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Deep Self-Compassion August 2013 Support Group Thread


HollyBee

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Howdy -

 

I did my first Whole 30 in June and it was a life-changer. I was 100% on target food-choice wise, which amazed me...But I didn't do as well in the sleeping well, and regularly eating breakfast areas.  Nevertheless, I felt better than I have in years and much to my surprise, developed a sense of calmness and peace that I never expected. I figured I'd lose some weight and have some more energy, but I never expected it to have such an impact on my stress and anxiety levels....

 

So flash forward to July. I tried to manage a thoughtful reintroduction, but I was away from home for most of the month, and I just wasn't able to keep things going on the road. For my initial Whole 30 I took the additional pledge of preparing all my own meals - ZERO eating out. And it helped a lot. But when I was forced to eat out, eventually the old habits returned, and I ended up feeling pretty poorly.

 

So here we are in August, and I'm commiting to another Whole 30. But this time I'd like to focus more on the self-care aspects as well as the food choices. I was part of a group thread in June, and I found I got really tired of reading food logs. I loved getting the Whole30Daily email subscription though....and I'm really gonna miss that this time (I'm assuming it just repeats verbatim). So anyway.....this is a long way of saying, I'd like to start a thread for other August people that is all about self-compassion, and a deep integration of the Whole 30 principles, and maybe a little less heavy on the food log, talking about missing foods, weight chatter, etc.  I'd like to have a place where people practicing radical self-compassion can congregate to share supportive messages, emotions and observations on this ride....kind of a makeshift Whole30Daily that we put together as we go along for each other.

 

I hope there are folks that would like to do this with me. We'll see!

 

Thanks for listening,

 

Holly

 

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Oh huh I like tho. Looking forward to reading and perhaps commenting. It was really hard for me to increase sleep until I finally beat my body to death running on five hours of sleep some nights and finally had to learn what rest days ate. They eating right part is a pot easier for me than the taking care of yourself part

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This log is a great idea. I think this is exactly the place I should be for my August Whole30 journey.

I had a baby in June and immediately did my fourth (I think) Whole 30. I've had little deviation since because this time I think I was just ready for this to stick for life. But, life is very chaotic right now and clean eating is just not enough to keep me sane. Just before I popped on this thread, I decided I would find at least five minutes a day to meditate during this whole 30.

Also, if I were to report what I ate everyday, it would be pretty difficult. With a 7 week old and a 3 year old, some days I snack all day in order to get something close to enough food! :-)

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Love this idea Holly!

I am so proud of myself for having completed my first Whole30 last month. My family benefited too because I refused to cook separate meals for them so they ate what I ate and everyone tried and loved some new foods. I feel like a better mother because instead of stopping at McDonald's to buy them dinner and then making myself something easy at home I just drove home and we cooked together. I got out my paleo cookbooks and printed off ideas from paleo blogs and let them choose some meals. Even my husband got in on the act and helped pre-chop things for breakfasts and we all really enjoyed spending more time in the kitchen together.

 

There are so many things we spend time regretting instead of giving ourselves the love we deserve for the life and energy we put into being wives, daughters, friends, mothers etc., so here's to having a great month of self compassion!

Melaina

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Gosh! I'm delighted at the response to this thread. I'm glad that there are others that are out there trying to work out the kinks of integrating whole 30 principles full time. I felt like I really needed to take another go at thirty more days because making those big decisions at the "macro" level seems to really help me. I can commit for a limited time period. But it's much harder when the macro level loosens up, and I'm faced with the rest of my life making the micro decisions moment-to-moment.

 

I guess I'm just not feeling ready to take the training wheels off yet. The very structured plan helps. I haven't finished my goals for this month, but one of them is something about cultivating the strength and flexibility to be able to make those ongoing micro decisions towards health without the framework of an "official" thirty day commitment. 

 

Sounds like there are a lot of us here in caregiving roles that don't do quite as well with ourselves. I take care of my Dad who has dementia, and I work full time and manage a whole lot of other details as well. I have a really hard time priorotizing the things I need to do for myself. Seems like those things are the ones that always fall off the list first.

 

I'm hopeful that the group support will be helpful over these next four weeks.

 

So how did everyone do today?

 

Dinner and an appropriate bedtime are still on the way for me (I hope)....Last night I probably managed to get to sleep by midnight and get up at seven, so not too shabby compared to the usual.

 

Hope everyone else is having a good day!

 

p.s. Here's a mindful self-compassion meditation that I thought was nice:

 

http://mindfulselfcompassion.org/meditations/Loving-Kindness%20for%20Beginners.pdf

 

Hugs to everyone -

 

Holly

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Hey HollyBee :)

It was a good day here in the desert. Trying to connect with those around me with the same level of attention that I am paying to what I eat, so I spent the day chatting with friends, hanging out with family, and allowing myself to exist in the moment.

