LadyM's seduction continues (sur son propre velo)

[LadyM]

How is your writing going?

Insightful question. I'm doing so much paid commissioned work that I haven't made much of a dent on my book project. Need a serious reframe. My Wwriting July doesn't at all look the way I had hoped. I'm going back to the drawing board on this and will have a new plan by Monday. Though part of my plan is already to return to the yoga retreat center for a month-long work-exchange writer's residency in October I negotiated with the director. That will be wonderful. And I would like to have a new body of work to bring with me. . . . I do have a deadline with my BFF in SF for a new piece by the end of the week. So, once I finish my review tomorrow and my mounted sheriffs story. . . . or heck, maybe I'll spend the afternoon working on the new piece. Pay yourself first, right? Again, all part of the reframe.

 

Thanks for the nudge, Sara!

[SaraRuns]

Anytime!  Sounds like you are thinking about it and I'm sure you'll get it all done.  But I know how easy it is to let things get away from you, especially when you are busy with other writing.  But it honestly sounds like you are busy with great stuff.

[LadyM]

I am busy with great stuff, AND that makes it extra important to prioritize. Thanks, Sara. So, today begins Writing First. 1000 words, no excuses.

 

Crazy storms took out the power for a stretch over the weekend, but I didn't mind. It was too hot to cook, I don't use AC, and when I got tired of holding a flashlight to read, I went to bed. It was kind of perfect. 

 

I've been riding my bike everywhere. I can't remember the last time I drove my car--maybe to the beach Wednesday? Planning another beach day this Wednesday. And beach day no longer equals ice cream or frozen yogurt treat in my mind. In fact, I'm thinking ice cream is reserved for enjoying with others only. It tastes so much better in good company, anyway, don't you agree?

 

But back to my glorious funky bicycle. I got a new lock since I lost the key to my old one as well as a wicker basket to hang from the handlebars. So, I rode it to the farmers market and managed to bring my haul home divided between my Toto basket and a backpack. And yesterday I rode all the way to a suburban shopping area to return something to TJMaxx and picked up a few things. Very functional, this bicycle. Why aren't we all riding around on bicycles for most things? I also rode over to my reading group Friday night and doing so helped me stick to not drinking wine. I didn't want any, and I brought enough kombucha to share. Worked out great. I did not, however, resist the fancy spread of cheeses, cured meats and grapes. And I may have even had a chocolate covered almond or two. But I enjoyed it and suffered no discernible ill effects.

 

Off roaded last night with popcorn I popped myself in ghee (so delish!) and some local yogurt with my uncle's strawberry rhubarb compote mixed in. Definitely worth it. Otherwise I'm sticking to salads and greens with lean proteins and healthy fats for my meals. I feel like I'm doing fine. Not shifting any weight one way or another, but I'm OK with steadying myself at the moment. I would love to eliminate the subcutaneous fat I have on my belly, but I'm in no rush. FMD speaks of it as my body deciding whether or not it wants to change further as my thyroid continues to strengthen and my body detoxes more the longer I'm off the med; she says I'm doing my part with diet and exercise and the rest is up to my body. Thinking of it that way helps me relax in a way that I think is healthy.

 

In fact, relaxation is something I'm succeeding at cultivating all around. Yesterday I enjoyed the most perfect Sunday morning. Arose quite early and without an alarm, so I put on a dress and my new espadrilles and walked to mass for the first time in a dog's age. Picked up a NYT on my way to a lovely coffee shop where I proceeded to read it, have a terrific coffee, and chat with all kinds of people I don't normally see in that context. Went for a little walk along the river and then picked up a few things at the co-op before heading home. Lovely, lovely.

 

My fun ferments and other kitchen adventures are also keeping me amused. My garlic dill green beans and kohlrabi are pretty wonderful; my kombucha just gets better and better; and I put up my first attempt at kimchi last night. Looking forward to seeing how that turns out. Since all the cabbages are coming into season, I'm going to be making all the sauerkrauts of the world--yeehaw! I also scored two-for-one chicken livers and hearts at the farmers market, so I turned that into pickled hearts and a tasty batch of pate. So much fun!

[SaraRuns]

   

 

Your post just made me smile.  So much good stuff.  There is something about summer, relaxing, biking, and having fun (although I'll skip the biking part ).

 

Hope your 1000 words flowed smoothly!

[pjena]

I'm with Sara - your posts are perfect summer activities.  Love it!

