What if I CAN'T ride my own bike?

[Jane Coaston]

i'm having a lot of issues post-whole30 (mind ended on the 1st). since then, i celebrated my 25th birthday by eating as much sugar as possible, then staying solidly paleo until the next time i encountered sugar (yesterday.)

i get so panicked when i go off whole30, like all of the weight i've lost and improvements i made will just up and vanish. i'm the smallest i've ever been in my life - around a 6/8. ten years ago, i was a 270lb high school student who never left the house and ate pounds of pasta by herself. i lost a lot of weight in college, but paleo is what really helped, and the stricter i was, the more weight i lost.

the thing is, i don't want to binge anymore. it makes me feel sick and think terribly about myself. i feel like i need to take on whole30 on a permanent basis. but at the same time, i know i need to learn how to eat without being on a "plan."

help?

[Colleen Roy]

I don't think there is anything wrong with eating "on-plan" permanently. I make a concerted effort to continue to eat according to the plan at most meals. Not EVERY meal, but most meals. I'd say we eat something off-plan 2-3 times a week now. We always feel "off" afterwards and it's nice to be able to pin-point it to a specific food. I'm totally ok with not having grains now-each time I've had them since finishing our whole30 in July, I've felt crappy. Dairy? Cheese doesn't seem to bother me, but milk/cream is not so good. No problem. I've grown to love coconut milk in my coffee. That's cool. Sadly, this applies to ice cream too...

I don't stress out if I am out and about and choose to have something off-road. It's all good because now I know exactly what to do to feel totally awesome again. And it's SO SIMPLE! We are planning on doing a whole31 in October. We'll stay mostly whole9 in November and December, then do another whole31 in January. And I think that's how it's going to be for the rest of my life. And I'm totally cool with that because I LOVE feeling healthy and in control.

So, if you need to eat according to the plan to stay in control, so be it. The plan works! Do what you need to be healthy! It's all good!

Good luck!

[Tom Denham]

The Whole30 should not become a WholeForever, but you may need to do a Whole60 or Whole90 or even a Whole120 while you develop more confidence and control with your eating.

[Laura B]

Jane! Stop...you are fine. You are healthy and I'm sure you look 10x better than your brain is letting you think. Eating sugar isn't going to make you gain 10 lbs overnight. It will do other things, but you know how to avoid that. Don't beat yourself up about it! You just have more work to do.

I was in the same position before I found the Whole 30. I was a mental wreck with body image issues. I'm still working on it...nothing gets fixed overnight, but I can find solace in the fact that my body is healthy because I have gotten it to a place where it functions properly. I don't worry about calories, sugar or measurements (especially those of my body!).

You are strong and likely beautiful, and if you need another whole 30...no biggie! Work on loving yourself and let go of what your body will do with foods. It is truly out of your control. You can try to manipulate your food intake to achieve some outcome with your body...but really you have no choice. Your body will do what it wants. Eat whole foods and stay positive and you'll be fine!

[Elleon]

I have read that it can take awhile for the mind of an overweight person to catch up with exterior physical changes... I know that I have had many periods in my adult life where I've felt insecure and yet in the pictures I see a strong, fit person. It's a shame that I didn't recognize my own strength and beauty then and wasted time with self esteem stuff. Even now on some level I know my body can do amazing things but I think about superficial stuff and feel like one cupcake will make my butt double in size, or that my midsection is still too chubby and it bounces around too much during Crossfit (like anyone at Crossfit is looking at my stomach lol... jeez). It's crazy.

And you have come so far, nourished your body to bring it to a more comfortable weight and higher level of health. My husband gave me some great advice after my last Whole 30 - he pointed out that I never celebrate my big achievements, just drive on and start thinking about other things I could be doing better. Maybe it would help if you really step back and let yourself take credit for all the hard work and taking care of yourself you've done since you were that high school girl? You've definitely worked hard and can take credit for ALL of that hard work.

[jhmomi]

It's difficult to change lifelong habits and thought patterns. Keep working on it. I wish I had taken the time to work on it when I was your age. Would have saved me a lot of grief.

My suggestion - instead of looking at this a something to try and perfect quickly, relax a bit and be kind to yourself. Create good healthy habits and choices that will support the long-term goal of being fit and healthy for the rest of your life. You would never judge one of us if we didn't "get it" completely in only 30 days. You would encourage us to get back on track, learn from our mistakes and errors, and try again! So be your own best friend and tell yourself what you would tell any one of us in your situation.

Wishing you much success as you work on your goals!

[juju]

first, take a deep breath.

second, congratulate yourself on the massive achievements you have made in a very short time.

third, it's ok to have a plan. In fact, sometimes it is better to have a plan so then you know exactly what you are going to do. I like having a plan because it takes the guesswork out of what I should do when situations arise.

I have a wheat and gluten intolerance so that one is easy to avoid due to unpleasant consequences but my achilles heel is sugar free gum. I can not have it under any circumstances because 1 piece leads to a pack and the pack leads to me standing in front of the fridge with a hunger that won't die. So, my "bike riding" includes no gum. You may need to figure out what your trigger food or foods are and stay away for a bit. The beauty is you have more than 30 days to get it sorted out...there is no time limit on improving yourself. You have made huge improvements in your life which more than off set the a sugar binge or two.

It's not how many time you get knocked down, it's how many times you get back up.

If you need to be a whole60, 90, 120 , 123.5 do it. It's ok to have rules and a plan in order to get where you need to be.

I also feel that a "plan" that says eat whole foods that nourish your body and help you achieve better health is an awesome "plan" to be on.