months eating w30 and he seems to be pretty knowledgeable so I like reading his responses on posts, you should look around the success stories page as well

[Higgles]

I think this is the thread where Tom talked about his weight loss http://forum.whole9life.com/topic/30312-weight-loss-stall-after-whole30/.

 

Ok, I know I'm being overly optimistic when really you just want to complain, but for me... my common routine was lose weight, maintain for a minute, gain it all back. Like every time I'm losing weight. So the idea of it creeping off even if its slow, the fact that its not going back up to me is like yay, I'm doing something that works!

 

I'm mad at all the bad decisions I made as well, the idea that I've wanted the same thing for so many years but never did what I should have done to get there, kills me. Do I remember all the cookies I ate in my life? No... but I can sure tell you about when I couldn't fit in a dress for an event, so were those cookies worth it? Nope! But I'm trying so hard to just remember that when I'm tempted and think that one day I'll be able to share a before and after shot, or not even worry because I'm at a place where I'll be there rest of my life, and so will you!

[Guest bfree11]

I am starting Day 1 and reading your posts inspires me.  What is so awesome is that you are not only changing your life in such a positive way but LOTS of others as well.

 

Thank you!

Congratulations on starting this journey! Whole 30 put me on a track to a whole new, way better life! Thank you so much for reading! Please don't hesitate to ask if you have any questions about anything. Helping others is what makes this Whole 30 community so special. My favorite quote throughout this has been "eat like you love yourself!"

[Guest bfree11]

I think this is the thread where Tom talked about his weight loss http://forum.whole9life.com/topic/30312-weight-loss-stall-after-whole30/.

 

Ok, I know I'm being overly optimistic when really you just want to complain, but for me... my common routine was lose weight, maintain for a minute, gain it all back. Like every time I'm losing weight. So the idea of it creeping off even if its slow, the fact that its not going back up to me is like yay, I'm doing something that works!

 

I'm mad at all the bad decisions I made as well, the idea that I've wanted the same thing for so many years but never did what I should have done to get there, kills me. Do I remember all the cookies I ate in my life? No... but I can sure tell you about when I couldn't fit in a dress for an event, so were those cookies worth it? Nope! But I'm trying so hard to just remember that when I'm tempted and think that one day I'll be able to share a before and after shot, or not even worry because I'm at a place where I'll be there rest of my life, and so will you!

 

Thank you so much for sharing that thread! Wow! That put things in perspective and made me feel a lot better. I hope to be a moderator someday who has reached my goals and can help others reach theirs too! Nice job with switching up your breakfast routine, sounds yummy! I conquered my afternoon sugar dragon by eating a waaaay bigger lunch and drinking kombucha with lunch. I find the sweetness of the kombucha gives me the feeling of having a sweet treat. You're doing great!

[Guest bfree11]

Day 85 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain Fage yogurt, berries, teaspoon of granola, black coffee

Lunch: salad with veggies, seeds, balsamic and olive oil, 1 small piece of whole grain bread

Dinner: Quest protein bar

 

Exercise: a little bit of INSANITY Cardio, hotel circuit!

 

Day 85! Woohoo! That's 5 more days until I can take my 90 day before and after pictures and compare them to day 0, 30, and 60. These past 30 days feel like they've gone by really slow, but I've learned so much about myself and my journey. 

 

My day started with an amazing workout. I'm going to miss working out with my sister, but I'm so thankful for the time we got to spend working out together. We got to bond in a whole new way and she taught me so much about how to balance pushing myself to new limits while also listening to my body, all while having a blast! We started with an Insanity DVD, but it was hurting my back and I wasn't enjoying it. I spoke up and told my sister that I'd rather run, which I never would have done in the past. I can tell that I'm building a lot more confidence in situations like this where I see myself speak up and ask for what I need. My sister designed the coolest hotel circuit for us! We did a lap back and forth through the long hotel hallways, then ran up the stairs, and then repeated, all the way to the top. We did 3 rounds of this with push ups and sit ups between each set. I never thought I'd be able to do stuff like this! 

 

The rest of the day kind of became a blur to me because my sleepiness from 3 bad nights of sleep finally caught up with me. I was in a daze the rest of the day and didn't even have an appetite for dinner. I just wanted to get home and rest in my own bed. When I was about 45 min from home on my drive back, I started feeling pretty hungry. Of course I was passing all sorts of fast food restaurants. I thought to myself, "What if I just indulge? I won't tell anyone! Everyone deserves a treat once in a while, right?" These thoughts were coming because I was hungry and the most convenient, accessible thing was fast food. I dug deeper and realized that I didn't actually want fast food, I just wanted to stop feeling hungry. I know I set myself up for this one by not taking food with me on a 4 hour drive, but I just wanted to get on the road and get home. I finally decided that I wasn't up for a whole meal or anything, I just wanted some protein to satiate me. I stopped at a grocery store right by my house and grabbed a protein bar on the way home. It felt like a huge treat to me and it also satisfied my hunger. It was a weird day and I was just too tired to eat a whole big meal, so I think it was a reasonable way of making my hunger go away. I look forward to eating 3 nice, balanced meals tomorrow when I'm back in my routine!

