jhmomi

You know someone is doing a Whole30 when...

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You play the 'Nope' 'Nope' 'Nope' 'Yep' 'Nope' game while the person in front of you is putting their groceries on the belt, and calculate that if you removed all the non-food, their bill would be $16.

____________________________

 

I wasn't doing this but I'm going to start!

 

Before I started buying all my veggies at the market, I would strut through the supermarket and was that person who would stand smugly in line at the checkout, glorying in having the healthiest trolley there.

 

Now I slink through trying not to catch anyone's eye because my trolley usually has meat, meat, more meat, some butter for turning into ghee, sugar and tea for kombucha, if I'm extra lucky a pack of tampons, oh, and did I mention the meat?  Not a green thing in sight.  Everyone is looking at my trolley doing the "wtf mate" raised eyebrow.

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Ahah right. I am guilty playing another game called "what can I cook from a stranger's shopping cart contents".

I LOVE faces of people standing behind me when I unload liver, hearts, kidneys and such at my Asian store. They probably think I am assembling frankencow in a lab later on.

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Ha, I went to my meat co-op today and left with $90 (less my rocking 10% meat CSA discount!) worth of grass-fed and/or organic beef.  The guy that rang me up was very nice and when I was about to leave, this was our conversation:

 

Him: Enjoy your cookout!

Me: Huh?

Him: I assumed that you're cooking out with such a large purchase?

Me: Nope, that's just for me for the next few weeks.

Him and a few customers in the shop: [surprised look their faces.]  Oh.

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Wow, that is...quite the seaweed sheet. Yes? 

 

I'm not W30 right now (moving in less than 4 weeks! Gotta use up the food!) but these make me laugh a lot.

 

Me: I think I need to supplement my magnesium.

Hubby: Why? What's it do for you?

Me: (reads off of list of things it could help) Well, better sleeping, the racing heart/palpitations I notice sometimes might go away, muscle cramps, easier PMS symptoms...

Hubby: Yes. Yes. Now. Do it now.

 

Guess who's on a Zinc/Magnesium/Calcium/D3 supplement and just bought almonds to help supplement too? :-D I've been trying to figure out this heart thing on my own for a while (if I say anything at work I won't ever be able to fly again, which is why I'm trying to get it myself first), and lately my PMS (since stopping my BC) has been off the charts. 

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I consider myself a woman of great strength after standing in line at Trader Joe's for what seems like forever (slow checkout in front of me) while a woman went on and on and on about how she can get 100 bananas for .19 cents each and that is her food for the whole week and not turning around, slapping her across the face, and demanding she eat some meat! I'm definitely one of those silently judging others carts. Though when I go to Fred Meyer I'm sure they think I'm bipolar because half of my food is healthy stuff from the organic section and half of it is the crap SAD food that my husband eats. 

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--- For some inexplicable reason they spend their afternoon off work cleaning out the oven. Yep, that was me this week! Crazy stuff!  ;)

Were you by any chance scraping up charred sweet potato remnants from the bottom of the oven? I've got a bit of that!

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Were you by any chance scraping up charred sweet potato remnants from the bottom of the oven? I've got a bit of that!

Certainly some of that and some overflow from roasting pork belly I think!

Now to make some more mess!

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When you pick up 6, 18 count cartons of eggs (family of 7 here!)

 

When you want to cry because none of the ham your grocery store is, ya know, actually just.... ham.

 

You read the ingredients in the can of "Pure almond paste" and want to take a picture and post it on Twitter with, "Reallly?!?!" because apparently sugar is "pure almond."

 

You buy the entire stock of TWO brands of coconut milk, and still wonder if you bought enough.

 

Oh, and I went grocery shopping earlier after reading this thread, and my store was OUT OF SWEET POTATOES! The stocker looked at me like I was a little crazy when I asked him if e knew wen they would be back in stock. (Answer: no idea. The nerve.)

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.... They are constantly baking sweet potatoes at random intervals to make sure they are supplied for post WOD snack at all times.

To quote on of my favorite (late) comedians, Mitch Hedberg,

"It takes forever to cook a baked potato in a conventional oven. Sometimes I just throw one in there, even if I don't want one. Cause by the time it's done, who knows?"

(Its much funnier by his delivery.)

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Couple more I'm finding: 

 

1. You always have a mason jar of coconut milk in the fridge

2. Farmer's market vendors save stuff for you

3. You are constantly running out of chili powder, paprika, and cumin. (I showed my spices to my father in law yesterday and he said 'Its like a SPICE LIBRARY!' This filled me with glee.

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Annabel - how???!? Haha, seriously, every time I make something with cumin I'm always just a touch short. Never enough to notice, but to the point that it's no longer 2tsp of cumin in it, it's 1.25 or something. And if something has cumin, it almost always has other things in it too to help cover the flavor. But still. I've used 3 packs/jars of cumin in 2 months. 

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I've had all the lymph nodes in my left arm removed and was getting mild lymphoedema. the hospital fitted me with a really tight sleeve to wear. My daughter goes "Oh mum, it's making your hand swell up, it looks a lot fatter". I swear my first thought was "Yeah - that's the hand i use to measure my protein and fat" :D

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