Now it's bedtime. Later than I'd like it to be, but a fair trade for getting to spend time with my mom.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I hope it's just terrific for everyone.

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I really like the idea of focusing on the other aspects of the plan. I'm spending this 30 addressing some other things that need my attention instead of, say, obsessing over food and avoiding other things that need to be addressed. Trying to get my environment in order.

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Shoot, I had composed a long and thoughtful response, hit some button and lost it all. Dang. Okay, I'll try to recreate it...

 

I need this right now so thank you for doing this! I finally, after multiple attempts, completed a Whole30 in June of this year. Most of those 30 days were an emotional and physical struggle. On the other attempts, I saw results fairly quickly; on this one, it wasn't until nearly the end that I began to lose inches, gain energy, and feel positive again. But I was so happy that I had done it, at last!

 

But...then...as the original poster said, I tried to reintroduce intelligently...and failed epically. Frankly, I think there's a part of me that has used sugar as comfort/celebration/reward for so long that being sugar-free (or sugar-controlled) is ego-dystonic. In order to succeed, I have to not just change my eating habits, I have to change my identity, to that athlete who fuels her body as the norm, not the exception.

 

By the way, I'm 51 years old. One of my greatest challenges physically is my bad back. I have no idea if it's just age, or family history (my mother had rheumatoid arthritis), or a car accident I had 7 years ago, but I have problems with my sacral joint and lumbar area that make me crazy sometimes. One of the most joyous things that happened in my very first Whole30 attempt was that those problems improved dramatically, and it's one of the things that keeps me coming back to it.

 

I've been primarily gluten-free for over a year, and that was the best thing I have done for myself in a long, long time. Before I did that, I had begun to have bouts of nausea that literally had me in bed, barely able to move, for 24 hours at a time. I had increasing migraines. Both have been gone since I gave up gluten.

 

I mostly am dairy-free, other than my #1 nemesis: ICE CREAM and chocolate. This has had a tremendously positive effect on congestion and allergies!

 

So my final demon/challenge...sugar. So here we go, and I hope it's okay that I'm joining you so late in the process. 

 

My plan is to take this Whole30 from yesterday (8/10) through 9/15. This is one day before the Lurong Living Paleo Challenge; I tried this last year and had great results until I increasingly cheated and dropped out about two weeks before the end. It was TOUGH, so I'm looking forward to tackling it again. (Oh, and scared to death, too!) 

 

The Lurong challenge goes from 9/16 for two months. The greatest challenge - other than every day arm wrestle with the sugar demon - will be celebrating my wedding anniversary without ice cream and cake! Then it'll be the holidays...but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it, LOL.

 

So, I have some goals:

 

1.  Whole30 plus some new supplements (Maximized Living) that I'm hoping will further enhance my energy and recovery, especially my joints. 

2.  Exercise: Crossfit 4 x a week. Active rest days - either walk/run/Zumba. One of my biggest challenges will be scaling without embarrassment; I tend to push myself too hard and push my weight up, thereby sacrificing form, hurt myself and have to rest for a week.

3.  Back hygiene: PT and chiro every day

4.  Back and core strengthening: 30 banded pushups, 4 front planks and 2 side planks daily

5.  Spiritual: I joined a New Testament challenge, reading one chapter per day to Easter.

6.  Hydration: at least 66 ounces of water per day

7.  Sleep: good sleep hygiene, in bed one hour before bed time, lights and sound dimmed - no Facebook, no Candy Crush, LOL!

8.  Kindness to those around me

 

So...here I go. I do tend to log my meals and even more so, my workouts, because it helps reinforce getting through the day!

 

Oh, my name is Linda.

 

And thank you again for starting this!

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Yesterday, day 1, was excellent for me, though I didn't work out. I did spend the afternoon cooking in preparation for the coming week. 

 

Today - Bacon, eggs, zucchini fritters, fresh tomatoes and a banana for breakfast, with my breakfast supplements.

Did my PT and chiro exercises, pushups, planks, and 25 minutes of Zumba

 

Getting ready for lunch and just enjoying a sunny day that is quite cool for Missouri at this time of year!

 

Lunch - beef and veggies with a touch of Paleo mayo and avocado with coconut milk, banana, and cocoa powder

 

Dinner - kind of a ditto - beef and veggies with a sweet potato

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I've had to help a family member with some pretty serious issues so I didn't put it on myself to do a strict 30 in August, though my eating habits haven't been all that different. Still grain free, sugar free, dairy free, gearing up for September though. Hoping to hit a milestone by the end of the year.

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Hey LindaLee! Sounds like you have a good framework for what you want to accomplish. Awesome.

 

MrsRobinson, totally understandable. Sounds like you're choosing to keep your life manageable. That's wisdom, right there.

