Erika LLenza Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 OK, the last time I did a Whole30, I really liked the results. But there was one thing that was really hard to deal with throughout the 30 days, and that was feeling like a social pariah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erika LLenza Posted November 8, 2012 Author Share Posted November 8, 2012 Errr... sorry, I accidentally posted before I even finished typing the question. Since a lot of social activities revolve around eating and drinking. Do you all have any suggestions for coping? Obviously no drinking, but I don't want to spend another month feeling like I can't really do anything because it's noncompliant. Eating out is quite the challenge! And none of my friends seem all that interested in hanging out doing non food and drink related things. Anyway, so I'm going to try the idea of carrying your own oil and vinegar so you can eat salads out. Does anyone have any other suggestions to keep me from becoming hermit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny M Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 This was the hardest part for me. The food part? Piece of cake. Changing my whole social scene? Absurdly hard. What I realized through some coaching with Melissa was that I was holding onto something that was actually making me sick and depressed. You have to put this whole thing into perspective...you are working on healing your entire body...a body you're going to have your entire life. You want to treat it well and you want it to return the favor and stay healthy. 30 days of impact to your social life are not devastating. A lifetime of metabolic issues and gut problems is devastating. Check out my profile and read my story. It's short but I know where you're coming from. I found ways to learn new habits like shooting pool with friends instead of drinking at bars or having dinner parties instead of going to restaurants. The reward I found was that whole30 didn't just change my diet, it changed my life, and in an extremely positive way. Good luck and use the forum for support! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeepifer Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 I don't have a social life, but I'd like one... LOL I just say I have food allergies (or if they've known me, I say I've "developed" them). No one questions that! Now dating... and trying to find someone that is also paleo-minded, that's a whole 'nother can o' worms! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaseyD Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 I think you really have to shift your mindset when you go out. A restaurant or a bar is just an easy common ground for people to get together, but everyone is probably not really just there for the food. If you eat a real meal before you go, you won't be hungry and so it will be easier to not worry about the food. Then, you can put all your focus on your friends. If people ask you if you're eating/why aren't you eating, then just say you ate before you came. There doesn't have to be more said than that, if you don't want to. It really just takes practice. You have to practice disconnecting the social aspect from the actual eating. The best place to practice this is in a social setting at a restaurant. I have a friend who doesn't like to spend money, so he never eats when he goes out to restaurants and rarely drinks at the bar. He's done this for years, and he never appears to be focused on the food/drinks anyone else has. We just know that this is the way he is, and we actually admire him for it. The guy gets to travel while working a seasonal landscaping job because he's so smart with his money. I've started trying to think of this approach as a money saving reason, too. However you handle it, refusing to go out because you're doing a Whole30 is not a good idea. That's a fast track to resenting what you're doing. Go out without an empty stomach and just enjoy your company. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan W Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 I don't have a social life, but I'd like one... LOL I just say I have food allergies (or if they've known me, I say I've "developed" them). No one questions that! Now dating... and trying to find someone that is also paleo-minded, that's a whole 'nother can o' worms! As someone here pointed out, the "allergy" thing can backfire. If all of a sudden (for 30 days) you have allergies and then 30 days later you reintroduce cheese and it's no longer an "allergy", friends may look at you like the boy who cried wolf. My friends all know what I'm doing (this is my third W30) and they could care less. In fact, they are totally sensitive and even cook w30 for me if I go over for dinner. I think honestly saying you are trying to heal what has been bothering you is a good approach and that way, you are leading by example. Now, at a table with strangers, I'd totally pull the allergy card. I've also discovered people are not nearly as focused on what I eat and drink as I once thought they were. I will happily go to happy hour with friends and drink plain soda water (San Pelligrino..yum!) or unsweetened ice tea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan W Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 As someone here pointed out, the "allergy" thing can backfire. If all of a sudden (for 30 days) you have allergies and then 30 days later you reintroduce cheese and it's no longer an "allergy", friends may look at you like the boy who cried wolf. My friends all know what I'm doing (this is my third W30) and they could care less. In fact, they are totally sensitive and even cook w30 for me if I go over for dinner. I think honestly saying you are trying to heal what has been bothering you is a good approach and that way, you are leading by example. Now, at a table with strangers, I'd totally pull the allergy card. I've also discovered people are not nearly as focused on what I eat and drink as I once thought they were. I will happily go to happy hour with friends and drink plain soda water (San Pelligrino..yum!) or unsweetened ice tea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erika LLenza Posted November 8, 2012 Author Share Posted November 8, 2012 Thanks Johnny! I did one whole30 and loved it. Then went on my honeymoon in Italy and broke it. Want to do another after the holidays (and try to have Whole30 days in between holiday celebrations, which could easily be whole30 weeks). Keeping to the program was challenging, but I did it and I loved how I felt, and to be a little vain, how I looked (hey, my hair and skin were so healthy!). It was the lack of social life that was the toughest. The suggestion to go play pool or something is great. This keeps my friends within reach of their beer without feeling awkward that I'm not drinking or eating because we're also doing something else. If I were a better cook, a dinner party might be good... Hahaha! I'm totally up for keeping with the rules. I just want ways to do it while I still have a social life. I can stay away from the beer and cookies, I just don't want to be left out because that's what I'm doing. If that makes sense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny M Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 It makes total sense. I'd force my friends to compromise. I actually went to bars with them but ONLY if they had a pool table. I sipped seltzer by the table, far from the bar, while they drank alcohol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
songbirdtree Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 I know this is an old thread, but one thing I've found is that an increasing number of bars and restaurants have kombucha on tap in my area (Dallas). Last weekend, it was gorgeous outside, so we went to a couple of bars and I had two glasses of kombucha while my boyfriend enjoyed beer! After that, I went to a restaurant with Whole30-approved options that I found through a bit of Google research. It was a great, social day and I was still compliant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chichi Posted January 26, 2018 Share Posted January 26, 2018 I need to start asking for kombucha, maybe it will get carried around here. Thank goodness for the comeback of arcade bars! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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