Ari. Posted June 1, 2013 Share Posted June 1, 2013 I successfully completed a Whole30 in May. I did have my bad days but this is definitely the right lifestyle for me. There is no question that I'm healthier while eating paleo. Yet, I have created some kind of psychological block that isn't even allowing me to begin another Whole30 because I feel like I'm kidding myself. I don't know how to live my life without my sugar habit and while the Whole30 does give my body a break I am lacking motivation to even get started since I know I can't sustain it. I do believe that I can change but I don't know how. Just feeling really discouraged! I recently went to visit my grandmother who has dementia and I noticed little things I was doing to soothe myself during the rough visit like chewing on gum continuously and taking a drink from my sugary coffee drink every time she said something completely out of context. How would I survive without those methods of coping?? Eating sugar is the only thing that got me through several deaths in my family and it continues to be what carries me through stressful periods. I moved away from all of my friends in high school and spent the summer eating ice cream everyday. I feel as though sugar is an old and reliable friend and I can't imagine the rest of my life without it. Does/has anyone else ever felt this way? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzy Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Oh yes, Ari, I feel like that all the time. In fact, I'm stuck in a very unhealthy loop right now. I've been eating fast food and lots of sugar for a couple weeks now and I'm not even sure how I got here again. I love the way I feel when I'm eating good food and taking care of myself, yet there's nothing like dissipating nervous energy with super delicious junk food, especially sugary ones. The thing I'm trying to hold on to is the concept of lifestyle. The only way people can deal with bad feelings is to actually let themselves feel them. You can't keep burying your emotions alive in junky food. The best thing you can do is write it all out in a journal every day and then talk about it with a therapist and/or close friend. It really is the only way to go. If you've eaten that junk food your whole life, it's going to take more than a few Whole30s to sort that out. You have to delve straight into your feelings and figure out what they're telling you about yourself. Also, after your done expressing bad feelings, go and socialize in a fun way as often as you can. It sounds cheesy, but stay "up" as they say. Be as optimistic as is comfortably possible. Something I'm finding really helpful is just getting the hell out of my house and having lots of new experiences. Even if you think, say, a trip to a bookstore is going to be totally dull, it's better than bingeing on junk food at home alone. And you never know what wonderful things could happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Maryann Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Great post, Suzy. I did a Wnole100 in a group the beginning of the year. We found after the first 30 days that our journey became much more about personal growth than it was about food. We all recognized that we'd been using food to "stuff" emotions, and not having that option forced us to look at a host of other things in our lives. It wasn't easy, but I think we would all agree it was well worth it in the end. Ari, you already accept the fact that you're a sugar junkie. That's the first step. No addict ever got clean or sober by deciding they would never have _____________ (fill in drug of choice) again in their life. There's a reason AA uses the phrase "One day at a time" so much. You can't choose to do or not to do something for life. You can choose not to have any today. Or for the next hour, or for the next ten minutes, or however long you have to break it down in order to be successful. You eat an elephant one bite at a time, not all at once. Give yourself some targets that will allow you to be successful, and the fact that you made it through that time period successfully will encourage you to keep going. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari. Posted June 4, 2013 Author Share Posted June 4, 2013 Really good points. I know that it all comes down to stuffing my emotions, and I was able to scratch the surface of some painful emotions while doing my Whole30. Suzy, it's so true that you have to try to stay "up", something that is really hard for me. I think it's a sign of maturity to be optimistic and positive because it's so easy to be sulky and indulge in negative emotions. I am just learning that, and I think being social will be a crucial part of my journey. 1Maryann, I think I may have taken the Whole30 too literally because I thought the only way to be successful is to go cold turkey and never look back but I am beginning to realize that it's not a one size fits all. 30 days is probably a great physical reset but by no means a sufficient amount of time to attempt a psychological reset. I hope I can find it within myself to do the program for a longer time period because I know that in the absence of unhealthy foods I could get in touch with my emotions. It's a scary thought! But like ISWF says, none of us are actually in a unique situation where we are incapable of recovery. It's easy to fall into the mind set of "well, it works for them but it can't work for me". Which is where I've been for a long time. I guess literally the only difference is: yes I will stick this out or no I will not stick this out. And maybe sticking it out doesn't mean being perfect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beets Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 Great points here. I also relied on sugar as my escape, reward, consolation prize, pick-me-up. Even at the end of my W30 I started using dried fruit in the same way I'd used chocolate (mid afternoon snacking, waited too long to eat lunch, kids driving me crazy, family psychodrama). It's really hard to kick it. And nobody is perfect. I mean, look at the amazing women who did the Whole 100. I know a few of them are back on a w30. It's always a learning process. Some of us have more to un-learn but we can all learn new ways of coping with unpleasant feelings. I definitely wasn't ready to be loosed into the wild after my w30. I just started my second yesterday. (First was in April.) A few of us did a mini AIP and we also all got into the psychological aspects. A bunch of us tried self-hypnosis/relaxation tracks (I'm a big fan--I love Davd Illig's weight loss track, which isn't focused on weight loss, more about changing brain patterns and how we see ourselves, food, exercise), we also talked about meditation. We've all taken steps forward and had time when we made choices we weren't completely happy with, but the important thing is not getting bogged down, moving forward. I do believe though that the only way to beat sugar addiction is to stop eating it. So if you are staying in post-w30 territory maybe give yourself permission to eat dairy or a bowl of rice or corn chips if you feel the need to off road, or give yourself permission for a special meal/dessert, but continuing to eat sugar daily will just keep sucking you back down into the cycle of feeling bad, needing more sugar, feeling bad, punishing yourself with more sugar, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PamH Posted June 4, 2013 Share Posted June 4, 2013 I successfully completed a Whole30 in May. I did have my bad days but this is definitely the right lifestyle for me. There is no question that I'm healthier while eating paleo. Yet, I have created some kind of psychological block that isn't even allowing me to begin another Whole30 because I feel like I'm kidding myself. I don't know how to live my life without my sugar habit and while the Whole30 does give my body a break I am lacking motivation to even get started since I know I can't sustain it. I do believe that I can change but I don't know how. Just feeling really discouraged! I recently went to visit my grandmother who has dementia and I noticed little things I was doing to soothe myself during the rough visit like chewing on gum continuously and taking a drink from my sugary coffee drink every time she said something completely out of context. How would I survive without those methods of coping?? Eating sugar is the only thing that got me through several deaths in my family and it continues to be what carries me through stressful periods. I moved away from all of my friends in high school and spent the summer eating ice cream everyday. I feel as though sugar is an old and reliable friend and I can't imagine the rest of my life without it. Does/has anyone else ever felt this way? You look very young. I can tell you, being probably a few decades older (I just turned 48), that later in life the sugar REALLY makes you feel like crap. I urge you to deal with the underlying issues that lead you to turn to food to get those good feelings flooding over your brain and learn to cope in a healthier way. Whether you do it alone, with a self-help book or with a therapist, now is the time to un-do your dependency on sugar to make you feel safe. I wish you well, and congratulations on the progress you HAVE made thus far. ~Pam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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