Let's get ready to Ruuuuuuuuuuumble! (A Log)

[Janette]

Day 90: To Macaroon, or Not to Macaroon?

Going to my neighbors' house for a Christmas dinner tonight. She's making her famous macaroons. Do I? Don't I? Am I only sticking to the Whole30 so I can see "Day 100" on January 1? (Lovely how that worked out.) Will my in-laws be annoyed that I specifically asked them not to bring my favorite macaroons from France, and then I go and eat macaroons anyway?

I think this may be the most first-world problem I've ever faced!

Felt much better yesterday (just in time for a last minute clean-up blitz) and went dancing! Woo-hoo! It was an evening of 5Rhythms, which WIkipedia describes as "a movement meditation practice...[that] draws from indigenous and world traditions using tenets of shamanistic, ecstatic, mystical and eastern philosophy." I danced like a maniac, and it released ALL the tension in my body. Ahhhhhhhhhh.

I'm working with a Paleo nutritionist now, so that I can effectively solve my gas issue and go back to have more food options. My first task is do a food journal for 5 days, including what I ate, how much, when, where, and how I felt before and after. Not sure whether I can commit to it while family's visiting. I guess I could just carry a little notebook with me.

I realized yesterday that I might need to take a break from kale and collard greens. Mean, stupid FODMAPs!!!! They were kind of my go-to veggies - if I couldn't think of what vegetables to have with my meal, I'd just pull some out of the freezer and add it to a hash or make a smoothie. I guess I can substitute spinach, but I think I'm supposed to limit it because of its high oxalic acid content.

Food

Meal 1: bison, kale, eggs, manna, blueberries

Meal 2: Roast chicken, salad, tomatoes, olives, carrot, manna, blueberries

Meal 3: Chicken Soup

[SarahEmily]

Hey atleast you can look on the plus side, that its going to be much easier to figure out whats causing problems since you are only eating a smaller variety of foods (when compared to an average diet w/ gluten/dairy/alcohol/sugar)!!

[Janette]

It's true. And it's nice to not be so gassy anymore, especially with all this extra socializing!

Turned out to not be any macaroons last night anyway - doh! So I made it to day 91. Went to the experimental sushi place for dinner and was seriously tempted. But I stuck to sashimi and wilted spinach. The restaurant is only 4 blocks away, so really, it can wait until I'm done with my Whole100.

[Janette]

Day 93: Merry Christmas!!!!

Oooo, I do love Christmas! Lights and treats and family and gifts - what's not to love?

Having a dangerous moment right now, though. My willpower has been weakening, everyone is at Christmas dinner but me (I'm waiting for the baby to wake up), I'm surrounded by treats, and I'm bored! A sugar binge sounds really fun right now. Instead, I'm distracting myself with tea, writing here, and I'll be Skyping my family in California in a minute.

But Oh! the siren song of chocolate and marzipan!!!!

[melbournegirl]

Plug your ears LOL... Dont tell me kale is high fodmap? Its not on my list.... or maybe I didnt look closely. I am trying to be much stricter now for fodmaps but I was enjoying kale occasionally as a novelty (oven baked with spice)

[Aberrantatavia]

What a wonderful journal!

I remember being sleep deprived with a little one, and with a less than 2 yr old in the house, and a husband who only came home on the weekends. We heated the house with coal, so there was that to tend to, and I didn't have a car. She was born in December, so it's not like I could wander into town, which was a little bit away. My husband had just started a new job, so we didn't have much money. Oh and my baby was very sick. Her kidneys were not functioning correctly, and she had to have her system reconstructed once she was old enough. But as a new baby, they didn't want to fix it. This was the dawn of my real health consciousness. Oh, and she wouldn't leave my side. For 2 years. She would scream if she wasn't attached to me. You know how you never take your hands off your kid in the cart in the grocery store. I didn't worry to much about that, no one would have taken Hannah. Seriously, it was not a fun time.

