Jen's Post W30 Log

[mcjule]

Jen, I'm with you on the wine.  If I'm going to drink it, it better be something I like!  Otherwise, what a waste!

 

Pretty cakes almost NEVER taste good.  That is a lesson I have learned.  

[Physibeth]

On the wine and hostess thing...my husband and I don't drink and we don't really do alcohol in our home. We are very polite and upfront about this with people when they come over and I've never had anyone have a problem with it. We also don't make a big deal when we are invited into the homes of people that do drink and just politely decline. (side note - my mother in law still hasn't figured this out which I find hilarious). The point being is that most people I would hope have been taught that being a good guest means rolling with the rhythms of the home they are invited into. Part of this process is breaking down the social norms surrounding food and beverage. 

[pjena]

Good points, all, Bethany!

 

So, the night after the low fat dinner day, we had salmon and olive oil on the asparagus.  I did not add more fat than that.  I was more satisfied after dinner and didn't get hungry later.  Good info.

 

I had a bunch of bananas going brown so I made banana bread yesterday.  I made a regular and a Paleo version.  Both were sweetened less than normal with maple syrup.  I tasted both.  I'm not counting it against NS because, well, I'm just not.  It was the cook's duty to taste them.   The reason I bring it up is to note that after tasting a bit of both, I felt like I WANT MORE NOW!!!!!!  I don't know if it was the bit of sugar, a psychological reaction to "bread" or the gluten in the non-Paleo one.  But, it was a strong desire to just keep eating that banana bread.  I resisted and don't plan to indulge more.  Just interesting to note and a good reminder to keep avoiding muffin-y type things.

 

Weekend plans include dinner out and a grad party.  And a soccer tournament.  I plan to fully enjoy dinner out.  The restaurant has my favorite wine, which is not common at restaurants around here, so I may indulge there.  But, no dessert.  I won't eat at the grad party.  It's not at a normal meal time anyway.  And pretty cakes don't taste as good as they look.    The tournament might make some meal times awkward, but we'll work through it and I'm much more able to handle waiting longer for a meal than I would have been before W30.

[mcjule]

Jen, I have the SAME problem with baked goods.  I love baking and used to do it all the time but I have trouble stopping myself.  If I make it but don't eat any I'm fine but when I have a "small bite" it usually turns into lots of small bites.

 

Following your experiments with lower fat . . . very insightful!

[pjena]

Happy Monday!

 

We had a nice weekend.  Fri/Sat were all about soccer.  We got a storm Sat morning which threw the whole day's schedule into chaos so we just had to go with the flow as they moved around games and fields which isn't my preference, but I managed.  Sun was more laid back with time for Father's Day activities.  13yo pretty much just sat around, sore after playing 4 soccer games in less than 24 hours.  And kind of down from losing 4 soccer games in less than 24 hours.   10yo is all about making homemade fishing reels right now.  He's been making pop can fishing reels from a youtube video and then made up his own water bottle fishing reel.  I love that he's doing something creative and outside and not video games!

 

Food was up and down. 

 

I got into the banana bread again.  Like mcjule said, I just can't have baked goods around.  Once I take a bite, I'm done.  I know that, but I keep testing it for some reason.  I am counting it as one of my exceptions now as it was more than a taste by the cook to make sure it was ok.  From the point that it was homemade, very good and fun to be able to bake, I'd say it was worth it.  At least more worth it than stale cake in the break room or even fresh cake at the grad party.  From the point that I didn't intend to eat it, it wasn't.  Moving on. 

 

Dinner out was fun but I ate way too much.  Need to watch the portions.  Especially when it involves sweet potato fries.   Also had a glass of my favorite wine.  That was worth it.

 

Ate some of the popcorn I made for the kids one night.  Not much, but butter doesn't make me feel great.

 

Didn't eat anything at the grad party.  With the crazy schedule Saturday, we ended up just dropping in for a few minutes anyway.  Husband and 10yo still managed to put away big plates of food, though. 

 

For Father's Day, I made eggs Benedict for lunch.  It was good, but oh so rich!  Definitely very high fat.  And too much.  I felt tired and ugh after.  Again, butter doesn't make me feel great.  Maybe should have tried to use ghee instead?  Not sure that would have helped.  Anyway, I felt better by dinner, when I made ribs, which were delicious.  Ate too many (3 apparently is too many...).  Managed to skip the Father's Day sundaes with no problem.