[LadyM]

Haven't updated in a while but all is well. Off roading a bit more than I'm happy with but reining it in. I blame lots of opportunity for fun socializing and not wanting to be a pill. So, there's been drinking maybe once or twice a week, and there was one meal that completely threw caution to the wind and included wine, bread, butter, risotto, goat cheese, flourless chocolate cake and ice cream. It was fancy, it was restaurant week, it was fun in the moment, and I regretted it. Too much all at once leads to a very difficult road back to the path. It was bad. Bad as in I stuck a spoon in the nut butter the next day bad. Can't remember the last time I did that. I don't like myself when I get into that place where I'm possessed by the sugar dragon. But I'm also not going to beat myself up about it. Instead I'll string together a few days of template meals and get back to feeling like my best self.

 

In tandem with the ill advised off roading I have continued to ramp up my activity. It seems I'm good at going overboard in all things all at once. But I'm enjoying it and also keeping up with chiropractic and massage. Feeling tired but strong, and my massage therapist yesterday suggested I take a week off. This was just the permission I needed not to feel guilty when I head East next week for a week at the beach. I do aim to keep up daily walking, but other than that I'm simply going to relax, and do my best to keep damaging eating to a minimum.

 

Writing has been going well. I feel like I have good direction and am balancing the demands of deadline work with the longer-term project better than I have in a while.

 

After barre this morning I'm having breakfast with new friends then heading to the beach just to return home for a dance party tonight. More dancing and poolside Sunday, so Saturday will have to be recovery, writing, domestic goddess time. Life's a beach, isn't it?

[pjena]

It sounds like we're in a similar place.  Reining in ill advised off roading and looking forward to some time relaxing.  Enjoy the beach!

[LadyM]

The tiredness caught up with me. So much drinking and dancing, so much fun, but now I've lost my voice. FMD has me upping a couple supplements and did some work on my thymus, so I'm hoping to be right as rain in a couple days as long as I get plenty of sleep and dial back some of the activity.

 

Flying to Philly Friday, so I'm drawing on all the healing energies of the world to get my body fit for travel. It is so stressful on the body. My goal is to stay regular despite everything, but there's only so much I can do to make that happen. I shall do my best.

 

Two writing deadlines this week and lots of beauty prep, namely appointments for hair, nails, and eyelashes. I learned that my beloved massage therapist does a natural eyelash extension service for a ridiculously small fee, so I'm giving it a shot. She says it actually tends to make people's lashes healthier because they quit wearing mascara. Anyway, I'm giving it a shot.

 

Also hoping to get as much done as possible today so I can take off for the beach Wednesday. It's so hard to stay away for long . . . the big lake beckons me. . . . 

[SaraRuns]

I hope your voice has returned and that your trip to the beach, East Coast style was fab!

 

Off-roading all over the place happened on my vacation, but I'm okay with it.  I got back on track pretty quickly once back to work.

 

Hope all is well!

[LadyM]

Back from vacation and it was marvelous. I love my friends so much and I love getting to spend time enjoying down time together. They're so very generous and it's such a gift to spend time with them in their beautiful and most favorite places. Gorgeous homes, lovely beach, elegant pool and landscaping, vibrant boardwalk, colorful arcades, excellent restaurants.

 

I started the trip with the best writing conference I've ever attended in Lancaster, PA. Really terrific. Made some wonderful connections and learned some practical skills. I also fell in love with Lancaster. Really enjoyed the city and especially their Central Market. I even found a little vegan co-op restaurant that had kombucha on tap. It tasted like vinegar, but still. . . . 

 

Definitely off roaded plenty, though I discovered a plan of attack that works well for me. It hybridizes W30 and The Carbohydrate Addict's diet that I did fifteen years ago. Basically, I eat to template(ish) for M1 and M2 and then add in off-road foods as part of M3. I think I minimized the kind of spiraling out of control that can happen without boundaries at all this way. And since M1 is the toughest when traveling (in my experience), I brought along my grass-fed whey, stick blender, MCT oil, and four-cup plastic measuring cup to make faux lattes in the morning blended with whatever coffee was on hand. This was a much better choice than fruit and yogurt or pastries or cereal. Eating that stuff first thing in the morning sets me off for the day. Then I was able to have a giant salad with tuna and guac for lunches, and I thoroughly enjoyed myself at dinners out. Yes, that meant a cocktail before and an ice cream after eating a meal with plenty of protein and sometimes other ill-advised things. But it worked for me. I felt good about not being such a spaz about eating and gave myself permission to enjoy. It was wonderful. 

 

I brought my travel yoga mat and did a little yoga every morning and every evening. I also walked and swam. Other than that, I let it go. And you know what? I had zero back pain. Hmmmmmmmm.