 

I just need to keep on cruising and learn to have some patience. What I'm doing is working, it just takes time. I need to find a tiny way to make each meal exciting without going out of control, and I need to stay as active as possible. In a few months, I can revisit all of my loose skin concerns and see where I'm at, but for now, I just need to keep on truckin'.

 

I've talked a little bit about what it's like to start dating while in the midst of this transformation. Eating right and losing weight has given me the confidence I needed to get out there and go on a few dates. In the past, I've gained weight when I've started relationships because we would go out to eat a lot and just get comfortable and lazy. I have made a commitment to myself this time around not to lose myself and my goals in a relationship. This has showed me how important it is to me to be with someone who cares about their nutrition and exercise. This is a shared interest that I'd like to have with the person I decide to have a relationship with. 

 

The guy I'm currently dating is fit and muscular. He told me he recently lost 20 lb from cleaning up his diet. He meal preps once a week and uses healthy substitutions when cooking. He made a banana bread tonight because he had some brown bananas and his dad is coming to visit. He took is typical banana bread recipe and reduced the butter and substituted he sugar for a little honey. He also baked a ton of chicken for himself to eat throughout the week. He told me that he wants to get more serious about his fitness and is starting a new workout routine at the gym. He doesn't really have weight to lose, but he wants to get more toned and fit. I was so excited to hear all of this from him tonight! I talked to him a lot about my lifestyle on our first few dates and he saw me make healthy choices on our dates while he made not so healthy choices. Now after a few days away, I came back and he has decided to put more effort into living a healthy lifestyle, like me! He said he'd love to workout with me and cook with me too! What a relief. It's so nice to be dating someone who understands the importance of healthy eating and exercising and is motivated to make it a priority. I'd like to think that I may have inspired him a little

 

Starting a new relationship with more self-confidence and a stronger idea of who I am and what I'm about feels so much better than the dating I've done in the past. I've been super open about my feelings and what I need from him and he's been great about listening and supporting me. Eating clean and exercising has made my life so much better!

[Guest bfree11]

Day 85 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain Fage yogurt, berries, teaspoon of granola, black coffee

Lunch: salad with veggies, seeds, balsamic and olive oil, 1 small piece of whole grain bread

Dinner: Quest protein bar

 

Exercise: a little bit of INSANITY Cardio, hotel circuit!

 

Day 85! Woohoo! That's 5 more days until I can take my 90 day before and after pictures and compare them to day 0, 30, and 60. These past 30 days feel like they've gone by really slow, but I've learned so much about myself and my journey. 

 

My day started with an amazing workout. I'm going to miss working out with my sister, but I'm so thankful for the time we got to spend working out together. We got to bond in a whole new way and she taught me so much about how to balance pushing myself to new limits while also listening to my body, all while having a blast! We started with an Insanity DVD, but it was hurting my back and I wasn't enjoying it. I spoke up and told my sister that I'd rather run, which I never would have done in the past. I can tell that I'm building a lot more confidence in situations like this where I see myself speak up and ask for what I need. My sister designed the coolest hotel circuit for us! We did a lap back and forth through the long hotel hallways, then ran up the stairs, and then repeated, all the way to the top. We did 3 rounds of this with push ups and sit ups between each set. I never thought I'd be able to do stuff like this! 

 

The rest of the day kind of became a blur to me because my sleepiness from 3 bad nights of sleep finally caught up with me. I was in a daze the rest of the day and didn't even have an appetite for dinner. I just wanted to get home and rest in my own bed. When I was about 45 min from home on my drive back, I started feeling pretty hungry. Of course I was passing all sorts of fast food restaurants. I thought to myself, "What if I just indulge? I won't tell anyone! Everyone deserves a treat once in a while, right?" These thoughts were coming because I was hungry and the most convenient, accessible thing was fast food. I dug deeper and realized that I didn't actually want fast food, I just wanted to stop feeling hungry. I know I set myself up for this one by not taking food with me on a 4 hour drive, but I just wanted to get on the road and get home. I finally decided that I wasn't up for a whole meal or anything, I just wanted some protein to satiate me. I stopped at a grocery store right by my house and grabbed a protein bar on the way home. It felt like a huge treat to me and it also satisfied my hunger. It was a weird day and I was just too tired to eat a whole big meal, so I think it was a reasonable way of making my hunger go away. I look forward to eating 3 nice, balanced meals tomorrow when I'm back in my routine!

 

I just need to keep on cruising and learn to have some patience. What I'm doing is working, it just takes time. I need to find a tiny way to make each meal exciting without going out of control, and I need to stay as active as possible. In a few months, I can revisit all of my loose skin concerns and see where I'm at, but for now, I just need to keep on truckin'.

