Whole30 Redux

[GoJo09]

Day 18

 

So, yesterday I ended up going home from work again, feeling unwell. Apparently this was an excuse for me to eat enough food to sink a battleship. I tend to feel like I need to eat when I'm nauseous, which seems completely counter-intuitive, but it nearly always happens. So on the way home I bought some nuts, seeds and sultanas. Which I ate. Then I popped to the supermarket to get some sweet potatoes, and somehow convinced myself that it was acceptable to get some sweet potato chips (technically compliant). I made myself eat the cauli rice I had planned for lunch before I ate the chips. Then I roasted a sweet potato in ghee and ate that. As well as two cacao with almond milk. I also had some coconut butter and a pile of coconut flakes. Then I made salmon and zucchini fritters for dinner.

 

I knew while I was eating it all that it wasn't right, but I just did it anyway. I don't want to say I couldn't help myself, as that's bollocks - I had some chocolate in the cupboard that I didn't eat, and a box of Larabars that I didn't eat, so clearly I could help myself. I told my friend, and she was all like "Maybe your body just needed those things". I don't think that's helpful at all - it was completely mental. Possibly my body was calling out for carbs as I'd (unintentionally) gone 3 or 4 days without any starchy vege, but to say that my body needed me to eat in that manner is just stupid.

 

This morning for breakfast I ate the remaining fritters (with some coleslaw, avo dip), as it's the only thing that I felt like eating - I had some roast beef out too, and had a few bites, but just couldn't face eating it. At lunch I really didn't want what I'd packed (pork stirfry with bok choy) - I couldn't say what I did want instead, only that it was something yummy and not that. I think that's a carry-over from yesterday. I made myself eat it, but as a compromise I went to the health food shop to pick up some kind of fat to bump up the meal. Was going to get coconut butter, but they didn't have the little sachets, only ones of macadamia or almond butter, which I didn't want to get involved with. I ended up getting a packet of dried coconut chunk, which I sat at my desk nibbling on for an hour or so, then put the packet away half full, completely satisfied.

 

So, I think I'll have to keep an eye on my carbs to try to avoid this happening again (although binge eating is not new to me).

 

I'm not sure what I'll have for dinner - maybe cauli faux rice with prawns. And some sweet potato.

[GoJo09]

Day 21

 

I don't know why I continue to buy nuts, thinking "this time it will be different". It's never different. Those things are like crack to me! Bloaty, bingey, crack.

 

Whether a result of eating too much yesterday (somehow I keep hanging my hat on "it's all compliant", which is really not the point!), or if my sprint session this morning did a number on my digestive tract (I honestly thought I was going to chuck in someone's garden walking home afterwards), either way I was not hungry this morning. As in, wasn't hungry when I woke up, wasn't hungry when I got home from the gym, wasn't hungry after a shower, wasn't hungry after studying for a few hours. I started making lunch at 12.30 and I still wasn't hungry - after having eaten nothing since 9pm last night. I made a big lunch anyway, and ate it all, but I really wasn't feeling it.

 

Strangely though, less than 2 hours later my stomach started acting like it was hungry. Ignoring this seems to have made it go away.

 

Will be more organised for this week ahead, and am revisiting my original goals of: No nuts! No eating straight from the fridge/container - everything must be served on a plate. No snacks, only mini-meals if I'm truly "fish and broccoli" hungry.

 

18 days until I go to Melbourne for the weekend, so focus on 100%, letter of the law, compliance until then.

[GoJo09]

Day 23

 

Yesterday's food was pretty spot on. I went indoor climbing after work, so brought dinner to have before I went (both for fuel, and because waiting until 10pm for dinner is not my idea of a good time). So, I had lunch a little earlier than usual, and dinner at 6pm. I wasn't really hungry for dinner (as in, if I could have waited an hour I would have preferred to), but no matter. I was super full afterwards - I still haven't got to the point where I can stop eating when there's still food on my plate, or even know when I need to stop eating - clearly I eat far too quickly.

