frantastic Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 I hesitate to say that I'm "happy" to hear that others share my struggle, so I will instead say that it's nice to know that I'm not alone. I have been on one "diet" or another most of my life (the first diet I remember was around the age of 8). I'm now 43, and they all tend to blend into a big mishmash of do-this don't-do-that to the point that my brain goes into overload. You hit the nail on the head. The only failure is to not try. Keep fighting the good fight! You're fighting for the best possible cause - yourself!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted August 28, 2014 Author Share Posted August 28, 2014 You know, I keep coming back to this journal. I could let it go. I could forget about it. But I keep coming back. For one thing, the support is incredible but we know there's good support on other sites. That's not it alone. I think it's reading the success stories and my inner heart wanting to make that 30 day mark. Obviously I haven't so I don't want to shine anyone on. I think I need to really sit down with my head and my heart and see if we can't come to terms. My heart wants to Whole30 and my head wants to do something else entirely. Alternatively, my head "gets" the logic in Whole30 but my heart wants to explore other stuff. What a mess, eh? Oh well. I'll be here and there along the way until such time as I can say: Enough. Basta! Do this thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissie Posted August 30, 2014 Share Posted August 30, 2014 Awwww, one day, eh? The freedom to just eat good food will be yours! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 12, 2014 Author Share Posted September 12, 2014 Good Friday to you all. MeadowLily came and brought me back, the vixen. I think you probably have figured out by now that the Whole30 attempt failed and failed spectacularly. The next few weeks are going to be horrifically impossible to navigate even without attempting a Whole30 so I am looking at doing a push on October 1. I'll practice some Whole30 compliant meals/recipes in the interim where I can just so I have a portfolio to call upon for those 30 days...mostly the weekends. I don't cook on the weeknights. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 18, 2014 Author Share Posted September 18, 2014 Today is another day of reflection. I'm beginning to "get it" as they say. Though I haven't yet begun my new Whole30 (sighs from the crowd, applause from the people tired of hearing about it), I am beginning to see the psychological power that food holds over me...and dieting in general. And this is a chicken/egg type of thing. Which came first? And then add to all that my own issues with my self image: Never pretty enough, never thin enough, never smart enough. All self-imposed. And dysfunctional. Today, after a few days of "cleaner" eating, I 've kind of come to a moment in time where it seems to me that a Whole30 is truly do-able, that it would make me feel great and that I can choose to complete it. Hopefully that stays with me. Hopefully I come back and read this. 1. It's 30 days. It's not a lifetime. 2. I'm sick to death of counting, calculating, weighing and obsessing. Fortunately, in the last 3 days I've done none of that and it's been liberating. 3. Whole30 simplifies my life. It's easy to feel as though it complicates it (OMG I HAVE TO DO A WEEKEND COOKUP!) but that's just not so. If I choose to cook on a weekend, great. But honestly? If I don't do a cook up on a weekend, there is STILL food to be had. This lightens my heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissie Posted September 19, 2014 Share Posted September 19, 2014 Power to you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeadowLily Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 Today is another day of reflection. I'm beginning to "get it" as they say. Though I haven't yet begun my new Whole30 (sighs from the crowd, applause from the people tired of hearing about it), I am beginning to see the psychological power that food holds over me...and dieting in general. And this is a chicken/egg type of thing. Which came first? And then add to all that my own issues with my self image: Never pretty enough, never thin enough, never smart enough. All self-imposed. And dysfunctional. Today, after a few days of "cleaner" eating, I 've kind of come to a moment in time where it seems to me that a Whole30 is truly do-able, that it would make me feel great and that I can choose to complete it. Hopefully that stays with me. Hopefully I come back and read this. 1. It's 30 days. It's not a lifetime. 2. I'm sick to death of counting, calculating, weighing and obsessing. Fortunately, in the last 3 days I've done none of that and it's been liberating. 