 

I've talked a little bit about what it's like to start dating while in the midst of this transformation. Eating right and losing weight has given me the confidence I needed to get out there and go on a few dates. In the past, I've gained weight when I've started relationships because we would go out to eat a lot and just get comfortable and lazy. I have made a commitment to myself this time around not to lose myself and my goals in a relationship. This has showed me how important it is to me to be with someone who cares about their nutrition and exercise. This is a shared interest that I'd like to have with the person I decide to have a relationship with. 

 

The guy I'm currently dating is fit and muscular. He told me he recently lost 20 lb from cleaning up his diet. He meal preps once a week and uses healthy substitutions when cooking. He made a banana bread tonight because he had some brown bananas and his dad is coming to visit. He took is typical banana bread recipe and reduced the butter and substituted he sugar for a little honey. He also baked a ton of chicken for himself to eat throughout the week. He told me that he wants to get more serious about his fitness and is starting a new workout routine at the gym. He doesn't really have weight to lose, but he wants to get more toned and fit. I was so excited to hear all of this from him tonight! I talked to him a lot about my lifestyle on our first few dates and he saw me make healthy choices on our dates while he made not so healthy choices. Now after a few days away, I came back and he has decided to put more effort into living a healthy lifestyle, like me! He said he'd love to workout with me and cook with me too! What a relief. It's so nice to be dating someone who understands the importance of healthy eating and exercising and is motivated to make it a priority. I'd like to think that I may have inspired him a little 

 

Starting a new relationship with more self-confidence and a stronger idea of who I am and what I'm about feels so much better than the dating I've done in the past. I've been super open about my feelings and what I need from him and he's been great about listening and supporting me. Eating clean and exercising has made my life so much better!

[Higgles]

Yesterday I didn't feel too great. I had some rice the day before, and I thought I was ok with rice but my belly felt off within 30 minutes of eating. So I had more with my leftovers and again my belly rumbled for some time. I don't think it was just the rice though, I think my body is detoxing from crap from the weekend, so I'm somewhat glad I felt like crap, because it means that I stopped giving my body crap and I need to realize what I'm doing to myself. I didn't break down and have sweets yesterday, I was so proud! However, by the time I got home my head was killing me... once I get home I can resist my husbands snacks a lot easier than the snack bar at work. I just drank some water and pathetically laid on the couch.

I still got up to run this morning, I didn't feel 100% but I'm glad I went anyway. My time was super slow and a small dog snuck up on me that I shrieked loudly and then sprinted down the street. Luckily it was so early no one heard me but it took me forever to catch my breath again that I actually stopped to walk twice. I also realized that my upper body was a bit sore, I forgot I increased my weight on my strength training yesterday, winning!

 

I'm determined today to again resist snacks... I have a big carnitas salad ready for me (hubs made carnitas last night, they are to die for, and w30 compliant!), plus avocado and a hard boiled egg. Yesterday I made tea in the afternoon to help cravings. Its been so hot in Germany this summer I haven't wanted something like tea but its been rainy and overcast so I think tea is going to become a regular occurrence again.

 

I'm so glad you've had some successful dates with this guy, I wish that my husband was more active. Although, he said he would start bike riding with me so I'll have to give him that. I'm also finding ways to have fun with new people that won't derail all my efforts. This weekend, my husband was having so much fun with this group of guys that I stopped drinking wine so I could be the DD (hubs always drives bc he doesn't like my driving style, lol). Typically, I'm the lush who keeps up with everyone else, but I was totally fine sipping wine and just hanging out. I just need to be very aware of what I'm ordering when we go out as we eat out more often when we travel and if its becoming a part of our normal routine I can't treat them like special occasions.

[Guest bfree11]

Yesterday I didn't feel too great. I had some rice the day before, and I thought I was ok with rice but my belly felt off within 30 minutes of eating. So I had more with my leftovers and again my belly rumbled for some time. I don't think it was just the rice though, I think my body is detoxing from crap from the weekend, so I'm somewhat glad I felt like crap, because it means that I stopped giving my body crap and I need to realize what I'm doing to myself. I didn't break down and have sweets yesterday, I was so proud! However, by the time I got home my head was killing me... once I get home I can resist my husbands snacks a lot easier than the snack bar at work. I just drank some water and pathetically laid on the couch.

I still got up to run this morning, I didn't feel 100% but I'm glad I went anyway. My time was super slow and a small dog snuck up on me that I shrieked loudly and then sprinted down the street. Luckily it was so early no one heard me but it took me forever to catch my breath again that I actually stopped to walk twice. I also realized that my upper body was a bit sore, I forgot I increased my weight on my strength training yesterday, winning!

 

I'm determined today to again resist snacks... I have a big carnitas salad ready for me (hubs made carnitas last night, they are to die for, and w30 compliant!), plus avocado and a hard boiled egg. Yesterday I made tea in the afternoon to help cravings. Its been so hot in Germany this summer I haven't wanted something like tea but its been rainy and overcast so I think tea is going to become a regular occurrence again.