 

I was a bit hungry by the time I did finally get home, so had half a cold sweet potato and some sauerkraut - weird combo! Also, far too close to bed time, which was only about 15mins later - it was a bit hard getting to sleep with my stomach still working.

 

I had forgotten how much I love climbing - I'm fired up to get a membership at the climbing gym, buy new shoes and harness... I only have to go 3x fortnight to make the membership cost effective, and I can get it on a 3 month term, so I can cancel it then if I don't feel I'm getting the most out of it. One of the other great things about last night - I didn't know any of the people that I went climbing with - they were a group from Meetup.com. This is a huge deal for me - I get pretty bad social anxiety when I don't know people or am going in to an unknown situation or even if I'm going to a group thing with friends and know I'll have to talk to people I don't really know. I get so nervous that a lot of the time I just cancel. Yesterday however, the nerves never came. Now, I can't say this is 100% related to diet, but I'm sure it helps in that my nerves aren't already frayed from the constant blood sugar "where's my next meal coming from?!" hangry feeling. I was also listening to a podcast yesterday, and one of the guys said "If people judge you - nothing happens" - I don't know why that spoke to me when my therapist telling me pretty much the same thing didn't, but there you have it. Obviously I'm just in the place to hear it now - I've made a lot of progress since I saw the therapist a year or so ago.

 

Yesterday's food:

1. 2 eggs, silverbeet, broccoli, leeks, tsp CO, 1/2 avo; 1/2 apple; coffee with CC. Long black at about 10.
2. Choc chilli with bok choy, 1/2 avo
3. Cauliflower faux rice with egg and chicken thigh. And hot pepper sauce - am officially addicted to this stuff!
4. 1/2 sweet potato, spoonful sauerkraut

Today's food:

1. 2 eggs, silverbeet, broccoli, leeks, mushrooms, tsp CO, 1/2 avo; coffee with CC
2. Salad, roast beef, olives, coconut flakes, pine nuts, cold roast vege
3. Salmon fillet, asparagus wrapped in proscuitto, maybe some other greenery, maybe just a whole lot of asparagus as I have tonnes

[GoJo09]

Bah, stupid emotional reactions to things making me want to eat!

 

Just had to RSVP for a hen's party that includes paying $75 for a belly dancing class that I don't want to do. On top of that, I have to buy an outfit to wear (which I hope I can get on the cheap), do a scrapbooking page about our friendship (and I hate creative things like that!), buy dinner on the night, go out drinking and get pressured about not drinking, oh, and drive 2 hours each way to get there, so probably have to get accommodation or get hassled about not staying.

 

I like my friend, obviously, but I don't have this kind of money lying around, and I also have to do a fair amount of study that weekend and don't want to lose the entire weekend to something I don't want to do. I know it will probably end up being a bit of fun, but I just don't want to do it.

 

And even though I'm not even remotely hungry (and in fact am still quite full from lunch) I am eyeing up the emergency Larabars in my drawer in the hopes they'll make me feel better.

 

Negative Nelly.

[Derval]

Well done for you for doing the meetup!

 

Tbh re the hen I think that is a helluva lot to ask, unless that girl was my super best friend I would send my aplogies & maybe take her out for a nice lunch before/after the event. See if you can farm out the scrapbooking to a friend that enjoys that kind of thing (hey hang around Michaels - isn't that the name of the store? and give some randomer 10bucks to do it for you!)

[Physibeth]

I agree with Derval about the hen party. I would just let her know how much you wish you could be there but it just isn't possible and ask if you can take her out. I had a friend do that with me when I got married and it was actually really special. If I was in Oz I would totally help you with your scrapbook page. They don't have to be super complicated. You can just mat a favorite photo with your friend and write a nice paragraph and maybe add a sticker flower or two. What you write and the photo will mean more to her then the rest of the stuff.

