Whole 30 Binge

[MeadowLily]

It takes time to know what our trigger foods are.  Mild cravings can be triggered by just a whiff or faint sniff of something we used to eat.  Seeing triggers at the grocery store or watching others eat them can set us off.  

 

Over-restriction forces ourselves to deal with chronic hunger over too long a period of time.  Over-restriction is definitely a trigger for binge eating nuts and dried fruits.  Over-restriction is pretty much self-inflicted starving.   It will cause massive cravings for pretty much everything.

 

We don't count calories or points and we eat 3 meals aday like a king.  This is the way we cope and are able to manage our cravings.  We don't eat formations  of foods that look like pancakes, crepes, waffles or smoothies.   We edge away from that slippery slope and remove ourselves from the vicious cycle of thrill eating.

[SusanB.]

Susan, I just want you to know that you most certainly CAN turn this around.  I have done it. 

 

I sure hope this is the case. Dried fruit, for me, is waaaaay down on the list of things that I find challenging though.

 

On the 30, I have found that the things I need to stay away from because, while compliant, they're just feeding into the exact same sweets-seeking/overeating behavior is anything that verges on sweet. So dried fruit, cashews, and almond butter (oh my beloved almond butter) - things I don't have trouble with when I'm eating brownies and ice cream regularly...they get elevated and become my trigger foods.

 

I'm still OK with the mixed nuts for the moment. Helps that I'm not so crazy about Brazil nuts (in the mix, not a huge proportion) - helps also that my obsessive-compulsive tendencies mean that I don't want to pick anything out and upset the "balance" of the rest of the bag. Wow, I sound quite neurotic when I say it that way.

 

But the dried fruit - I wish there was a way I could use what I need for cooking but not have it in the house otherwise - but I think that there just isn't. The curry cauliflower rice is really improved with that smattering of currants. The pot roast that called for dried figs? I subbed prunes (allergic to figs), but my cooking partner in crime bought the exact number we needed out of the bulk bin, I threw them into the blender, and that was that. Added to the complexity of the sauce, for sure.

 

All of that said, my problem is really not so much dried fruit or cashews - it's a sugar addiction that I've carried since high school (I'm in my early 40's). Is there any coming back from that? I'm the person who will mindlessly eat honey or jam from the jar when I need a fix and there isn't anything else available - although interestingly enough, I can keep those in the house during the 30 and not be the least bit tempted - they're noncompliant so they're off-limits and I can be cool with that.

 

Has anyone around here with well-developed sugar-binge eating habits really and truly conquered it? Will I ever reach a point where sweets don't appeal to me anymore? I know that normal people report reduced desire for sugar when they cut it out, but I have yet to find another binger who can convince me that they are as far gone as I am with the sugar and it became a non-issue. I know that sugar is bad and I need to stay away from it - I don't have an information problem or an intellectual problem understanding all of these things. But in reality I don't know if I really truly believe that it won't remain a struggle for me forever. Not saying that I can't successfully stay away from it - maybe I can - but will it ever just cease to be a white-knuckle ordeal?

[ladyshanny]

Hi Susan, I'd say I'm a sugar binger in that I will sneak, lie and hide my sugary binging activities and I have also been known to do it past the point of feeling extremely ill. I find that when I'm under the pull of sugar it's something else driving me, not myself.

That said, I am in a Whole30 and feeling perfectly fine. I am doing my Whole30 without fruit of any kind (fresh or dried) and no nuts. Also no mayo but that;s a different story. I know that the cauli rice is better with the dried currants or dried cranberries and I would love to make some of the recipes that call for dates or figs but I just know myself well enough and I simply don't. They are just not in my life.

I linked this article in another thread and maybe it can help you going forward: http://www.gretchenrubin.com/happiness_project/2012/10/back-by-popular-demand-are-you-an-abstainer-or-a-moderator/

It's about moderators vs abstainers and how if you are an abstainer by nature, you probably can't moderate certain things....in my case I cannot moderate any sugar at all. Once I have it completely cut off, I'm fine. If it starts to come back in, even the sugar in commercial ketchup, I get knocked down.

[SusanB.]

Helpful article, thanks so much! I think it's a version of something I've known about myself for years now but have only recently accepted is never going to change: I'm all or nothing, on or off, black or white. Manifests itself in so many ways in my life (as I like to say - if my nail polish isn't alphabetized, then my clothes might as well be on the floor).

 

I smoked casually for years, until I moved to a country where people still smoked. At the time I finally quit, I was smoking 1.5 packs of Marlboro reds or more a day, and trying (failing) to "cut back". I lit one up one evening and decided that it was gross, stubbed it out, said in front of all my coworkers (love ya, peer pressure) "I'm done with these" and that was that. The physical craving for nicotine lasted maybe 2-4 days. But I never really questioned whether I was in danger of going back to being a smoker.