 

I'm so glad you've had some successful dates with this guy, I wish that my husband was more active. Although, he said he would start bike riding with me so I'll have to give him that. I'm also finding ways to have fun with new people that won't derail all my efforts. This weekend, my husband was having so much fun with this group of guys that I stopped drinking wine so I could be the DD (hubs always drives bc he doesn't like my driving style, lol). Typically, I'm the lush who keeps up with everyone else, but I was totally fine sipping wine and just hanging out. I just need to be very aware of what I'm ordering when we go out as we eat out more often when we travel and if its becoming a part of our normal routine I can't treat them like special occasions.

Sounds like a good size lunch! How were your cravings this afternoon? Awesome idea to be the DD, I love that!

[Guest bfree11]

Day 86 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain siggi yogurt, berries, chia seeds, 2 eggs, black coffee

Lunch: veggie & avocado sushi roll, kombucha

Dinner: glass sweet potato noodles, kale slaw, BBQ chicken, broccoli

Exercise: Rest day, but very active day at work!

 

I had some tummy issues for most of the day due to a medication I took last night to help me get a little more regular... it definitely worked! I ate a normal breakfast, but at lunch time, my stomach felt so gurgly and I reaaally wanted something besides a salad. I got a little sushi roll with no sauce. I think the rice actually help my stomach a bit. For dinner, I went to my favorite heathy restaurant, Fresh Kitchen and had a nice clean meal. Someone at work today offered everyone in the office some candy and I immediately shouted out, "No way! That's not healthy!" He laughed and said that he of course, knew I'd say no. I like being known as someone who only eats healthy! It feels really good to know that people associate me with healthiness! 

 

This morning, I quickly threw on a skirt and went to work. As I walked from my car to my office, I realized that my skirt was pretty loose. My friend who's about 15 lb behind me in her weight loss journey keeps begging me to mail her all of my big clothes and go shopping for new stuff. Most of my clothes are a size 14 and I'm swimming in them. I told her that I'm too afraid to let go of them because what if I mess up and need them again!? She assured me that it would never happen, but even if it did, she'd just mail me back the clothes! I have been putting off buying any new clothes until I reach my final goal. I didn't want to waste money on clothes now that will be too big soon, but my friend convinced me that buying a few things wasn't such a crazy idea. 

 

After work I went to the mall. I walked around (while trying to hold up my loose skirt) and realized that I had no idea which store to go to! I wanted something inexpensive since these clothes will only be needed temporarily. I went to H&M, Old Navy, and Target. I'm used to always shopping at Old Navy and Target for their inexpensive clothes and plus size section, but H&M was new. I felt really insecure when looking at their clothes and was too nervous to try anything on. I rushed to Old Navy where I felt more comfortable. I grabbed a bunch of things to try on, but I noticed that I kept grabbing the baggiest, loosest clothing that covered my arms and my belly. I was brave though and picked up a pair of size 10 skinny jeans to try on. They looked TINY, but my size 12 stuff is getting a little loose and I was curious! They were definitely tight, but I got them buttoned!

 

I didn't end up buying any clothes at any of the stores... I didn't see anything I loved and I want to look thorough what I have at home more closely. It was still really exciting and interesting! I'm going to give myself a little more time to think about what I really need/want and then I'll go back and pick up a few things. I can't wait to be swimming in size 10 jeans someday!

[Guest bfree11]

Day 86 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain siggi yogurt, berries, chia seeds, 2 eggs, black coffee

Lunch: veggie & avocado sushi roll, kombucha

Dinner: glass sweet potato noodles, kale slaw, BBQ chicken, broccoli

Exercise: Rest day, but very active day at work!

 

I had some tummy issues for most of the day due to a medication I took last night to help me get a little more regular... it definitely worked! I ate a normal breakfast, but at lunch time, my stomach felt so gurgly and I reaaally wanted something besides a salad. I got a little sushi roll with no sauce. I think the rice actually help my stomach a bit. For dinner, I went to my favorite heathy restaurant, Fresh Kitchen and had a nice clean meal. Someone at work today offered everyone in the office some candy and I immediately shouted out, "No way! That's not healthy!" He laughed and said that he of course, knew I'd say no. I like being known as someone who only eats healthy! It feels really good to know that people associate me with healthiness! 

 

This morning, I quickly threw on a skirt and went to work. As I walked from my car to my office, I realized that my skirt was pretty loose. My friend who's about 15 lb behind me in her weight loss journey keeps begging me to mail her all of my big clothes and go shopping for new stuff. Most of my clothes are a size 14 and I'm swimming in them. I told her that I'm too afraid to let go of them because what if I mess up and need them again!? She assured me that it would never happen, but even if it did, she'd just mail me back the clothes! I have been putting off buying any new clothes until I reach my final goal. I didn't want to waste money on clothes now that will be too big soon, but my friend convinced me that buying a few things wasn't such a crazy idea. 