 

Hang in there and be strong!

[GoJo09]

She's a pretty good friend, so I don't want to pike. And neither the dance class or the scrapbooking are her thing (it's all a surprise) - I'm pretty sure it's her much older sister's idea. I just need to suck it up and remember it's not all about me - I think I'm going to drive home that night though, rather than staying. But oddly enough, the sugar cravings subsided pretty soon after venting, so that's awesome .

 

Yeah, I was pretty damn proud of myself for going to the Meetup - I have a tendancy to overthink things and come to the very worst conclusion, therefore convincing myself that there's no point even attempting them (oh, hi there hen's night that I already know will be sucky!).

 

Day 24

 

I was going to jog this morning, but got on the treadmill and felt all heavy and tight, so just walked for 30mins instead, and then did 20mins yoga. I really should have stretched on Monday after climbing - my hamstring was really tight. Next time - train yoga! (It's pretty empty that time of night, and I can make the 35min train ride go faster by doing some downward dog .) I was also really hungry this morning, which I'm usually not at that time, so had a few almonds beforehand, and half a sweet potato afterwards - which meant that I wasn't hungry enough to finish my breakfast half an hour later.

 

Today's food:

1. 5-6 almonds; 1/2 sweet potato
2. 2 eggs, broccoli, bok choy, leeks, CO; coffee with CC
3. Salad with chicken thigh, coconut flakes, pine nuts, capsicum, carrot, cucumber
4. Might do a repeat of last night's asparagus, mushroom, capsicum and proscuitto fried in CO, with a bowl of choc chilli. Those two things don't really go together at all.

[GoJo09]

Day 25

 

I don't want to sound like a whiney little girl, but WTF do I have to do to lose some weight?! Honestly, everyone who switches to a W30/Paleo/Primal diet seems to drop fat in their sleep, and I'm chugging away making no progress at all - I know everyone's different, and I have seen other benefits, and I haven't changed my diet just to lose weight, but wah wah wah!

 

It doesn't help that my period is 11 days late and I had 3 days last week where I overate sweet potatoes and nuts (as in, my stomach hurt from eating too much). But 3 days out of 24 should not result in me looking and feeling so ordinary. Added to the fact I started my first W30 at the end of Feb, and have been pretty much Whole 9 since (with a single instance of falling jumping face first into a tub of grand mariner ice cream) - I know I have some food issues still to overcome (mainly mindless weekend overeating, which can usually always be traced back to emotions/stress).

 

I'm fairly sure that my meals are template appropriate - I'm always hungry right around my next meal time (I generally eat at 7am, 12.30-1pm and 7pm), so I don't think I'm overeating - although I do always finish what's on my plate regardless - it's like I have a phobia about throwing food out...

 

Anyway, enough whingeing! Boxing at lunchtime today, which requires a bit of shuffling with food, and then I think I'm going to go and buy some climbing gear after work, which will be fun.

 

Today's food:

1. Choc chilli with bok choy and avo-tahini dip; coffee w/ CC (and a little extra CC for me...)
2. Coleslaw, homemade mayo, tuna
3. Sweet potato, broccoli, egg
4. Omelette w/ leeks, mushrooms, capsicums, proscuitto

[Renee Lee]

Hey there, HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU AREN'T LOSING WEIGHT?!?!

Weighing and scales are NOT part of the whole thirty. Weight is an arbitrary number and has no bearing on health or body composition. Look at OTHER metrics! How are you feeling?

As for fat loss, what's your stress level like? How's your sleep? What's your activity level?

Honestly, worrying about weight loss is probably the reason for the plateau. I posted a while back about my own experience with it: I'm a weight class athlete and was freaking out, trying EVERYTHING to get down into the next lower weight class. I couldn't even drop 2lbs of water weight before a meet. (NOT ENCOURAGED DURING A W30!!! STRICTLY A TEMPORARY WEIGHTLIFTING STRATEGY)

The second I stopped thinking about it, said that if i was going to compete as a super heavy, I'd better train to be the strongest super heavy I could be? Dropped the 5lbs I needed to and was comfortably under 75 kilos, without even trying.