3. Whole30 simplifies my life. It's easy to feel as though it complicates it (OMG I HAVE TO DO A WEEKEND COOKUP!) but that's just not so. If I choose to cook on a weekend, great. But honestly? If I don't do a cook up on a weekend, there is STILL food to be had. This lightens my heart. Tinman - Everything you write, lightens my heart. You're so real and authentic. I always look for your posts and wonder how you're getting along. I'm reminded of a particular post from a Moderator who said they've never done meal plans. Me neither, Tinman. I don't do weekend cook-a-thons. I wing it. I do think about a day...but suppertime can change in the blink of an eye. I've made many more recipes because I didn't want to get into a food rut. My sister came for a visit and we talked about her past experiences with "the ww". We've discussed that...how there are certain things you will not do because it's just too darned "ww-ery". My sis gets that. She asked me for a Whole 30 book and I made her a Whole 30 Kit. It was really fun. I put all of the basics in there that didn't require any refrigeration. I wrapped it up and gave it to her for a birthday present. I bought brazil nuts, hazelnuts, good tuna, coconut products, macadamia nut oil, large dried coconut chips and the Whole 30 book. She had been attending those meetings over the course of many years. The same people would be there, year after year....trying to lose the same weight they started out with 10 years ago. Sis began to question, why am I here and why I am doing this to myself. "I can't stand this!" So I explained the basic rules. She had to drive many miles home. She thought and I'm sure this will be forthcoming at some point.....wouldn't it be great if there was a Whole 30 book on CD for listening to in the vehicle. Yeah, Sis. Great idea! I showed her the photos of the authors and these threads. "They look so vibrant and full of life". Yeah, they really, really do. She read the story about the two gals in the camper. That's one of my favorite stories. If they can do it, anyone can. Tinman, I think you're lovely. Your posts always touch my heart. http://whole30.com/?s=We+live+in+a+camper Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 You're a sweetie, Lily. You put me to shame by your consistency and your constancy. I hereby declare October 1 as the start of my first complete Whole30 and I'm going to dedicate it to you and of course the others who have supported my rather meandering journey. I told my husband today that October 1 was going to be "so-called clean eating". I figured it was easier to put it that way than to describe what it is I WON'T be eating. He's the kind of guy who'll go get some chocolates and toss one into my lap. Because of his health conditions I can't pushing over into doing this with me without endangering him. But on the other hand, I can't just postpone this indefinitely. I think it's immensely important to try it and then consider what it is that I've accomplished -- beyond "sticking it out". Anyway -- thanks, Lily. I really appreciate you checking up on me. I'm in a good space right now and looking forward to October. I have some business travel mid-month but I really don't have a lot of issues with traveling and food. I keep it simple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 23, 2014 Author Share Posted September 23, 2014 Wow. That was harder than I thought it would be. And I basically did it the "chicken" way. Background: My long suffering husband has watched me on my carousel of different diet programs, eating methods, etc etc. for the 12+ years we've been together. He is so confused about what I eat at any one time that he really sometimes looks quite cute as he says "are you eating this today?" and then I want to smack him because he said "Are you eating this today?" and I get miffed because he's "not being supportive". Well: who can blame him, really? How does he know how to support me if I'm changing my mind every other day? Poor guy. So today as I was thinking ahead to October 1 and Day 1, I felt I owed it to the guy to let him know the rules. And be self-effacing and honest about the fact that I've been jerking around for 11 years (I was thin when I met him). To be fair to me, he's not the easiest guy in the world to be with when changing how I eat because he actually enjoys tempting me or offering me things he knows I love. That's a bad and a good thing. He is an imp at times. Long story short (TOO LATE!): I emailed him the Whole30 rules. Yes. What I was avoiding. I have been skirting around the fact that I'm not eating this that and the other thing as I've been pretty paleo at times. But now it's just time to let the facts be know. THIS is what I am trying. I hope to make it for 30 days of a reset. And I know it's going to be hard. But at least I told him the rules. What a weirdo I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 24, 2014 Author Share Posted September 24, 2014 As I suspected, himself had nothing to say regarding my email to him. You see, I can't speak as well as I can write so it's easier for me to compose my thoughts in the form of writing. Especially when I deal with people who interrupt me. Don't get the idea that I'm a frail hot house orchid who can't stand up for herself. Not at all. But I'm not a clever debater. I'm a whiz at opining though and have a fairly strong vocabulary. All that to defend what may be viewed as "passive aggressive" when in fact it truly is informative. But he won't comment upon my decision. That's how he rolls. Now: if he can at least bring himself to not toss chocolates into my lap at night or wave bagels and cream cheese at me, I'm good. I'll call that "supportive". But ultimately, while it would be great to have support from him, it's not something that is mine by right. He's either cool with it or not and regardless of whether I receive support or not, I need to do this for myself. Support from family members and friends is a luxury. On a side note, I'm ready and excited to begin this Whole30 because now I feel all Honest and Open about the whole thing whereas in the past I hesitated to tell him how much I was actually NOT eating for fear of having to debate the merits of avoiding WHOLE GRAINS (the magic bullet). Fortunately he doesn't eat those unless he pops a can of corn open. *le sigh* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissie Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 That's really touching honesty. I always frame the perfect reply about 2 days after a challenge ! I got my support from here. My daughter still thinks I'll become ill, if I don't eat 'normal food', she is so sold on conventional wisdom. What's that? Oh yes, the normal, healthy adulterated stuff which made me obese, gave me gut-ache and inflamed my body!!!!!! I hope your 30 days bring you joy and health. