A Very Hungry Mommy and Baby W30 Round 2.3

[LadyM]

12 hours ago, BabyBear said:

Ah thank you for the encouragement.  One of my highest love languages is words of affirmation and though it may seem silly to some words of encouragement go a long way with me.  Honestly the past few days I felt like I was in survival mode and leaning heavily on my older boys to help out.  I have to beat off the feelings of guilt I place on myself for not being able to do it all.  Honestly though I think the having it all together expectation has taken a very unhealthy turn in our culture.  When I think back to stories of my grandparents and the reading of journals of others beyond those years when life was more family and community focused verses individual focused, moms who had it all together meant they had well trained children that assisted with family responsibilities cooking, cleaning, caring for the young, caring for the farm (family business) etc.  with that in mind if I don’t allow my older children to bear with me some of the responsibilities of the household how will they then learn to be responsible adults.  Responsible children are not robbed of a child hood, rather their child hood is more fulfilling and engaging, and will most likely produce a responsible adult.  Well sorry for the ramble, but that honestly help me unpack and toss out some of the mom guilt I was carrying.  

I have a friend who says "Asking for help is inviting people to love you," and I try to remind myself of that because asking for help is something I really struggle to do. But I think you're 100% correct in your assessment. And creating the space and expectation that your kids make a contribution makes them a part of something larger in a very meaningful way--which no doubt helps build self esteem and teaches them major life lessons that will always serve them well.

So I say throw that mom guilt down, lady! You're doing the best thing for everyone in "leaning on" others to make everything work. I'd say it looks like success in building a strong and loving family.

My primary love languages are quality time and physical touch, which is partly why long distance is extra hard for me, but the Dude's primary love language is words of affirmation--and that's an easy one for me to show. Glad I decided to say something to you! You are doing GREAT! Better, even, for actively working against the unhealthy cultural norms. . . . 

[BabyBear]

Day 13 10/17  saturday play... and feeling oh so prego

7:30 up with the toddler.  Get laundry going and food going.

9:30 2 deviled eggs (4 halves), dill pickles, cucumbers and carrots

So pregnancy cravings kicked in for breakfast. And let me just say it was wonderful.  It’s a good thing I packed up the extra eggs I made for later or I would have eaten them all.  

Life hack: to avoid eating a dozen eggs in one sitting when having made deviled eggs, only make half a dozen, that way you only eat six eggs.  Ha ha ha.    

My mom came out and we went to JC Penny as soon as it opened and did some shopping for her and my dad.  We got great deals.  She got about $800 worth of clothes for $80 We had a good time.  It’s been forever since we have had girl time.  We always have the munchkins a foot.  We also grabbed lunch at one of my favorite mom and pops that also does a good job catering to my weird diet needs when on a whole 30.  

1:00 M2 - sirloin steak, salad with tomatoes and cucumbers olive oil and some fresh squeezed  lemon juice 

After lunch we picked up the boys and headed to a pumpkin patch farm.  The line to get in was forever long, but once on the farm it wasn’t too crowded.  The toddler had an absolute blast.  He got to see the animals and play in a corn pit, then there was the tire mountain, and tire swings.  They even had an old yacht they turned into a playground.  The best was letting him walk through the pumpkin patch to pick out his pumpkin.  He walked the entire patch probably close to 2 acres tapping his finger on his cheek saying “hmmmm let’s see.”  When he finally found “his” pumpkin he carried over to the stroller proud as a peacock.  After that every person that passed us he would pat his pumpkin and tell the people “Jedi’s Pumpkin”. He was so very proud of his pumpkin.   Let’s hope he doesn’t want to sleep with it.  

Phew when we got home my body was done.  I was tired and my feet were tired.  We did sooooo much walking.  The farm was huge!  The corn maze was one of the biggest I’ve been too.  So needless to say my hubby told me to go soak when. Epsom salt bath did my body good.  I’m almost too tired to be hungry.  But if I do get hungry I’ve got some Left overs I can eat.  

[BabyBear]

@LadyMmy other main love language is physical touch, and yes yours are certainly hard with a long distant relationship.   You are a brave and wonderful person to stick it through as your “dude” takes care of his mom.  
I hope you are feeling better and on the mend.  Hopefully you’ve been able to use some time to devise a packing plan.  I’m super excited for you to get into your very own house!  

[LadyM]

12 hours ago, BabyBear said:

@LadyMmy other main love language is physical touch, and yes yours are certainly hard with a long distant relationship.   You are a brave and wonderful person to stick it through as your “dude” takes care of his mom.  
I hope you are feeling better and on the mend.  Hopefully you’ve been able to use some time to devise a packing plan.  I’m super excited for you to get into your very own house!  

Thank you so much @BabyBear! I've just been letting myself rest this weekend, but I keep thinking one box at a time, start small. . . . the good thing is I already have a lot of my packing done from when I had planned to move Sept. 1. It's mostly the kitchen and bathroom at this point. I might get started on the bathroom today. It won't take long, and it would feel like a major accomplishment. Thanks for the nudge!

[Jennifer Jensen]

BabyBear, I love your NSVs:

• Clean breakfast dishes after breakfast
• Rings are spinning on finger

That first one is one I should try. If I can get the second one to happen consistently, I will know the inflammation problem is truly under control. 

I bought some oatstraw and made an infusion last night. I had my first two cups today. Any suggestions? I just heated it up. I made it with a little rosemary added to it. I added water to my second cup because I am going through it really fast.
 

I have been on vacation - a delayed anniversary trip. That is why I haven't been on the forum. 

[Jennifer Jensen]

On 10/17/2020 at 8:30 PM, BabyBear said:

The best was letting him walk through the pumpkin patch to pick out his pumpkin.  He walked the entire patch probably close to 2 acres tapping his finger on his cheek saying “hmmmm let’s see.”  When he finally found “his” pumpkin he carried over to the stroller proud as a peacock.  After that every person that passed us he would pat his pumpkin and tell the people “Jedi’s Pumpkin”. He was so very proud of his pumpkin.   Let’s hope he doesn’t want to sleep with it.  

Love this! So cute! Miss those days.

[Jennifer Jensen]

On 10/17/2020 at 9:20 AM, LadyM said:

My primary love languages are quality time and physical touch, which is partly why long distance is extra hard for me, but the Dude's primary love language is words of affirmation--and that's an easy one for me to show.

I think I want all the love language I can get! Really I do think of affirmation as one of mine but I am trying to actually get past that because I need it too much. I need to find the affirmation within. My hubby is all about written affirmations. It's so sweet he saves them and I run across them in the oddest places. I need to write more instead of just going into the office and cheering him up. 

[Jennifer Jensen]

@BabyBear Are you okay?