 

Now I'm home and back to it. Bootcamp last night was tough. Barre this morning followed by yoga and beach time with friends then a show to review. It was wonderful to get away and forget about all the demands on me. Now it's good to be home and back to all the things that I love about my regular life.

[Physibeth]

Sounds like a truly lovely trip! I'm glad you figured out a way to eat on your trip that kept things in balance. So very hard!

[SaraRuns]

Sounds like a wonderful vacation.  And I'm glad you found the vacation balance you've been looking for, what a great feeling.

 

And now back to it.  Hope you are enjoying those beach days.

 

Lancaster is a lovely area.

[LadyM]

Amazing yoga class this morning focused on pitta pacifying. Definitely something this pitta predominant gal needs in the summer. It dawned on me that high pitta season may be part of the reason I've been hungry for sweet tastes. Sweet pacifies pitta. 

 

I've been very focused on yoga lately because I've committed to doing teacher training starting next month and will also begin teaching. Very excited about that, and all the reading and practice i've been doing is already having a positive effect. For example, after yoga this morning I decided not to do bootcamp followed by barre. After my vacation experience away from efforting exercise that resulted in reduced back pain as well as a conversation with FMD I'm deliberately rethinking my level of activity. FMD asked me why I exercise so much and I said that I like it, I like being strong, and it's for weight management. She talked about how as we continue to help my body metabolically I won't need the exercise for weight management as much. This is a good thing, no doubt.

 

Speaking of which, she noted that I look like I've lost more weight, and that surprised me given my daily ice cream habit last week. But I'll take it. I mentioned to her that I feel better the less I eat and asked if that meant anything. She said yes, it means we still have work to do on the thyroid. When our digestion is weak, we tend to reach for foods that are easier to digest, stuff that tastes sweet, for example, and that supporting and building the thyroid will help reduce those cravings and help my body digest the real food that takes more energy to digest, stuff like animal protein and raw veggies. My feeling better eating less food means my body still isn't digesting food as well as we'd like it to. 

 

So, more work to be done. It's all good though. Things are moving in the right direction. I'm needing less magnesium, and my hair is falling out less. (Did I mention that I'd had another bout of hair loss?) I also, apparently, am continuing to lose weight without stressing and efforting so much. 

 

Though I have been excessively hungry in the evening and I need to figure that out. It may simply be that I'm not eating enough earlier in the day. Or it could be that I've had days when I've hardly eaten anything and then it's like my body wants to play catch up the following day.  I'll play with it and try to get myself on a better schedule.

 

In the meantime, back to writing and savoring every moment of summer left. . . . 

[SaraRuns]

I'm excited for your teacher training, that should be fun and challenging.  And I'm glad you are listening to your body in terms of exercise.

 

Enjoy that summer and I hope writing is going well.

[Physibeth]

Yay! Congrats on training! Sounds like you are figuring lots of stuff out! That's awesome!

[LadyM]

Thanks for the support, friends!

 

Man, can you believe we're down to the last weeks of summer? I'm not quite ready to say goodbye, though I am confident that I've truly made the most of it. And I shouldn't speak of it in the past tense. It's still happening. In fact, I'm planning to head to the beach today, tomorrow, and Sunday. Then Thursday as well. Also made it there Wednesday for a nice long walk along the lakeshore after finishing up an interview for a story. Happy, happy.

 

However, I've been working with some annoyances lately. Sleep has been off, and my body feels like it's on fire. Sleep could be because of too much coffee and being overheated. And perhaps too much thyroid supplement from FMD. And feeling like I'm on fire is all about heat--both internal and external. Tis the season. So, I've been working with it ayurvedically to the best of my ability. Drinking aloe and coconut waters, using aloe gel and coconut oil topically, and slowing down to some extent. Reducing fiery activities has also made my back feel a lot better. More walking, barre, yoga and less weightlifting seems to be the right thing for right now. Will try a bootcamp class next week and perhaps increase to twice a week as it cools down and see how my back is doing.

 

Food has been OK. Managed to not eat ice cream for a good stretch of days, so that's something. Still in the bad habit of backloading my meals at the end of the day, so working on eating more in the morning to see how that goes. Also working on going back to one cup of coffee a day instead of two or three. Eating lots of greens per usual and plenty of beet kvass for cooling and liver detox. Also including more dairy than normal. Maybe it's an ice cream substitute, but grassfed whole milk yogurt certainly tastes delicious these days. Thinking of doing a liver cleanse next week to help get more heat out of the body.