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 28, 2014 Author Share Posted September 28, 2014 Good lord. I cannot wait for Day One. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 29, 2014 Author Share Posted September 29, 2014 September 30 is my Day One. I can't wait another day. My allergies, skin, bloat, and joints are crying out for reform. So that's it. Day zero here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 29, 2014 Author Share Posted September 29, 2014 , the normal, healthy adulterated stuff which made me obese, gave me gut-ache and inflamed my body!!!!!! I hope your 30 days bring you joy and health. The gut ache! Yes! I've spent five days with time to recognize the gut ache! Not being at work and of course eating vacation food, suddenly, I became hyper-aware of the ill effects of my choices. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissie Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Day 1 going great for you? Only 29 left to realise you don't need to restrict good food, count points etc, you'll be free!!!!! And your body will feel good tooooo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 I just woke up so Day 1 has just started! My last day on vacation but I'm ready to do it. Make some soup, some spaghetti squash and I'll be set for the remainder of the work week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 I've written my goals out and finished breakfast. Among the goals are obviously physical items I'd love to see diminished. Allergies, joint pain, gas, stomach pain, moods. I am reminded of these as I sit here post-coffee nursing a gassy stomach. Urk. Ah well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissie Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Ahhhh, get ready for the calm, it is only weeks away, and so worth it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h e a t h e r Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Hi tinman57, hope you don't mind my popping in here. Congrats and good luck on day 1!! Thought I might offer an unsolicited suggestion. Do you think posting a kind of Whole 30 countdown calendar with the list of your goals and a copy of the template rules on your fridge or somewhere conspicuous might help your hubby stay aware of your reset progress? Keep him involved in a way? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 Funny! I just finished making my soup and walked in and said, "Day One! Twenty- nine to go!" I like the idea of a calendar. So maybe I'll find something to print and post. Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 Well Day One for the Umpteenth Time is over. And well handled and enjoyed. Overnight I had a lot of stomach griping and sweating going on but I wasn't sure if that was due to not drinking wine, not eating grains etc or not eating enough. I know I have to kind of wait for things to even out for a bit before I make an adjustment and that's fine. Printed out my Eeyore 30 Day countdown calendar for the fridge. I like Eeyore. I figure maybe at the end I'll do Tigger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 Ooof. It really is true: how sucky you feel in the early days is directly related to what you did to yourself before you started. I went for a run at lunch and had to shorten it because of my gut ache. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted October 2, 2014 Author Share Posted October 2, 2014 Day 3. Not to get all bloggy about it but I had an overwhelming sense of satisfaction this morning as I whipped up some eggplant-less chicken ratatouille for breakfast. I smugly packed my spicy tuna cakes (Nom Nom Paleo) and my silky Ginger Zucchini soup (Well Fed 2) along with some side veggies for lunch. Though I am tired and still dealing with stomach issues, I am struck by how good doing something you know is good for you feels. KWIM? Tomorrow is the traditional date night. I am reminding myself to tell my husband "With the exception of pizza, I can find something to eat at any of our usual places... or I can bring something in for you and whip up an omelet for myself." It's a plan. It's not much of a plan but it's a plan. I updated my Facebook page with a cover photo of "Doing a whole30" graphic and I'm mostly staying away from my WW friends whose conversations tend to revolve around negativity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissie Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 Great! it sounds as though you have caught it at last! I'm just finishing a W7 after ingesting wheat - never again! ('till I forget what it does to my insides ) I'm off on holiday on Saturday, but can manage my food, I so enjoy the W30 way! . Enjoy your date night Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted October 2, 2014 Author Share Posted October 2, 2014 I'm just finishing a W7 after ingesting wheat - never again! ('till I forget what it does to my insides ) Why do we do this to ourselves? :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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