 

After work I went to the mall. I walked around (while trying to hold up my loose skirt) and realized that I had no idea which store to go to! I wanted something inexpensive since these clothes will only be needed temporarily. I went to H&M, Old Navy, and Target. I'm used to always shopping at Old Navy and Target for their inexpensive clothes and plus size section, but H&M was new. I felt really insecure when looking at their clothes and was too nervous to try anything on. I rushed to Old Navy where I felt more comfortable. I grabbed a bunch of things to try on, but I noticed that I kept grabbing the baggiest, loosest clothing that covered my arms and my belly. I was brave though and picked up a pair of size 10 skinny jeans to try on. They looked TINY, but my size 12 stuff is getting a little loose and I was curious! They were definitely tight, but I got them buttoned!

 

I didn't end up buying any clothes at any of the stores... I didn't see anything I loved and I want to look thorough what I have at home more closely. It was still really exciting and interesting! I'm going to give myself a little more time to think about what I really need/want and then I'll go back and pick up a few things. I can't wait to be swimming in size 10 jeans someday!

[Higgles]

That's so great that you need to buy new clothes! I mean, spending money isn't always the best, but the fact that your old clothes are falling off of you is a great sign. I also told myself that I didn't want to spend money on new clothes until I'm smaller, BUT I had a go-to pair of jeans that were awkwardly falling down so I invested in a pair or two of new jeans (and shorts) to help me transition. I find that Gap jeans fit me well It may be because I'm tall. I like express clothes but their jeans never fit me quite right. I honestly can't think of where else are good places to buy something like jeans. I'm flying back to the states next month for a work event and I plan on hitting the mall to look for a few things, shopping in Europe is a bit different.

 

Here is my personal opinion on why you should get rid of your clothes that are too big. We all have the fear of gaining the weight back. but you don't go to bed a size 10 and wake up a 14 again, so the tightening of jeans is the reminder that hey I need to watch what I'm doing. If you don't have bigger jeans to change into, then you know you need to make some changes. I do think that keeping some jeans of varying sizes helps, because sometimes we're a bit bloaty and need something a bit looser. For some reason I kept some dresses that are at least a size or two too big on me, because I liked them and I'm pickier about dresses then I am about jeans. But I realized these things don't look right, and unless I'm going to get them tailored down they're going away. Shirts I think can transition sizes pretty well, so it takes me longer before I "need" new shirts, so I plan on waiting until I'm closer to my goal to get some more other stuff.

 

Yesterday I resisted the snack bar again, yay, but I definitely ate an entire avocado throughout the day. I brought another one with me today and we'll see if the increased fat is helping. Today is a busy day so I'm hoping I just won't think about food as much. I did jump on the scale again today and normally I only do it on Sundays now but I wanted to feel some  validation. My weight had crept up a bit since we ended our w30, and I wanted to see if I was back down and I was, 1 lb, which is good enough for the short term knowing it will continue to go down again as long as I stick with it!

[Guest bfree11]

That's so great that you need to buy new clothes! I mean, spending money isn't always the best, but the fact that your old clothes are falling off of you is a great sign. I also told myself that I didn't want to spend money on new clothes until I'm smaller, BUT I had a go-to pair of jeans that were awkwardly falling down so I invested in a pair or two of new jeans (and shorts) to help me transition. I find that Gap jeans fit me well It may be because I'm tall. I like express clothes but their jeans never fit me quite right. I honestly can't think of where else are good places to buy something like jeans. I'm flying back to the states next month for a work event and I plan on hitting the mall to look for a few things, shopping in Europe is a bit different.

 

Here is my personal opinion on why you should get rid of your clothes that are too big. We all have the fear of gaining the weight back. but you don't go to bed a size 10 and wake up a 14 again, so the tightening of jeans is the reminder that hey I need to watch what I'm doing. If you don't have bigger jeans to change into, then you know you need to make some changes. I do think that keeping some jeans of varying sizes helps, because sometimes we're a bit bloaty and need something a bit looser. For some reason I kept some dresses that are at least a size or two too big on me, because I liked them and I'm pickier about dresses then I am about jeans. But I realized these things don't look right, and unless I'm going to get them tailored down they're going away. Shirts I think can transition sizes pretty well, so it takes me longer before I "need" new shirts, so I plan on waiting until I'm closer to my goal to get some more other stuff.

 

Yesterday I resisted the snack bar again, yay, but I definitely ate an entire avocado throughout the day. I brought another one with me today and we'll see if the increased fat is helping. Today is a busy day so I'm hoping I just won't think about food as much. I did jump on the scale again today and normally I only do it on Sundays now but I wanted to feel some  validation. My weight had crept up a bit since we ended our w30, and I wanted to see if I was back down and I was, 1 lb, which is good enough for the short term knowing it will continue to go down again as long as I stick with it!