 

Finally, AF started today so bloaty and a bit crampy today. 

 

Despite all of that, my weight is stable and my pants fit.  I'm actually thinking that maybe it was AF that got me into the banana bread and maybe AF bloatiness that made me feel way too full after my meals.  Maybe I didn't eat as much as I thought I did.  Bodies are weird.  There have been plenty of weekends where I knew I didn't overeat or eat anything that doesn't agree with me but just looking at something bad seemed to make me gain 5 lbs.  And then a weekend where almost every meal felt like too much and ate plenty off plan and I stayed stable.  So weird.  Goal is calm and not to let either scenario get to me.  Just happy when most of my pants fit.

 

Moving on.  This week is crazy busy and will require some creativity to maintain good meal times.  But, I'm good at planning.    Tonight I'll be going straight from work to the kids' dentist appt to soccer to yoga so brought a salad to eat for dinner at soccer. 

 

Have a good week, all!

[SaraRuns]

Loving your commitment to authenticity, or at least that's what your log is looking like to me.  Owning the things you are eating, owning the things you are doing even if not entirely happy with it, and moving on.  And having your pants fit is huge to feeling good about life.  Tight pants make me miserable every time.

 

Good luck with your busy week, but I know that you, as a fellow planner, will iron it all out.

 

Keep calm! 

[mcjule]

Despite all of that, my weight is stable and my pants fit.  I'm actually thinking that maybe it was AF that got me into the banana bread and maybe AF bloatiness that made me feel way too full after my meals.  Maybe I didn't eat as much as I thought I did.  Bodies are weird.  There have been plenty of weekends where I knew I didn't overeat or eat anything that doesn't agree with me but just looking at something bad seemed to make me gain 5 lbs.  And then a weekend where almost every meal felt like too much and ate plenty off plan and I stayed stable.  So weird.  Goal is calm and not to let either scenario get to me.  Just happy when most of my pants fit.

 

 

Yes yes yes!  This happens to me all the time.  A good reminder since I'm expected AF too any day.  I know I'll be craving more "comfort food" which for me is more carb-heavy food (potatoes, popcorn, rice).  I know I'll get bloated and feel yucky but it won't be about my food.

 

Good luck this week!

[LadyM]

It is crazy making that there is sometimes little to no direct cause and effect to our weight and how we feel in our bodies. But yes, AF is always the likely culprit when things seem off.

 

Summer is for enjoying, and it sounds like exactly what you're doing. Cheers to that!

[pjena]

Happy Monday again!  Crazy busy week last week.  I managed to eat pretty well despite the scheduling issues.  Broccoli slaw salad Monday night gave me some tummy upset early in the week.  Went out to dinner Thursday night and had a salad that had cheese on it.  Had a little tummy upset from that.  Kind of snacked my way through yesterday and though felt fine, was up at 345am hungry.  Should have made time to have a real meal.  Other than those little things, it's all good.  I'm so tired, though!  8 hours away from home yesterday taking 10yo to camp.  Ugh!  And then up at 345am fretting about him being away, back kind of hurting from the car trip, hungry and husband snoring.  It's going to be a long day.  I'm hoping to get out early enough to go to yoga.  It's not  my favorite yoga, but soccer and scouts tonight won't allow for that so hoping to get it in while I can. 

 

This week is also fairly busy with dinner out Tues and Thurs and then the holiday so I'll have to be careful to make good choices but still enjoy myself.  Tues is a rare kid free night.  10yo is at camp and 13yo has a sleepover for his bff's birthday.  So, husband and I will walk or bike to a nearby restaurant for dinner. Plan to order normal for me and skip the alcohol/sweets.  Thurs is a double date with our bff family (13yos having another sleepover and 10yos still at camp) at one of my fav restaurants.  Planning on cocktails and possibly dessert #3.  If I have dessert Thurs, I'll skip it on the weekend.  Otherwise, if there's something worth it at the 4th festivities, I'll do it there.  But, one of the two events.  Not both.  I'll probably skip the alcohol on the 4th, too.  I'm not a fire works fan so will probably head in when they all go out on the boats to watch fireworks anyway.  That's the plan!

 

I hope everyone has a nice week!

[SaraRuns]

Enjoy your dinners out, sounds like fun.  And the 4th festivities, of course.  We'll be having our own fireworks display, typical for my son's birthday, which is so close to the 4th.