 

This thread doesn't really seem to be going, but I'm going to keep it alive because this deep self-compassion is basically my entire approach to life right now. So keep posting if y'all feel like it :)

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Hello Everyone - Sorry I've been gone so long. I'm a caregiver too, and working full time, so sometimes life's little details get away from me. I started my second Whole 30 on 8/1 with a bang and felt great - then had out of town guests and got off track. Working on getting back to the core of what works for me, which is pretty strict Whole 30 with a little bit of dairy. I'm trying to manage how to morph from 100% compliance to a more long-term workable plan following the 80%/20% rule (though I'd like to be more like 90%/10%).

 

I did very well with the super-strict Whole 30 because for those 30 days I made it my #1 priority and I also commited to absolutely NO EATING OUT. Everyhting else in my life fell a distant second to keeping with Whole 30. I could give myself that luxury for a month, but I really can't do it again, at least not right now....so I'm struggling to find some balance and I feel like I'm on a teeter totter of good days and bad days that I'm trying really hard not to beat myself up about.

 

Hope everyone else is doing well, and being kind to themselves no matter how they are doing. It's a struggle in our type A, hyper-judging culture, that's for sure! It's so easy to become your own worst enemy in your own head....

 

In case anyone is interested, I'm working on the self-love and self-compassion angle through yoga too. Later this month (starting August 26th) I'm participating in an online yoga workshop called Practice: Embodying Your Curvy & Beloved Body. If anyone is interested in joining me, there is a link with with information here: http://www.curvyyoga.com/practice/

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HollyBee, your stories and mine are so similar...I think/hope we will be able to help each other find that important balance. I'm not a caregiver, but I do work fulltime, and my husband has shared custody of his son so spends about a third of his time in our other house about 2 hours away. I drive up there every other weekend to spend with them, so my schedule for exercise and preparing food is kind of rigid. If something goes awry, it's easy for me to get off track and turn to easy, sugar-y foods.

 

For example...yesterday. Best laid plans of mice and men and all that...but we had some urgent things come up at work and I ended up in meetings all through and right after lunch. Shortly after that, I took a dear friend to the cancer center for her radiation treatment. We had a blast (under the circumstances), but I couldn't resist stopping at our premium grocery store for some gluten-free sweetness and ice cream. I have to say that I regretted it nearly as soon as I ate the ice cream. I felt very "blechy." (that's a technical term, LOL)

 

Today, however, is another day.

 

I have had a great day, much more in control of the sugar demons.

 

M1 - the usual, beef and veggies, carrots and olives. Meal preceded by Max Living supplement.

 

Mid-morning: Max Greens.

 

M2 - mustard chicken, zucchini fritters, salad (tomato, spinach, cucumber, black olives, topped with olive oil and lemon juice), and green apples.

 

Pre-workout: hard boiled egg (I planned to have nuts but completely forgot)

 

Workout: Crossfit:

Warmup - stations (GHD situps, planks, pushups, lunges, ring rows, and inchworms)

Skill: EMOM (every minute on the minute) Squat clean and jerks for 5 minutes - very nice way to practice this rough move.

WOD:

Row 2k then rest two minutes, then

Grace: 30 clean and jerks. 5:13 with 45# Not anywhere near RX - I probably never will RX most WODs, but I'm okay with that. And this was a PR for me for that number of reps. 

 

Post-workout: MaxLiving drink of Perfect Protein, MaxGreens, and MaxRecovery

 

Dinner:

Salmon cakes and zucchini fritter with mayo

Olives

Tomatoes (I love this time of year in the farmer's market)

Frozen banana with coconut milk and cocoa powder

 

Feeling very good, very centered. Tomorrow will be a challenge, since my husband heads back up north to be with his son. Could use cheerleading and prayers!

 

Hope you're doing well today, HollyBee!

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Holy wow, I'm totally jumping on this thread. Totally need this.

 

I'm a working mom of an almost-2-year-old. Hubby just started gainful employment, so the household has moved from one major stress (unemployed spouse) to another major stress (who watches the baby?). I've also been battling candy binges that are triggered when I'm upset, anxious, or bored. I would like to use my experience as a way to heal myself, both inside and, well, inside-inside.

 

Anyway I had started Aug. 1, had a weekend of crap-tastic choices, and am climbing back up with no bones broken. I had a nice lunch, did a decent vent in my log, and am feeling a little more calm and collected about everything.

 

So ... glad to meet y'all!

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Workout: Crossfit:

WOD:

Row 2k then 

 

Row 2k then pass out?? That's what I would done, haha. We had 4 rounds of rowing/running 400m + 21 pushups yesterday. We were allowed to choose whether to row or run. I ran one round but it was 110 out so I rowed the others. Ugh!!! It was just awful all around :P

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