COngrats on being a pound down! That shows that you're back in control. I think eating a whole avocado is a great idea. I hope that helps with cravings! So proud of you for resisting the snack bar 2 days in a row. I LOVE the point you made about the fact that I'm not going to be a size 10 and then wake up a size 14! That makes so much sense.

[Guest bfree11]

Day 87 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain siggi yogurt, berries, chia seeds, tablespoon of Bear Naked granola, black coffee

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, nuts, seeds, 1/2 avocado, balsamic, olive oil, 1/2 of a spinach millet & flax pita, kombucha

Chocolate Taste Testing: 3 tiny squares! 

Dinner: 2 eggs, goat cheese, onions, broccoli

Exercise: Rest day again (felt out of it today)

 

Last night, I tried on all of my clothes and made a giant pile of clothes that were too big for me to mail to my friend. The pile was huge! I found that smalls, mediums, and most size 12s fit, but the L, XL, 14s and 16s were all too big. There were certain things that were hard to let go of, but then I remembered that they'd be in good hands and I could always borrow it again if I wanted to. I had a big fear of letting go of the clothes that are too big for me because what if I need them again? But when I think rationally, I'm not going to go to sleep a size 10 and wake up a size 14! I'd gradually notice my clothes getting tighter and I'd have to clean up my diet. I wouldn't need clothes 2 sizes too big!

 

I packed up all of my big clothes in a big box and it was so awkward to carry and SO heavy. My guess was that it was about 60 lb of clothes. However, when I brought it to FedEx this morning, it was actually only 35 lb! I stood there, staring that the number 35 on the scale below my big box of big clothes, and it felt really symbolic. I probably have about 35 lb to lose until I reach my goal, and here I was, getting rid of exactly 35 lb of clothes that were too big for me. It was cool to see the 35 lb right in front of me. I think letting go of these clothes was the first step in my letting go of my 35 lb!

 

I went to bed late last night and didn't get much sleep, so I decided to just workout after work. I knew I'd miss yoga today because of a late meeting, but I thought I'd at least go on an evening run. I added the granola that my sister shared with my to my breakfast this morning. I was worried that I'd be tempted to snack on it if it was in the house, but I don't feel tempted at all! I haven't "snacked" in so long that it doesn't feel natural anymore. It made my breakfast so delicious and exciting! A little while after I got to work, I suddenly felt EXHAUSTED. I don't know if it was because I skipped the eggs in my breakfast or because I got a little less sleep than usual, but I kept zoning out and my eyes kept closing. Was it a sugar crash from the granola? I doubt it. I had a small portion and there's not much sugar in it anyway.

 

I added the 1/2 of a millet & flax wrap to my salad to see if eating a little more would wake me up a bit. It didn't. Later in the afternoon, I was still so sleepy and suddenly had the urge to eat 85% dark chocolate. I thought about doing it, but then stopped myself. Coincidentally, a few hours later, a chocolate shipment of Mast Brothers chocolates came in that I had ordered for the store. This is a very unique chocolate company and they told me they'd send me samples of their 4 new flavors. I placed the order about a month ago and I told myself that I'd allow myself to taste the new flavors when the chocolate came. How funny that it came on the day that I randomly wanted chocolate. The 4 flavors were: vanilla & smoke, cow's milk, goat's milk, and sheep's milk. I skipped the cow's milk because that's not very unique, but I did try a square of the other 3. The squares are super small. I didn't like any of them and didn't feel tempted to eat more. In the past I would have kept snacking on it! I didn't give the chocolate my power. I was curious what it tasted like, I had a taste, and then I moved on. 

 

I'm not sure why I was so off today. All I wanted to do was sleep. Zero energy. I'm going to get lots of sleep tonight and run in the morning!

[Guest bfree11]

Day 87 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain siggi yogurt, berries, chia seeds, tablespoon of Bear Naked granola, black coffee

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, nuts, seeds, 1/2 avocado, balsamic, olive oil, 1/2 of a spinach millet & flax pita, kombucha

Chocolate Taste Testing: 3 tiny squares!  

Dinner: 2 eggs, goat cheese, onions, broccoli

Exercise: Rest day again (felt out of it today)

 

Last night, I tried on all of my clothes and made a giant pile of clothes that were too big for me to mail to my friend. The pile was huge! I found that smalls, mediums, and most size 12s fit, but the L, XL, 14s and 16s were all too big. There were certain things that were hard to let go of, but then I remembered that they'd be in good hands and I could always borrow it again if I wanted to. I had a big fear of letting go of the clothes that are too big for me because what if I need them again? But when I think rationally, I'm not going to go to sleep a size 10 and wake up a size 14! I'd gradually notice my clothes getting tighter and I'd have to clean up my diet. I wouldn't need clothes 2 sizes too big!

