LadyM's seduction continues (sur son propre velo)


LadyM

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Thanks, y'all. I had a fun end to the good day, too, with a marathon texting session with coffee guy. Dating in the digital age, oy vey. But since I'm a writer who thrives communicating through writing, it works for me. Especially since we've also met in person. I've made that mistake with online dating before--getting interested without testing the energy/chemistry. I know that we've got that because that's how this started.

 

Anyway, I digress.

 

Thank y'all for the encouragement. I am feeling good about how things are going. Food and movement feel right, period is in full swing, sleep is good, bowels are good. I even stepped on the scale and am down 4 pounds which shows that it was bloat related and I'm headed in the direction I need to go.

 

I also noticed that I didn't really experience pms cravings this time around. Since I'm taking a magnesium supplement (deficiency is the cause of pms-related chocolate craving) and eating red meat just about every day, my body is getting what it needs. Pretty dang cool.

 

Today my lower back is pretty sore--likely from the massage. BFF/MT is the deepest deep tissue artist I've ever met (and I've known quite a few) and he really went to town. It was needed, and now so is recovery. So, I slept 10 hours last night, am drinking extra water, and will take it easy with exercise today. Good stuff.

 

Looking forward to teaching my last class for a long while this afternoon. I feel myself at a turning point in just about every area of my life. So grateful for the awareness and the shifts!

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LadyM, you are absolutely glowing. I was so happy to read that everything is coming together. I hear you about Internet dating and chemistry. I've had so many fails when email seemed great and then actuality was disappointing,

I spent an hour this afternoon getting a pedi and texting the entire time with newish guy. We're spending Sunday together so that should reveal more. One text was cute... It's a new month, has your diet changed? Nope, same for another month.

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It occurs to me that I have now completed two W30s back to back with a night of off roading in between. That's something, right? Too bad it doesn't feel like much. But that's OK. I'ma just keep going. I like my new template and attitude. And I bought a chicken and a pork shoulder to prepare for this week to shake things up from the ground meat arena for a bit. I also picked up some eggs to make mayo. Testing egg yolks again.

 

Fun yoga class today full of spontaneous dancing. The teacher came up to me afterwards and asked when I started training in ballet--she commented on my alignment and overall dancer look. So lovely to be acknowledged for who we are, no? I am a dancer. Period. And I get crabby when I stray too far from that part of myself.

 

Just had a giant pile of salad greens with a lovely homemade vinaigrette and a can of salmon. Still enjoying eating quite simply with fewer types of foods at each meal. I've stopped tracking and counting but have continued to follow my newly tweaked template.

 

More texting fun with the Monkey Man last night. It's a term of endearment and the given name for my next guy a psychic predicted for me last January. I may be jumping the gun, but he seems to fit the bill. Time will tell.

 

Longing for sweets a bit today. Tempted to add a little stevia to my BP coffee this morning but resisted. Missing my tea with coconut milk following meals today too. But that's OK. It's good to miss things. To touch the edge of one's emptiness. I'm cool with it. Don't need to fill up with sweet food when there's a deeper sweetness in store. I just need patience. All-around patience. I'm up for it.

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Funny how we get cravings out of the blue. Yesterday I was exhausted and wanted a square of dark chocolate. Didn't do it.

I just came home with range free organic blah blah eggs to test yolks. How are you going to cook them?

I love eating simply as well. I filled my cart with cabbage and cauliflower. Will walk past a huge organic farmers market on my way home from pilates this morning and will stop for salad fixings. Lov your template!

Yes! To the deeper sweetness. You go girl. Very perceptive.

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I ate sweet potato last night and it was friggin' delicious. I almost felt bad about it in old dieting mentality fashion, but then thought how healthy it has to be to have some starchy sweet potato cooked in pasteured chicken fat once a week. It's amazing how radically my notion of a "treat" has shifted.

 

Roasted the chicken last night and enjoyed it. I'll save the breast for post wo meals this week. And I WILL be getting in two gym workouts this week. Only one this week, but that's OK. It's all in progress. Doing a Puerto Rican style marinade for the pork shoulder. That should be wonderful for this week.

 

Weight seems to have stabilized at 4.4 pounds down from my high weigh in last week. I'm satisfied with that and feel positive that everything is moving in the right direction again. A friend I hadn't seen in months yesterday told me I looked wonderful, and I'll take it. It wasn't a compliment about weight, I think it was about health and vibrancy. I will definitely be happy about that as a noticeable difference and think of it as a much better way to measure health than weight or size.

 

I think today is for bike riding and maybe going to the beach. It's pretty glorious out there. I know cleaning my house would help declutter my mind a bit. Just finished my BP coffee, so I'll start on the NYTimes and see where it leads. Happy Sunday, all!

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Big day today already. Saw FMD and she worked on the area around my scar quite a bit. There's stuff that needs to be released there. Very interesting. She thinks keeping carbs at 60 a day max is the way to go; she's happy with that and the calorie count. She also talked about how for some people fructose is worse than simple sugars. We think I'm one of those.

 

I also went back to WW. The last time I weighed in was March 4 of this year and my weight was 159.8. I officially started W30 April 7. My WI today was 166.4. My lowest weight was 153 on February 6. Not happy about these numbers though I know they could be worse. Because they have been worse.

 

The good news is I'm not planning anything drastic except to get and stay serious about movement and continuing with my tweaked template. I'm going to continue weighing in. The experiment of letting go of the scale did not work for me. That's not to say I'll weigh in every week forever, but I really need to get a handle on this. I don't feel good at this weight. I will have to work at losing it. But I have the tools and can do it.