 

Hope you can get to bed early tonight.

[LadyM]

Sounds like a fantastic plan. I love the idea of discerning the times to indulge and then appreciating them even more because they're rare and carefully chosen.

 

I hope you enjoyed yoga and that your back fully recovers. All my driving is giving mine fits, too. But we do what we can, live with it, and move on. Taking some time every day to stretch the psoas and stabilize the SI helps a little.

[pjena]

Dinner out last night was fun.  Husband and I walked to a Mexican restaurant near our house and sat on the patio.  I had shrimp fajitas with guac and skipped the cheese and tortillas.  I brought my own kombucha.  I felt normal last night and was hungry this morning, good signs of a good choice.

 

Today is a normal day with no food challenges, which I will take advantage of given the challenges to come this weekend. 

 

Went to not my fav yoga Monday before soccer/scouts and Tuesday before dinner out.  I missed my fav teachers, who teach later than I could go, but I'm grateful I was able to get there.  They're closed all weekend, so I won't get my usual Fr/Sat/Sun yoga.    Next week, I plan to go to all the yoga!  The week after that we will be hosting 2 13yo soccer players from Haiti during a big week-long soccer tournament and between their soccer games, my son's soccer games and all of the joint team activities that week, I don't think yoga will happen.  Plus, I still have to work.  I'm not sure how it will all work out... 

[LadyM]

Great job, Jen! Cheers to all the yoga next week and making it through the rest!

[SaraRuns]

Getting in all the yoga next week sounds like a good plan.  You are going to be crazy the week after, good luck.  Sounds like you need a sabbatical that week. 

 

Oh and a Mexican dinner out on the patio sounds fab.

[pjena]

Well, I failed miserably.  Sigh.  Thursday dinner was fine.  One cocktail, no dessert, good choices.  That was the last good day.  The kids picked berries last week so Friday night I made a berry crisp and ate some, thinking that would be my exception.  Nope.  I then went on to eat all the desserts all weekend.  It was bad.  I have a sore tummy.  I really hate that the sweets still get me like that.  Once I start, it's all over and I can't stop.  I hate that!  Anyway, there's nothing I can do about it now, so I'm moving on.  It's not worth beating myself up over.  I am going to just divide the summer into 2.  I had 2 NS exceptions in May/June and will give myself 2 for the rest of July/August. 

 

Other than that, the weekend was pretty good.  I got 10yo back from camp Friday.  Long day in the car, but fun to hear all of their stories.  They had a good time and all said they'd go again.  10yo was SO tired Friday night!.  I spent Saturday in between parties canning jam.  Apparently, running the gas range all day long in a sealed up house is a bad thing so then we spent 3 hours AFTER fireworks standing in the driveway while they tried to figure out why the CO detector was going off.  Sigh.  They couldn't figure out where it was coming from so they determined it was due to the gas range running with the house sealed up and the "inversion" outside due to the forest fires.  We opened all the windows and went to bed.  Lesson learned - next time run the vent or open a window.  Then, we had storms last night.  So, I am TIRED!  Not a good way to start a Monday.  We have a fairly easy week, I think, though, so the plan is to eat simply and good, go to lots of yoga and get lots of rest.  Next week will be crazy.

 

I hope everyone else had a nice weekend.  And made better choices than I did!

[SaraRuns]

Ugh, sorry about the food fail.  But glad to see you are moving on and back to calm eating.  I like the idea of dividing the summer in half.

 

And double ugh on being stuck out of your house.  What a mess!  Hope you make it through today and get some good sleep tonight.

[LadyM]

Sounds like a holiday weekend to me!

 

I really hope you're not beating yourself up over the desserts. The way I see it is it's more useful information, nothing to be mad about, really, Sugar is a drug and desserts are foods without brakes except for the rare instances in which you deliberately choose them and contain them. You know what works, you make it work for you the vast majority of the time, and you overdid it this holiday weekend. No big deal. Back to what works and doing it because you love yourself.

 

Also, I say all of this for myself as much as for you. I had a similar off the rails experience that I'll share on my log. The fact is the sugar dragon will always live in us, and it's our job to keep it dormant as long as we desire to be free of its ill effects. It's a part of us that needs to be managed, that's all.