At the time, it was very trying. I don't recall doing it with as much grace as you seem to. But I did learn a lot. About me, about what's important in life, about all kinds of things.

And it's funny, but that baby is now 20 and until I was reading your journal, I had forgotten all of the details of how life was then. She outgrew needing to be with me, I let it run its course. She's a happy, healthy, secure and wonderful young woman with all of the gifts and qualities God granted her and allowed me the privilege to foster in her.

Just do the next thing.

Eating well and clean will, in the long run, give you a mental clarity that you wouldn't have with sugar and goop clogging up your brain.

Thanks for sharing your journey!

[Janette]

WOW! Thank you for sharing that. That really pulled me out of my funk! That sound like a very challenging time, with no breaks in the relentless caregiving. And to hear that now you never even think about that time...it gives me a whole lot of perspective.

Now I'll stop being such a grumpy gus today!

[Janette]

Saw this in my facebook feed this morning. So true!

I have a lot of reasons to love my body right now, and none of them have to do with being perfectly fit!

Had sweet potatoes last night and no digestive issues. SO excited to add them back in.

Read Paleo Mom's explanation of why to avoid eggs on the autoimmune protocol. I'm leaning toward leaving them out until I'm sure my gut is fully healed. Lysozyme sounds like nasty stuff!

Found a fun new way to get gelatin in my diet. Tea jello! I made a big mug of roiibos chai and mixed in 1 tablespoon per cup of this gelatin (much cheaper than those tiny Know packets). Yummy! Though it did make me wish I could add a touch of sweetener. The idea was from Practical Paleo.

I am having Whole30-cheatin' dreams every single night! It's getting a bit silly. I guess those big numbers are messing with my head.

[Aberrantatavia]

Janette that's awesome! Totally true too.

And yes, take heart. It won't last forever. You were tasked to be Night Owl's mom for a reason. The complete exhaustion SUCKS, there's no way around that. But he will grow in the way he's supposed to and you will someday sleep.

He looks happy and healthy and you seem to be a very devoted mom. It's perfect except for that no one sleeping part. Lol

And on your other point, I totally don't love my body today, and it feels pretty neglected. I think ill feed it some relaxing tea and go to bed early.

I'm sure it makes me an old fart ( geeze, I'm only 42) to be in my Jammies and ready for bed at 7 on a Friday night lol

[Janette]

LOL! I dream of being able to go to bed at 7pm! I'm jealous.

Very exciting news today - hubby will be doing a Whole30 in January. I am SO HAPPY. He is going to feel so good and learn so much. Also, it's a real point of contention between us whether food affects mood and health, because he thinks our 4 year old should eat whatever he feels like, and I think our kid would be so much happier if he wasn't on a sugar rollercoaster.

Day 96. These big numbers make me dizzy!

[Janette]

Day 99: A Different Kind of Comfort Eating

I've tried to be more mindful of how I feel after eating, so I can figure this digestion thing out. And I had a surprising insight: my stomach hurts after eating at least half the time. I hadn't really noticed it because I was automatically self-medicating with coconut manna or nut butter. I used to ease it with cookies or chocolate before the Whole30. How had I not noticed this before? I'm kind of amazed about it. It's not that severe, but it's surprisingly frequent. So much to learn about myself!

I've got one last potential stumbling block before I hit day 100 - New Year's Eve! We're going out to a pub dinner tonight, and then back home to several special treats. The Bollie will flow and I will be tempted. Or I might just go to bed early - the baby was up every half hour last night so who knows how long I'll last today.

Happy New Year everyone!!!

[Aberrantatavia]

That's really awesome that your husband is going to do a whole 30! Good for you and him

What kind of stomach hurting?

Starting the new year ending on a whole 100 is awesome - you can do it!!!!

[Janette]

I know! I'm so excited for him. And I feel extra good about it because I never tried to convince him to do it, and always treated his choice to be a vegetarian respectfully. His interest is purely from seeing the change in me. Yay!