 

What's great is that I've really made progress in slaying the sugar dragon and managing my mood, which suggests hormones. This is all loving and supportive. And I'm not beating myself up, disappointed as I am about the numbers. I am not seeing this as a moral failure. This is a first.

 

My throat is sore again, so FMD increased some of my supplements. She talked about down the road doing a more concentrated detox, but my immune system can't handle it right now.

 

Hung out with Monkey Man at his place last night and watched a movie. It was fun. I like him. We're taking it slow. I like that. For now.

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Ha! For real. This is why I've been reduced to eating things like a can of salmon on salad greens with vinaigrette. Or 4 oz of ground beef with cabbage. Two to three ingredients per meal. It'll get old quick, no doubt.

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Not a great night for sleep. The sore throat evolved into a stuffy nose and sneezing. Feels like a little cold. I'm OK with that. I had some initial fear that I was heading down that old interminable road again, but I have more faith that my body can fight this.

 

So I had a hard time falling asleep and then the neighborhood got nuts. Inner city drama, yelling, cops . . . all outside my window. I still managed to get a few zzzzzzzs. And I'm happy to say that despite the truncated sleep I made it to my old 6 a.m. yoga class. I had facebook messaged the teacher last week that I'd be returning this week, so no cold or bad night's sleep would do as an excuse.

 

Wow did I need it. She did the entire class focused on SI stability at my request, and her guidance was all about how intertwined physical, mental and spiritual stability are. Stability, not flexibility, is the goal of yoga. Stability is what serves us the most.

 

It got me thinking about how, indeed, stability is what I'm after. Finally. In all parts of my life. And this is why I'm continuing with W30 despite its derth of magic, at least in terms of weight loss, for me. My moods are much more stable. My body is much more stable. And I believe staying the course will only deepen that stability. Even a slow, drawn-out process of weight loss is itself stabilizing.

 

I'm glad I wrote this down. I know in a few weeks (or days) I'll feel crazy again and need the reminder that this is what it's about.

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I'm so sorry you to the stuffy nose. Kudos on getting to that class.

I like tht you're getting the stability aspect and that you wrote it down as a reminder. My new Pilates reformer class is different than past classes as there is more standing on the machine and balancing while the carriage is moving. I can balance as my legs move the machine side to side, but when facing the mirrors and one leg moves the carriage back while the front leg is stable, I can barely do it.

Interesting, I feel very stable, my artistic over educated son always tells me that he's able to go out on the limb because I'm so stable and a safety net of sorts. My reason for doing Whole Whatever is to learn balance, and whala, these classes are unwittingly about learning balance.

My boss always walks around saying, there are no coincidences!

While some may disagree with Weight Watchers, I'm a big fan. I use it as a tool to be mindful of my weight because it's important to me. Two years ago this week, I made Lifetime at a meeting in Seville Spain. Zach had to translate for me. After losing 105 pounds, I just have to be committed to keeping it off. I've never eaten their products and counted carbs and calories instead of points, but it's kept me on task. I weigh in once a month and go to meetings sone because I have the coolest leader. He always objects the mind/heart/stomach of eating. What I've learned most from him is that every single thing I do is my choice. Also, to have a relationship with the foods I choose to eat.

Be kind to your tired self today!

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Great job going to yoga despite the impending cold and poor sleep.  It sounds like it was just what you needed. 

 

Stable is good.  I think you nailed why I am still doing this, too.  I like feeling stable.  I feel more patient with my kids.  I like not obsessing about food or counting calories.  I am ashamed to admit how many times I have been irritable with my kids or husband and the real reason was that I was mad at myself for eating something I shouldn't.  I feel like I am learning to not let food/weight rule my mood and that is a good thing!

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"I feel like I am learning to not let food/weight rule my mood and that is a good thing!"

 

Yeah, this is it, Jen. I'm with you on regretting all the negative energy emitted on behalf of bad food choices. This is a transformation of an even deeper variety than the shape of one's body.

 

"Two years ago this week, I made Lifetime at a meeting in Seville Spain."

 

Woot! Time to buy yourself a celebratory gift, Calee! I'm not even kidding. This is so wonderful. I'm a little less than 20 pounds from my goal weight. I finally believe I will get there. It helps me to know that you did WW your way--no points, no stupid products. I don't even like going to meetings because there are so few like-minded people there. But there's something really powerful for me about the accountability of weighing in in front of others that I've decided I'm going to continue. Plus, like you, I want to get to Lifetime and stay there while retaining the tools for if and when I need them. Who knows? I might have a baby and need some help taking of post-pregnancy weight. Anyway, thank you for sharing your experience and supporting my decision.

 

Beets, have you been able to make it back to your vinyasa class? I almost forgot how good and necessary the right yoga class can be.

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I haven't made it back. We had some expenses come up and I stupidly forgot to cancel our Y membership, which auto-renewed and sucked down a bunch of $$. So I thought I'd try the Y yoga. But the schedule is trickier.

Maybe this week. I miss it desperately. I know the Y classes are hit or miss but something is better for nothing. Especially something I've already paid for.

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LadyM, I can't believe you actually told me to go buy myself a gift.  You who implied the other day that I've bought myself so many gifts.  You funny woman!

 

I'm buying myself a ticket to Berlin.  How's that?  :)

 

And yes, I totally support whatever path you need/want to take to live happily in your body!

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