Physibeth Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 Ugh no fun at all. Don't eat those cake pops! Send them off to the kids that were going to come to the party anyway or something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 8, 2013 Author Share Posted August 8, 2013 LOL Don't worry. I don't even want a cake pop. I want something good. I'm still resisting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 8, 2013 Author Share Posted August 8, 2013 A for Wednesday especially given the circumstances. I was very hungry around 9:30, so I had a banana. I am ok with that. I thought about eating my tuna salad and was hungry enough for that (the fish and broc test), but then I'd have had to figure out a different lunch for today. Turns out I should have made a bigger meal, though. I woke up at 3 and couldn't sleep and was hungry, so I had a larabar. I did eventually get back to sleep. The extra hungriness could be because AF is just about to appear. The bad sleep is probably due to the stress of yesterday. I hope today is a better day. Both the 9yo and nanny agreed to a fresh start today and they will try for a good day. I'm just so disappointed and sad that 9yo chose to behave so badly and on the day of his party. It started because the nanny said he couldn't bring his ipod outside. Instead of being disappointed but saying ok, he faught her on it and it spiraled out of control until his party was cancelled, he lost his ipod and all video games of any kind for a month and spent the afternoon/evening in his room. He agreed that playing with the ipod at that moment was not worth the eventual consequences. I'm just sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 Good for you for making those hard choices. He may not thank you for it now but when he is an adult who can make responsible cause and effect decisions he will. Parenting is hard and I applaud you for not taking the easy route. And great job staying on plan today despite the circumstances! That is the true test of a new lifestyle...how it holds up to stressful/emotional situations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 9, 2013 Author Share Posted August 9, 2013 Thanks, Bethany. It is hard. A for Thursday. I've got a B going for today. I had a scotcheroo for breakfast. I'm kind of ok with that as long as it doesn't lead to more bad eating. I made the bars for my husband to take to a guys get together and was cutting them up and they just looked so good. I followed it up with my cabbage/greens saute and hb eggs so breakfast wasn't only sugar. I have zoodles with tomato sauce, olives and ground beef packed for lunch. And plan on body pump tonight and then a roasted beet salad. So, as long as I don't get sucked into more sugar eating, I'm ok with the scotcheroo. It was WAY better than the cake pop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 10, 2013 Author Share Posted August 10, 2013 F for Friday. I ate three more scotcheroos. And wine. And chocolate. It was a bad sugar filled day. I'm disappointed in myself. It all tasted good and felt worth it at the time. Until it stopped being worth it and was just I already wrecked the day so why not have another one. The resulting guilt isn't worth it. I don't feel the best today, but I also don't feel horrible. No reactions other than an overly full belly. I'm trying very hard not to beat myself up. I'm not ok with this behavior, though. That is the only good thing I got out of the W30 - some sense of control over my eating. I don't want to lose that. I had my normal breakfast and plan to have a normal lunch and normal dinner and no dessert of any kind at all period. I have to admit that I'm tempted to just scrap clean August and stop worrying about it. But I know that will not end well. I'd rather end August with a B than drop the class, to keep with the school analogies. I will work hard, though, to get that average back up. It's still early in the month. I don't have to write it off as a failure yet. One failed test doesn't ruin the whole class, right? Sigh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 No quitting! Getting the B average in the harder class is more rewarding than the A in the easier class. You can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 19, 2013 Author Share Posted August 19, 2013 I'm back from the cabin. It was kind of ugly. I ate too much bread, too much dessert, too much period. I got a cold sore (which I haven't gotten since the beginning of my W30) and a couple pimples. I feel bloated and fear I undid a W30's worth of work weight wise. I know it could have been a lot worse. I tried not to snack/graze. I ate tons of veggies and plenty of healthy fat and protein. But, I started each day with bread (and no veg/protein) and ended each day with dessert and had veggie chips and chocolate covered almonds with lunch. That was enough to make me never feel completely good. I always felt over full and like I could do better. I also ate a lot of corn. Sweet corn is in season and it's so good. I don't think my body is used to wheat, corn and sugar and I don't think it liked it very much. Those things should be once in a while treats not every day for a week staples. My plan to rein it back in is to scrap "Clean August" grading and go for "Clean 2nd half of August." Starting today. I will follow my rules and avoid snacking and desserts and aim for template eating. I will not make any desserts. Even for other people. It's too tempting. I will focus on veggies and clean meals. I will remember to take my enzymes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 19, 2013 Share Posted August 19, 2013 I hope that you still had a fun and enjoyable week even if the food was sub par. You can reign it back in. I'm sure that weight will be gone in no time. Go Jen Go! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 19, 2013 Author Share Posted August 19, 2013 Thanks, Bethany. It was super relaxing. I go to the cabin to cook and clean while the boys fish and play. That leaves me lots of time to take walks and read books. And the food was excellent as in yummy. Just not the best for me, you know? At least not every day for a week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 19, 2013 Share Posted August 19, 2013 Thanks, Bethany. It was super relaxing. I go to the cabin to cook and clean while the boys fish and play. That leaves me lots of time to take walks and read books. And the food was excellent as in yummy. Just not the best for me, you know? At least not every day for a week. Oh I totally know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 20, 2013 Author Share Posted August 20, 2013 B+ for Monday. I swiped a finger of chocolate from my son's dessert. But, then I stopped. Gotta resist that habit. I went to Body Pump and Body Flow at the Y. It felt good to get in a tough workout. I am surprisingly not sore today, but may be tomorrow. Life is getting busy again. We're starting to think about school and have back to school stuff popping up on the calendar. Both kids are starting back up with soccer. Scouts will start soon. Busy busy busy. I need to enjoy ever last lazy day I can. Going to the Y probably doesn't help in that goal. But, it's what I want to do as opposed to what I have to do, so it's all good. I have grease stains on my shirt today. Sigh. I need to remember to wear an apron when I make eggs in the morning. Now I have to walk around work all day with spots on my shirt. Oh well. I stopped at the farmer's market today. My son's reward for good behavior yesterday was purple "green" beans. Funny kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 21, 2013 Author Share Posted August 21, 2013 A for Tuesday. I almost ate a chocolate covered banana for dessert last night. But, I didn't. Yay me. I am very impatient for this weight to go away. I don't think I could have really gained 6 lbs in one week, but it's not leaving! I am trying to be patient and just get back to a place of calm eating and hope the weight comes off. I'm trying not to panic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Great job resisting that dessert. Don't stress about the weight. Take some time away from the scale until you are not stressed about it. Stress does nothing to help. I know you know this but sometimes we have to be reminded anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 21, 2013 Author Share Posted August 21, 2013 You're right - I do know that. And, you're right - I do need a reminder. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 22, 2013 Author Share Posted August 22, 2013 A for Wednesday. I'm still very bloated and puffy. I can barely get my rings on and off and usually they are pretty loose. It is hot and humid this week, so that might be part of it. I suppose I could be also suffering some withdrawal from my off the rails week. I will just keep trying to eat clean and hope I feel less puffy soon. I think reporting my day here helps keep me accountable. Even though nobody but me really cares what I eat. There is some mental thing about having to type it out. Though it was nice to unplug while at the cabin, I think if I'd had interenet access and was reporting each day, I wouldn't have fallen quite so far off the clean eating wagon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 There is definitely something to the accountability of posting here. I'm sure the humidity is doing you no favors. Make sure you stay well hydrated. Hang in there! Great job yesterday! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emma Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 Oh my goodness, you have had quite the week! (I get overwhelmed by all the posts from people and my own lack of time so I only read back a few posts) You had to cancel the party! Wowzers. But good for you on the consistency - it shows that your kid understands and "gets it". My parents once took away Trick-or-Treating from me on Halloween. It made a big impression on me and I knew it was my behavior that caused that to happen. But still - ugh! No fun for you to parent that kind of situation. As for all the sugars and breads - smiling - yep - I know about that - been snacking myself. My stomach feels crazy big and it just makes me want to eat more to somehow get things back to normal (a process that doesn't work at all!). I didn't even think about ending August on a good note. It seems like it's so easy to biff things and then it feels like I've been biffing it for weeks or months, but really it's only been days (granted - two weeks of days - ) I too think the writing keeps me accountable. I wish I was more involved with other's journeys on this process and feel a bit bad that I don't put the time into it. And crazily enough - I find I totally care what you eat! It's fun rooting for you and the other people - kinda helps me stay on track too knowing that others are struggling and moving forward. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 23, 2013 Author Share Posted August 23, 2013 Thanks, E. It helpse to hear from other parents that I'm not an ogre. I'd actually like to do another elimination diet for my son and see if that helps his behavior, but my husband and other son are not willing to do it themselves and it's so hard to make just one kid eat this way. I'm still thinking on it. I wish I'd done it over the summer as it's harder during the school year. But, if I can frame it up as needing to do it for his food allergies, he might not fight me on it as much. I HATE that I want to eat more to make a wonky tummy feel better! Never works for me, either. Thanks for the support! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 23, 2013 Author Share Posted August 23, 2013 A for Thursday. I REALLY wanted dates last night. I remembered that I had them from a long time ago recipe and couldn't stop thinking about them. So, I told myself I could have them for breakfast. And I did. I had 2 dates with almond butter with my eggs and sauteed beet greens. They were lovely. And the good part about that is that, unlike having them for dessert, I am now out of the house and can't be tempted to go back for more and more. So, that is a win. BP tonight. Zumba last night was fun, but it was a sub who used new songs so I had a hard time following along. I don't feel like I get as good of a workout when I'm just trying to figure out the moves. BP is slower, so easier to catch on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emma Posted August 23, 2013 Share Posted August 23, 2013 You passed up dates last night! You are doing some good stuff. I just sneak them whenever I want them and tell them we're not starting Whole30 till Monday. Ugh - Monday and next week is going to test my will power! What is BP? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 24, 2013 Author Share Posted August 24, 2013 BP is Body Pump B for Friday. I had cookies. Warm gooey totally worth it cookies. But, on the good side, I skipped the pizza and wine that were also flowing. So far so good today. I tried Body Step. It was ok. It's always hard to go to a new class and feel uncoordinated. BP and BF are my favorites. Zumba is fun. The rest haven't impressed me too much. I'm still not sure if we're keeping the membership or going back to hot yoga. It's in the high 90's today and all through next weekend, so it's kind of hard to think about hot yoga! My lazy weekends are done. Soccer starts again. I think we had 2 weeks off. Well, I guess it was a month, but it felt shorter. Both kids start this weekend. 9yo today with his first game. 11yo tomorrow with his first practice. Off to the races! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 I'm a dancer and I don't like Body Step because it makes me feel uncoordinated. I used to do Body Combat sometimes but stopped going because it was hard on my feet to do the jumping and marching wasn't getting my heart rate up enough. Do they offer combat at your gym? Great job the past few days! You have been rocking it! Warm gooey totally worth it cookies...omnomnom! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 25, 2013 Author Share Posted August 25, 2013 B for Saturday - I ate some samples at the grocery and too many nuts. A so far for today - determined to keep it that way! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 I had dessert last night - graham crackers with frosting. Why??? I need to do something different. I'm sliding more and more and the weight I gained at the cabin has not budged. It's so frustrating to me that 4 months of good eating only got me 5 lbs lost and one week of badish eating brought it right back. I get that not having much to lose makes losing slower, but seriously! My clothes are tight again and I don't like it. I have to do something. If I keep on doing what I'm doing with more and more "slips" I will not lose the cabin lbs. I don't want to scrap W30 and go back to calorie counting/obsessing. But, I don't want to do another full W30 right now, either. So, my plan is: Starting today W30 at home Do my best when eating out No excuses Sept 1 is a free day (we're going to the State Fair and it's my birthday, I will eat whatever I want) Continue until Sept 26, which is my anniversary Log my meals here for accountability (keeping it here as it's not really a W30) For the W30 at home, I will avoid all non W30 foods. I will eat the template. I will not snack or pick. I will not have any sort of dessert. When eating out or at a friend's house, I'll do the best I can, but do not want to worry about oils, trace sugars, etc. I will skip the desserts, though. May have a glass of wine. I don't eat out often, so I'm not too worried. As long as it doesn't follow me home! It's 1 month (minus 1 day off in the middle). I can do that. I have already done it. Reward at the end is to feel good about myself on my anniversary (i.e. clothes fit!). Wish me luck. Plan for Day 1: M1 - kale salad, hb eggs, sw pot w/ SB, CM coffee M2 - squash soup, chicken sausage, carrots/celery M3 - salmon, cauliflower tabbouleh (sp?), spinach salad Snack - banana w/ AB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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