The stomach ache is a dull, generalized discomfort. No bloating, no sharp pains. It lasts about 20 minutes. It's worse when I have more vegetables, but I haven't noticed (yet) which particular ones it accompanies.

I don't think I've ever debated having cookies this much in my life! What it comes down to is, will the treat-break energize me psychologically, or will it work against me overall? I generally hate climbing back on the wagon, but I'm also feeling uncomfortable with this high day-count. I had never intended or even day dreamed that I would go on this long. Part of me wants to throw the game to lower the stakes. And the other part of me thinks that's ridiculous and something I ought to grow out of!

[Janette]

Day 100: What I've Learned So Far

100 Days!!!!! I really never thought I would get this far. It certainly wasn't my intention in the beginning. And I think I would have found it far too intimidating a goal for my first Whole30. It's amazing how far you can get by just putting one foot in front of the other!

I'm going to write out some of the things that I think worked in my favor and worked against me, to keep in mind for the next round. It's not the greatest day to try to be articulate; rough night and I took the kids out early so the grown-ups could sleep in. I've got a mushy mind today!

Things that helped

High stakes. I worried that if I strayed, the full weight of my exhaustion would come crashing down on me. Also, I'm still not entirely sure whether the baby still has food sensitivities, and when he reacts to food, we get very, very little sleep.

Logging kept me accountable. Writing down what I ate made me both mindful of what I ate, and mildly self-conscious. People will know if I eat crappy! And I will have to face it again, in the absence of the fleeting pleasure it gave me! It's a great way to have to stare at your own cold, hard reality.

The forum gave me love. Seriously, that really, really helped. Thank you guys!!!!

Being aware of my ability to choose in every single moment. There were so many times in the early days that I reached for what I was really craving and then realized in the moment that I could.just.stop. So I did. And it was liberating! And I learned to apply it to other parts of my life. I feel more in control and closer to the person I want to be.

Realizing that my palette has shifted and those missed 'treats' would taste weird anyway. I learned this the hard way last summer, after I did Wellness Mama's Wellness Challenge. I gave in and had some wine and it tasted nasty! Talk about palette shock!!! And cake/cookies/sweets tasted sickly sweet and didn't really hit the spot.

It became a creative outlet. Figuring out how to eating well within the constraints became an interesting puzzle to solve, most of the time.

Mindless routine is just fine! On the days I could barely see straight, I was so happy to have a few basic things to eat over and over.

Being a stay at home mom. It's definitely easier to stick to the Whole30 when you eat most of your meals at home anyway. We used to eat out 2 or 3 times a week, and I miss that, but I'm so glad I don't need to be taking my food to the office everyday.

Things that worked against me

Feeling sorry for myself. This was a big one. "Since I don't get to sleep, at least I should be allowed to have a lovely big hot chocolate." I had to work a lot on moving from self-pity ("poor me! this isn't fair! i don't deserve this!!!") to self-compassion ("yep, this is rough. i'll do everything i can to talk very good care of myself.")

Feeling like, I've been good for so long, I can slack off now. This has been a growing issue for me, and is the major reason that today will be my last day.

Where to go from here

Well, I certainly don't want to miss this January party! I'll be restarting on January 5th with hubby. I'll be getting serious about low FODMAPs, low eggs, and low nut butters, and I'll be trying to solve the puzzle of why my stomach hurts after eating sometimes but not always.

The only off-roading I'm planning in the meantime is with sugar and maybe a bit of champagne. Right now, I'm dreaming of chocolate for breakfast, paleo cookies for lunch, and champagne for dinner, but I'm hoping I'll come to my senses by the morning!!!

And OMG Derval that is the absolute PERFECT image to end on!!!

[Derval]

100 days *and* a pretty new pic. Well done you, you're bloody brilliant you are!

Here is your reward pic, just like in W30 daily, it's Wonder Woman, asleep!