 

Anyway, the upshot is I'm quite pleased with my ability to roll with things. So grateful to have the tools to heal myself in big and small ways, and to fully realize that I am, by and large, in control of my experience.

[SaraRuns]

 

Anyway, the upshot is I'm quite pleased with my ability to roll with things. So grateful to have the tools to heal myself in big and small ways, and to fully realize that I am, by and large, in control of my experience.

 

Yay for this!  Sounds like you are doing well, despite the heat - internally and externally.  And I'm definitely jealous of all your beach days, glad you are making the most of it.  My son heads back to school next week, I can't believe it.

[LadyM]

I've been smacked with a "summer" cold, though all of a sudden it's wet, chilly, sweater and jeans weather! (It promises to be beach weather again by Friday, though.)

 

I haven't been back to bootcamp, and I think my body is appreciating the rest. Though I am continuing to walk, barre, and yoga. My body likes these things. 

 

Eating has been up and down. I've gotten into a strange pattern of eating very little one day and then quite a lot the next day. Still not sure what that's about. I'd kind of like to do a W30, but then again, not really. My dad and stepmom are coming to visit next week, and though they're familiar with W30 and have done their own, I don't want to create stress for any of us by not being social and eating out. I might start something after they leave--it coincides with the fist tier of yoga teacher training, so I'd be well supported in self discipline at that point. But then for the month of October I'll be on my writing residency at a ranch where they serve vegetarian meals twice a day. So, I'll simply be joining them in that and supplementing with my clean whey. It will be fine, but impossible to Whole30. They're dedicated vegetarians for moral and ethical reasons, so it would be beyond disrespectful to try to eat meat on the premises. It's pretty much forbidden, and I respect that.

 

OK, so there's all that. But here's the cool part: last night I wore my skinniest Guess skinny jeans that I'd never been able to fit into before (bought them on sale during a trip to Boston years ago with the hopes that I'd one day fit into them, you know how that goes)--and they looked great . . . as in I didn't look or feel like a sausage stuffed into a casing. I felt like a million bucks.

 

And here's the thing: I am, in fact, working less hard at making this body shed weight. This is because of FMD and all the years of W30ing and other work leading up to this and the fact that metabolically my body is finally in a better place than it has been in ages. Knowing all of this allows me to relax in the best possible ways. No more gripping, no more fear that no matter what I do my body won't respond. We're friends now, my body and I, and there's no greater joy than that.

 

Well, maybe I'd feel even more joy if I could kick this head cold. And I will. Hopefully in time to get back to the beach these last few glorious days of summer. . . . 

[SaraRuns]

So excited you are feeling like a million bucks!!!  Maybe that should tell you to keep relaxing and leave W30 on the table for a time when you really need it.  Sounds like you are doing great.

 

Well, except that head cold, hope it goes away quickly!

[LadyM]

Quick check in between events. I'm in the throes of yoga teacher training right now and so far it's wonderful. Terrific group of nine women led by a truly stunning human being with whom I've taken classes and workshops for more than a decade. Learning so much and deepening into myself and a very rich tradition.

 

The visit with my dad and stepmom was good, too, but exhausting in many ways. I think I'm pretty much recovered now, though. Glad I had the yoga training to shift into immediately after their departure. Lots of offroading, but there was only one day during which I felt bloated. Really pleased that I seemed to have figured out how to roll with the punches and return to if not maintain equilibrium as far as eating goes. With training it's quite easy to be back to normal since we start at 8:30, break at noon, restart at 1:30, and end at 5:30 every day except Sunday. So, I'm back to three template meals, saving starches for meal three and eating fruit with meal 2 if I want. No more roller coaster.

 

Yesterday I managed to squeeze in a walk on the beach, a visit to my favorite beach town, and an appearance at the pool with my boys. No drinking because I was driving and had to get to training in the late afternoon, and it was all so very delicious.

 

I just read that summer doesn't officially end until Sept. 23. I'm planning as many beach days as I can as long as the weather holds. And then, of course, summer is a state of mind, no. . . . ?

[SaraRuns]

I'm glad you have found a place of balance, that even when you get a bit out of balance because of *life*, you know how to find your way back to balance, awesome!

 

And glad to hear that your training is going so well and that you are getting so much out of it.  I know I feel like I get a little more out of each practice I go to.  And Double Pigeon has been essential to me with all these long runs (oh, it hurts so good  ).

 

Enjoy summer as long as you can!  Bring on more beach days.

 

Are you able to find some time for writing with your training?