[pjena]

Thanks, both.  I'm not beating myself up over it.  Promise.  I'm just disappointed.  All I can do, though, is get back on track with normal, calm eating.  So, that's what I'm doing.  It's not worth dwelling on.  I will likely never be able to eat sweets in moderation, so my best bet is to keep on doing what I've been doing - avoid them almost all the time and do my best to contain a few, worth it, exceptions.  And I need to remember that while one piece of something might be worth it, ten pieces is NOT worth it and, as one becomes ten, one is therefore not worth it.

[SaraRuns]

We will always be works in progress.

[pjena]

Another weekend.  Luckily, there aren't any tempting plans.  In fact, there are no plans on the calendar except yoga.    I'm trying to keep it that way.  On Monday, the chaos begins.  Yikes!  I'm not ready.  I'm trying to just let go and go with the flow and not worry about it but I've been up at night fretting.  I don't like not being in control and I don't like being too busy and I don't like extra pressure.  I've spent so much effort over the past couple years striving for calm not just in my food but in everything.  Next week will challenge that, for sure.  It's the big week long soccer tournament.  Not only is it chaotic with my son playing, but we've somehow been convinced to host 2 kids from Haiti!  They are 13yo and most of their team is hosting with others from my son's team.  It'll be fun and a great experience, I'm sure, but I really don't know how working mom's can deal with it.  There are games every day for both teams so we have double the running for that.  There are also team and tournament events each night.  And, of course, husband has city council, scouts and other meetings each night.  He's skipping the ones he can, but it's still mostly on me.  On top of that, I don't know if the kids will speak English or know anything about America.  The coordinator lady said sometimes when hosting kids from other countries, you have to show them how to flush a toilet.  That just makes me feel overwhelmed with what else they might not know.  I really want them to have a nice time and feel comfortable.  I can just go to work and not worry about my kids - they will feed themselves, get themselves ready, etc.  But, host kids won't know what to do.  And, our nanny is off M-W at a family reunion.  Not good timing there.  Husband's sister, a school teacher, has agreed to help during the day T-W, getting them all to their games and maybe doing something fun.  She played soccer, too, and has ref'd up at this tournament, so she knows her way around and won't be overwhelmed by the chaos up there.  That's a bonus.  I have to remember they all need downtime, too.  I don't have to fill every minute.  In fact, playing soccer in the July sun, they need downtime even more. Anyway, sorry for the non W30 related rant.  Obviously, it's been on my mind.

 

Back to more relevant topics, food for the weekend should be normal and simple and not planning anything complicated.  Same for next week.  Lot's of easy.  For me, that means salads, eggs and kale.  My weight is mostly back to where it was pre 4th wknd.  AF is coming soon, so that's probably the difference.  And digestion, sore tummy, etc, is back to normal.  So, no harm done.  There are figs at Trader Joe's!  They aren't great yet, but still fun to see them.  I would move to CA just for the fresh figs alone.  I love figs!  Luckily, my kids HATE figs so I get them all to myself.

 

Have a great weekend, all!

[LadyM]

I bought a truckload of fresh figs at Costco a few weeks ago. Such a treat!

 

Maybe the kids you're hosting will surprise you. Do your yoga and relax. Fretting won't do anything to help prepare you, but calming your mind will! Hope it goes better than expected and you can let go until you're in the moment to moment. Good luck, Jen, and enjoy your weekend!

[mcjule]

Sound like a lot but you are preparing well for the chaos!  Hope your weekend is nice and calm and puts you in a good mindset for next week!

[pjena]

Thanks for the support.  I know in my head that fretting doesn't help, but it's hard to stop.  We finally got the game schedule yesterday and that helped my sanity immensely.  I can at least plan coverage.  I studied French all through high school and college (and have a BA in it) so that should help, even though I've forgotten most of it and they likely speak Creole which is somewhat like, but not exactly, French.  I put a translator app on my phone, too.  I'm sure they're more nervous than I am!

[LadyM]

I have a feeling you're going to enjoy reconnecting with your inner Francophile. How fun!

[SaraRuns]

Yum, figs!

 

I hope you got lots of yoga and lots of calm this past weekend.

 

I hope all goes well this week and that the host kids have a blast.  Knowing our similarities, I know how being able to plan is huge, and it sounds like you have things in order for a great week.  And then hopefully you'll be able to get back to calm!  Good luck!