 

I wish I could be this way with sugar! I guess that's not a great equivalent, because there isn't anything about smoking that you need in your daily life the way we all must eat. But I really can't moderate - no M&M's is easier than a reasonable amount, because if I have one then I risk having the whole bag in one sitting (and they can come in pretty big bags).

 

I don't mean to devalue other substance addictions, but comparing notes with a friend in (alcohol) rehab, the behaviors are so similar. Especially the secrecy and the shame/guilt.

 

I'm also really torn because I've formed much of my identity as someone who bakes. I'm the one who brings the celebratory cakes or whatever - I take great pride in bringing a smile to people's faces with something I've made. I guess I've been working with a fundamental disconnect as to whether I'll be able to bake at all again, ever. As someone who can't moderate, I can see this being just impossible - or, worse, leading to a cycle of cutting out the sugar completely vs. tanking up on it.

 

I just want so badly to not care about sugar. The way I don't care about cigarettes. The way I don't miss soda (I don't drink much alcohol, so I was a big consumer of ginger ale in bar settings - cut it out a few years ago and really don't care, even though it was something I enjoyed very much). I guess to a certain extent what I want is to be able to be a moderator as opposed to an abstainer - and that just is never going to happen.

[Brewer5]

Susan, I am also an ex-smoker and I can tell you that sugar addiction IS the same as an addiction to alcohol or nicotine.  

 

And yes, you CAN simply cut it out and move on with your life.  Yes, we need food -- but we don't need sugar.  

 

The answer to not craving it, I've found, is to not put it in my body.  And I mean all forms -- anything that is going to spike my blood sugar.  So, in addition to nuts, seeds, and butters of these... I've chosen to cut out all fruit and starchy foods.  Check out my keto log this month if you are interested in learning more.  Check out Keto Clarity, The Art and Science of Low Carbohydrate Living, Grain Brain.  

 

While this may (?) sound like an awful way to live to you -- I can tell you that it is the complete opposite for me.  I am free.  

 

Free of the guilt, the shame, the out-of-control feelings, the compulsive eating, the thinking about food all the time, the wondering "what is wrong with me?" (hint:  The answer is not that we are some sort of unique snowflake who struggles any more with sugar addiction than the other infinite number of people out there who struggle with sugar addiction.)

 

What sounds awful to me is still struggling the way so many here do.

 

If you want to stop craving sugar, you have to stop giving your body sugar.  Just like with nicotine.  Been there, done that, too.

[ladyshanny]

Haha, I was a smoker also and am so grateful every day that I kicked that habit.  Like Susan, I just decided one day that was enough and it was.  Never looked back.  And with almost no discomfort or cravings. Pointing again to the fact that I am an abstainer.  Once something is out, it's O U T.

 

Thanks Brewer, for noting about starchy carbs.  I cannot cut them out completely because I feel horrible with headaches and worse menstrual cramps and dizzy etc.  What I did notice this weekend though was that I had baked a Japanese sweet potato and very nearly felt the big sugar-dragon-pile-on.  Basically they were just too much like eating...well....almost like eating firm pudding.  I do not have that reaction with regular orange sweet potatoes...so the purple ones are out based on my physiological response.  I also do not eat any fruit and I do not eat nuts or nut butters, all for the same reason.

 

It's such a process to really and truly abstain permanently from sugar and I think it's more of a 2 steps forward one back, 3 steps forward one back, 4 steps forward one back etc.  Because it's just everywhere.  Smoking now is generally widely known as unhealthy and you can't smoke almost anywhere.  It's seen as shameful and dirty.  Eating sugar is seen as happy and celebratory and deserving and pretty and fancy.  Until we sugar addicts can see sugar for the toxic drug that nicotine is, we just keep trying....and eventually we are better than we were and closer to healing.  Keep on keeping on!

[Coopsmama]

I needed ALL of this tonight!! I'm on day 20 and up until today I have been feeling fantastic. Today I was tired and found myself wanting sugar! Prior to Whole30, I would reward myself with a treat ( or 2,3,4...) daily. I felt free of this feeling while on my Whole30 journey. Until this afternoon! I am going to do another round after I complete this one, but will not allow cashews or dried mangos back into my house! These are trigger foods for me. Thank you all for sharing your stories and advice!

[JJtraveler]

oh man. I'm on day 15ish (started the 7th of Jan) and I've been noticing I did well the first few days w/no snacks and little 'swypo' type stuff, but the raisins have been creeping in. they're the only dried fruit at the moment, and I'm going to have to stop.them.entirely. because they're definitely interfering with my re-setting the sugar dragon. That was my #1 reason for doing w30.

 

I ate a little 'dessert' a couple of nights ago with a dozen or so raisins and a few cacao nibs. it was approved stuff and eaten with a meal, and not even a binge, but afterward I realized I was heading down a slippery slope with that one.

 

dried fruit is a risk factor for me. I don't think quite as much as for a couple others of you, but I appreciate your sharing because it is making me pay more attention to my own issue.

 

Thank you!

 

Off to plan myself some meals-with-no-snacks days.