 

I packed up all of my big clothes in a big box and it was so awkward to carry and SO heavy. My guess was that it was about 60 lb of clothes. However, when I brought it to FedEx this morning, it was actually only 35 lb! I stood there, staring that the number 35 on the scale below my big box of big clothes, and it felt really symbolic. I probably have about 35 lb to lose until I reach my goal, and here I was, getting rid of exactly 35 lb of clothes that were too big for me. It was cool to see the 35 lb right in front of me. I think letting go of these clothes was the first step in my letting go of my 35 lb!

 

I went to bed late last night and didn't get much sleep, so I decided to just workout after work. I knew I'd miss yoga today because of a late meeting, but I thought I'd at least go on an evening run. I added the granola that my sister shared with my to my breakfast this morning. I was worried that I'd be tempted to snack on it if it was in the house, but I don't feel tempted at all! I haven't "snacked" in so long that it doesn't feel natural anymore. It made my breakfast so delicious and exciting! A little while after I got to work, I suddenly felt EXHAUSTED. I don't know if it was because I skipped the eggs in my breakfast or because I got a little less sleep than usual, but I kept zoning out and my eyes kept closing. Was it a sugar crash from the granola? I doubt it. I had a small portion and there's not much sugar in it anyway.

 

I added the 1/2 of a millet & flax wrap to my salad to see if eating a little more would wake me up a bit. It didn't. Later in the afternoon, I was still so sleepy and suddenly had the urge to eat 85% dark chocolate. I thought about doing it, but then stopped myself. Coincidentally, a few hours later, a chocolate shipment of Mast Brothers chocolates came in that I had ordered for the store. This is a very unique chocolate company and they told me they'd send me samples of their 4 new flavors. I placed the order about a month ago and I told myself that I'd allow myself to taste the new flavors when the chocolate came. How funny that it came on the day that I randomly wanted chocolate. The 4 flavors were: vanilla & smoke, cow's milk, goat's milk, and sheep's milk. I skipped the cow's milk because that's not very unique, but I did try a square of the other 3. The squares are super small. I didn't like any of them and didn't feel tempted to eat more. In the past I would have kept snacking on it! I didn't give the chocolate my power. I was curious what it tasted like, I had a taste, and then I moved on. 

 

I'm not sure why I was so off today. All I wanted to do was sleep. Zero energy. I'm going to get lots of sleep tonight and run in the morning!

[Higgles]

First, congrats on clearing out your closet! I hope that ends up being a big motivator for you. One of my motivators was going to sign up for the stylist program, "stitch fix." I don't know if you've ever heard of it, but you log your sizes and info about your style, you can link pinterest boards to your profile and a stylist will pick out 5 items for you each month and mail them to you. You have like 3 days to try them on and send them back if you don't like them. I did this for a bit and loved it, the program itself costs $20, but if you buy something they take that off the price of the item, and very rarely did I not pick something out. I always had a lot of fun with it and decided that when I drop some more weight I want to sign up for it again. Although I don't mind going out and shopping, I don't think I have good style and would love someone to help me find cute outfits, lol.

 

I got a deep tissue massage yesterday to try to help alleviate some of my back/hip issues. Omg, I've gotten massages before but none like this, this woman meant business. She warned me that I would probably be a bit sore last night and this morning and she was right. My chiropractor thought it would be a good idea for me to start doing massages in between chiro appointments and then we could go longer in between each session. I sound like such an old lady by having all these appointments, but honestly, it wasn't until I was older that I realized how important some of this stuff is. If I had only spent a bit of money taking care of myself when I was younger, I may not be like I am now. I always viewed massages as a luxury or something you do for Valentines day, but in reality, massage is a therapy for your body if it needs it.

 

When I woke up this morning I was a bit sore and hung around the house trying to think if I wanted to run or not. I decided against it and justified it to myself... for some reason I ran super slow on Tuesday and I was like man I'll run even slower today, I'll give myself the day off. My husband woke up before I left the house and his reaction was, " Oh you ran slow on Tuesday? Well you know what they say, if you're bad at something you might as well give up. That's what they say right? not that you should keep going so you get better?" He was being super sarcastic to make me laugh, but it made me think about the fine line between giving yourself a break because you need it, or babying yourself. Sometimes I think I have an issue working between the two. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, which is probably the reason I have tears and joints and keep working through them, but then sometimes because I know I have injuries I babied myself too much and fell deeply out of shape. In the end, I'm not going to beat myself up for not running today, but maybe I could have went to the gym and jumped on the elliptical... a little bit is better than nothing. But I didn't even think of that option until I'm typing this out. Boo... I'll have to make it up somehow tomorrow...