[pjena]

You sound so great!  Your vacations, beach days, visits with friends/family, all of that sounds wonderful.  And that you've been able to relax and enjoy and off-road a bit without negative ramifications is fabulous.  And inspiring.  I need to get myself there.  And I'm so happy to hear that you are doing yoga teacher training and that it's going well! 

[LadyM]

Tier 1 of yoga teacher training finished yesterday. Very powerful week. So much of what we were learning was review for me, but that made it even more meaningful in many ways. And the asana practices! Wow. I'm still processing all of it.

 

I'm delighted that though my muscles are understandably sore from hours and hours of really intense yoga practice this week, my body feels very much in alignment. No SI or other low back junk to report. Very pleased about learning even more about how to take care of this body.

 

Food is good and feels in balance. I seem to have found a kind of equilibrium and I pray that it's not fleeting. I ate out twice last week--once for lunch with the yoga gang for gluten free pizza and I felt terrible afterward so I skipped eating out for lunch after that; and for a lovely dinner at a farm-to-table joint Friday night with a single perfect glass of wine. What else? Oh I offloaded a raspberry rhubarb pie my stepmom left behind on my organic-farm-owning friend who, in exchange, brought me a cooler full of veggies fresh from the earth. Didn't seem quite fair, but we were both happy! I also had bought some locally made salted caramels and they were too delicious to keep to myself so I shared them with the yoga gang. They were most appreciative and so was I to not have the temptation to eat them all myself!

 

I also started my period this past week and it was super easy. Amazing how being balanced in life leads to balanced bodily functions and experiences. What a concept!

 

Balance is starting to mean something different to me. I think I once thought of it as perfection or rigidity, but that's not how I experience it anymore. Balance means participating in my life in a way that supports my highest potential. That means being social, trying things, enjoying opportunities, and making choices that ultimately, always bring me back to the middle way. Not sexy. Nothing to boast about. But quietly feeling very good about it.

 

In addition to the yoga practices, I also managed to go for a couple long walks in the woods, take three barre classes, and teach a yoga class. It's been a good, active yet calm week.

 

And I have about 10 days before I head off into sabbatical land. A week on Lake Superior followed by a month at an ashram with the intention of writingwritingwriting. Really looking forward to this time to focus without distraction and really turn inward. Feels like I'm crossing a great divide in the most positive of ways.

 

I also plan to squeeze in another beach day or two before the autumnal equinox amid cleaning and prepping and packing. . . . 

[SaraRuns]

Congrats on Tier 1 completed!  So glad to read about you doing so well.  And it sounds like lots of good things to come, good for you!

[LadyM]

Saw FMD yesterday and there's continuing work to be done. My hair loss has continued at a pace faster than I'm comfortable with, and so we've upped my iodine supplement in response. The thyroid is ready for more support is what she said.

 

I'm awake in the middle of the night because I just finished my quarterly (or so) liver flush. Yoga in a couple hours anyway, and I really need to clean out my office for my sabbatical replacement who's using it in my absence. So, I'll head there in a bit.

 

I also stepped on the scale for the first time in a dog's age, and . . . funny thing, the number was entirely meaningless to me. I can't remember what it was the last time I weighed, and I have even less idea what I think the number should be. Seriously. This has to be a first, at least since elementary school. The number holds no meaning. Awesome.

 

Since I'm leaving in a week for about six weeks I'm trying to figure out how best to eat down my perishable foods. My first week away I'll need to feed myself, so I may just bring groceries with me. Thinking about how to best nourish myself over the coming weeks given that I won't have as much control over my food as usual--vegetarian kitchen, communal living, etc. My gut game plan is to go with the flow and stay committed to eliminating processed sugars and flours. There also will be no alcohol, and I'm more than good with that. I picked up some whey protein from FMD yesterday, and I plan to supplement with that. Meals will be served at 10 and 6, and I plan to wake at 4 or so every day, so the plan is to follow my morning meditation and yoga with some whey, write until breakfast at 10, which will more often than not be oatmeal, go back to writing until early afternoon, work in the kitchen preparing dinner, dinner, walk, meditation. That's the game plan now, anyway. It could all change, of course, but the anticipation is fun.

 

Yoga and walking will be my movement, and I'm looking forward to the simplicity of that. Simplicity is a good word, actually. I'm looking forward to the peace of surrendering, to not having to make so many decisions every day. With limited food and movement coupled with even greater limited access to media of all kinds, simplicity and peace will no doubt come much more readily.

 

In addition to both literally and figuratively cleaning my house this week I have a massage, a facial, a beach day, a theater review, an ashram visit, barre and yoga classes, and one to teach on tap. Not a bad plan. Not bad at all. . . .