Annoying as HECK, but it's often times the reality

[GoJo09]

Don't you worry, Renee - I hid my scales after the end of my last W30 back in March, and I can't actually remember where they are! So def no weighing going on here . And yep, I 100% understand about the whole worrying about it making it worse - and normally I don't, just the past few days... Anyway, I checked my tracker this morning and my period was 11 days late - so I'm just a mess of hormones and bloating! (EDIT: my period just arrived and I immediately felt a million times better!)

 

I was having a big ol' whinge to my friend this morning about this, and told her how last night I couldn't get to sleep because I just could not stop thinking about my weight and my study and blah blah blah - and how it's like my brain chooses to focus on weight to stress about because it's a hell of a lot easier than stressing about study (I have 2.5 weeks left of a Diploma of Project Management that I'm doing part time while working) - so yeah, I don't exactly have the stress levels dialled in!

 

And, at the same time as my weight being a pain in the butt - my skin is amazing! It's clear, it's glowing. And I know perfectly well that everything I'm doing is benefting my insides. I just wish that was reflected in my waistline!

 

Sleep is generally around 7.5-8 hours a night, but I always wake up middle of the night to go to the toilet, so that can't be helping anything. The only time I don't wake up is if I haven't been drinking water during the day - so it seems like to sleep through the night I need to be dehydrated...

 

Activity - I'm not smashing it in the gym at the moment, just doing a couple of bodyweight strength sessions, a run or two, a sprint session, and walking. Oh, and yoga and boxing once a week! Plus I just added in climbing. So, I'm doing plenty, just not super intense. I'm going to stick with that until I get back from a holiday at the start of August, and then I'm going to do a 12 week structured weights  program.

 

Stupid brain-body connection!

[GoJo09]

I must have eaten something dodgy or been exposed to some pollen or something at boxing because my eyes have been itching all afternoon, and now my face and neck are itching exactly like of I'd taken jack3d or some pre-wo supp.

Ended up just having coffee with coconut cream pre-wo. Good session with not much cardio, so that was nice. Was pretty hungry by the time I got back and changed and had 10 mins until a meeting, so scoffed down the sweet potato, broccoli and egg concoction - but of herb salt on top and it was fantastic.

Then in my meeting with my boss, she was all like "what's going on with you? Are you stressing about food?" I don't know how she does it, because I hardly talk about food, except I guess saying I don't eat things because they have gluten or sugar. She basically just told me to calm down and it's not the end of the world if I don't lose weight (she doesn't think I need to lose any anyway).

[GoJo09]

Day 26

 

I am 100% more even-keeled and happy today. I have no idea why - Getting everything off my chest? Getting my period? Buying new running shoes? Spending $230 on climbing gear? Being a big girl and asking some people I'm friendly with at work (but not exactly friends with) to do something and them saying yes and being excited about it? (OK, it was going to see Man of Steel at the movies, so they were probably more excited about Henry Cavill than hanging with me, but they still said yes!)

 

Anyway, it seems that once you start thinking positive, everything flows from there. Duh!

 

Drove to work today, which requires leaving home super early to avoid traffic, so had a little snack at home and then proper breakfast at work after a 20 min walk.

 

Today's food:

1. Half sweet potato w/ nut butter; coffee w/ CC
2. Choc chilli w/ bok choy and half avo; coffee w/ CC
3. Chicken thigh, asparagus, capsicum, broccoli, mayo
4. Going to my friend's for dinner and movies - she's making a compliant stirfry, but we're also having some sweet potato crisps (I will live with the guilt of it )

I might go for a walk up to the next suburb at lunch to grab some things - depends on the weather and whether I can be bothered changing in to my shiny new sneakers...