 

3 days straight with no snackbar... I don't plan on hitting it today and I feel great. I've stayed on plan all week, I did have a bit of my husbands risotto last night, but I could see that being a slippery slope so I packed all this leftovers away before I took too many other bites. However, I asked him to roast some extra veggies for me that I could keep up all week as a side dish, and he did so that was awesome. He cut up an eggplant, squash, sweet potato, red onion and mushrooms. They weren't as "roasted" after being reheated, but it filled my plate and he ate his rice side dish in peace. This is the first time this has happened, up until now he has REFUSED to eat a carb side even though he wants one because he wants me to eat it with him. I told him probably 1001 times that he can eat it and I won't mind at all. He finally did it and I was so happy, but I didn't make a big deal out of it. The rest of the meal was entirely the same so we both walked away happy, yay for the win!

[Guest bfree11]

Day 88 (of healthy eating)

 

Breakfast: plain siggi yogurt, berries, chia seeds, 1/3 cup of granola (still a small portion, but more than usual, not sure why I did it...), black coffee

Lunch: salad with chicken, veggies, nuts, seeds, 1/2 avocado, balsamic, olive oil, whole spinach millet & flax pita, kombucha

Dinner: chicken, tomato sauce, 1/2 red bell pepper

Exercise: Rest day again (so sleepy!)

 

I took another rest day today because I felt drowsy and bloated all day again. I'm not sure what's up with me, but I just feel sleepy and weak. The thought of exercising seemed miserable, which is not how I typically feel about workouts, especially yoga. I felt a strong guilt all day about not working out, but my body was telling me to rest, so I listened. I'm hoping I get out of this funk soon. Is it the extra carbs from the granola and the millet & flax wrap? Is it because I skipped eggs and had a smaller breakfast? I'm not sure. My plan for tomorrow is to have a little less granola with my yogurt and add 2 eggs. Then at lunch, I'm not going to have the wrap with my salad. I hope to be in the mood to do something active tomorrow after work!

 

Sleepiness historically has triggered snacking for me. If I'm tired, I crave sugar and snacks. I saw that happening to me yesterday with the chocolate, but I managed to not spiral out of control and kept my chocolate intake to just a taste. Today, I didn't have any sugar or snack cravings despite how tired and drained I felt. At Whole Foods, I thought about picking up a dark chocolate bar or Arctic Zero ice cream, but now when I have thoughts about food, I don't necessarily act on them. I had the thought, and then moved on and didn't buy any treats. 

 

For dinner, I cooked a chicken breast and heated up some tomato sauce to put on top. I had some goat cheese in the fridge and thought about putting that on top as well. I took it out and almost went through with it, but then stopped myself. I remember feeling like the goat cheese made my stomach a little grumbly the night before and I didn't want to feel this way after dinner once again. Without a second thought, I grabbed the goat cheese, and threw it in the trash (the Best By date was 2 days away anyway). 1. I can't believe I had cheese in my house for so long without binge eating it. It must have been there for a month. 2. I'm totally being more mindful about what I'm putting in my body, how I suspect it will make me feel, and if it's really worth it to me to eat. The emotional connection to food is dwindling. Sure, I walked by someone eating french fries today and thought "mmm I want one!" but then I just moved on and forgot all about them. 

 

At lunch, my friend was having a deli sandwich on a big sub roll with cheese and a bag of chips. She kept saying, "You're eating so healthy and I'm eating like crap, don't judge me!' I told her that it's her body, her choice and what she chooses isn't my business. Sometimes people almost feel threatened by the healthy choices I make. It makes them feel guilty about what they are choosing to eat. The more I look around, the people eating junk food are overweight and I'm just not interested in being overweight anymore. It's so hard to get onto the healthy eating wagon and it's even harder to stay on without falling off, but the confidence that committing to this has given me is huge. I've held on for 88 days now because eating healthy and staying active (besides the past 3 days  ) has made me like myself more. I enjoy my company more. I feel better in my skin. I see weight loss progress. The longer you resist junk food, the less important it becomes. I've emotionally detached from it at this point.

 

I remember my old behaviors vividly and I can completely see why I gained so much weight over time. I snacked and snacked and snacked, without even realizing I was doing it! The food in my kitchen would call to me. One handful would become the entire box in a matter of minutes. When I was sad, bored, or tired, I found happiness in food. I found comfort in restaurants and takeout. I found excitement in ordering all of the yummy things I wanted. I'd get an urge for something, think about it all day, and then treat myself to it. Sure there were stomach aches, regret, bloating, and shame, but when the negative consequences came, I turned to even more food to make it feel better. Even if I was super full and not hungry at all! Tonight, I almost ate the entire chicken breast, but there were 2 pieces left at the end that I was trying to decide what to do with. My immediate reaction was to quickly shove them in my mouth and get it over with so that I didn't have to throw away food. But then I thought about it... I wasn't hungry anymore and how big of a deal is it really to throw two small pieces of chicken in my garbage? But, it wasn't enough to be worth saving for leftovers, so why not just finish it so it doesn't go to waste? Why not?! Because I'm NOT hungry anymore, that's why! I was proud of myself for working through this one and seeing the light. It's definitely harder to stop myself when eating something more desirable like dairy or grains, but mindfulness is the answer. We need to truly think about what we put in our bodies. Every bite.