slc Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 I visit my family's house quite often but in the first 11 days of my Whole 30 i've tried not to eat there or pick meals that I know are easy to make Whole 30 compliant meals with the ingredients they have (for example eggs cooked in olive oil with veggies). My mom has been great she's even read researched the Whole 30 guidelines to ensure that there a few items at home that she can cook up so I can eat it. Tonight I swung by as a surprise expecting to say a quick hi and leaving before they eat dinner. When I got there my dad was super excited to see me and said he was grilling up steaks. I asked him if there was any seasoning on it and he said "no... just salt and pepper", but I looked closer at the steak and I saw some green flakes and asked him again then he said oh maybe garlic seasoning too". I checked the garlic seasoning and it wasn't compliant it had sugar. After saying that I couldn't eat it, both of my parents trying to be quick thinkers opted to try to wash the steak of it's seasoning so that I could eat it. At the end of the night I told them that I would just take it home and eat it the next day but realistically I probably won't because i'm not sure that washing did anything. I felt really bad about that. I could see how hard they were trying to make it something that I could eat and when I suggested other foods they seemed keen on me having the steak since they bought it and steak is pricier than let's say potatoes. So this leaves me with three things! 1) Have you ever felt really bad for turning down food that wasn't Whole 30 compliant? How did you cope with it, especially with friends/family who you know are trying their best and care for you, but can't help not knowing every ingredient in a certain dish? 2) Does it bother you that when you ask people for ingredients or ask about marinade or seasoning that sometimes they brush it off saying it's okay you can eat, rather than listing out the ingredients? And later you find out it's not compliant? (I sometimes feel like a broken record when I repeatedly ask my mom are you sure what you made didn't include a can of tomatoes that had sugar in it?) 3) In this case the steak was marinated and there was sugar on it. It wasn't cooked yet so the seasoning was on the outside of the steak. Would running it under water to "wash it" take off enough of the sugar to allow it to be compliant? Could I have eaten the steak? Or would running it under the water just embed it deeper into the meat? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators SugarcubeOD Posted July 17, 2015 Moderators Share Posted July 17, 2015 In answer to your questions... 1) I can't really say I 'feel bad' when turning down food because it's me that has to live with the consequences of ingesting the off plan ingredients. Your family wants you to be healthy and they're clearly supportive so it may just take more time. Yes, they're trying their best, which is fantastic and more than what a lot of people experience but in the end, their support needs to go all the way. In your case I would have said thank you so much but no thank you, I just dropped by for a quick hi and that they can enjoy the extra steak the next day for dinner. 2) Yes, it drives me nuts, but it generally drives me nuts when I ask a question and get a vague response. If the question is 'whats in it', the only appropriate answer is a list of ingredients and then I get to be the judge of whether it's okay for me to eat. Broken record away darling, it's your responsiblity to ensure you're staying compliant... just make sure you're nice and friendly about it so it doesn't come across as judgemental (speaaking from experience) 3) I'd say that if the steak was not cooked and they washed it, it probably would have been fine to eat and if I'm honest, I would have probably eaten it. I don't think washing steak would embed seasoning into the meat, but really it comes down to you and your whole30 and you're clearly very committed to getting the best out of the experience so I'd say your first gut feeling of not eating it would be the one to go with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsStick Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 The new W30 rules relaxed the 'sugar in your salt' rule, so I would personally choose to count this situation as the same. Did you know that all iodized table salt contains sugar? Sugar (often in the form of dextrose) is chemically essential to keep the potassium iodide from oxidizing and being lost. Because all restaurant and pre-packaged foods contain salt, we’re making salt an exception to our “no added sugar” rule. - See more at: http://whole30.com/whole30-program-rules/#sthash.Rk5Km5jF.dpuf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jent103 Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 I so know this feeling - you are not alone! It's awesome that your family is trying to be helpful. If I'm going to someone's house, I often just tell people not to worry about me and I'll bring my own dinner (or whatever). Eventually you develop enough of a reputation to where they kind of expect it. In your specific situation, I probably would have just said "no thanks, y'all keep the leftovers for tomorrow, I have food at home," or if the only thing that made it noncompliant was the sugar and I actually wanted it, I might have eaten it after they washed it. That's because sugar is noncompliant but isn't a gut disruptor like soy or grains or dairy would be, so it doesn't have as much potential to physically mess you up like those things do. It does bother me when people brush off things like added sugar, but it sounds like your family has good intentions in general. In those cases I try to stick to my guns nicely while having some grace for them. To a lot of people, "I'm not eating sugar" means "I'm not eating dessert," or "I'm not eating white sugar but honey is natural so it's fine." It can be a tough mindset to crack. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannlib Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 The new W30 rules relaxed the 'sugar in your salt' rule, so I would personally choose to count this situation as the same. I'm afraid that eating a commercial garlic seasoning with added sugar listed clearly on the ingredients list is absolutely not the same as eating iodised table salt. The OP was correct, the addition of this seasoning made the steaks non compliant. I'm afraid I never eat food prepared outside my own home when on w30 (control issues, me?!). I go for a firm I'm sorry I've eaten or I'm sorry I've a meal waiting at home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slc Posted July 20, 2015 Author Share Posted July 20, 2015 Thank you all for your help! After that incident I had to go to a birthday bbq and I stayed firm with Whole 30 and asking about ingredients. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WholeMama623 Posted July 21, 2015 Share Posted July 21, 2015 I have Celiac and my family has never really understood all it entails... about 25 days into my Whole100 we had a cookout for Memorial day. A family member showed up with hummus, gluten free crackers, and other things JUST FOR ME. I felt terrible, but told her that I wouldn't be able to eat them now or in the next 80 odd days. It was very thoughtful because normally there is NOTHING for me to eat at these things. She looked a little confused/upset? but she also follows me on facebook where I post a good deal about my Whole100. She didn't push it after that, and I made sure to apologize (not sure why..) I did feel bad, but so glad that I didn't throw away 25 days because I was too afraid to say no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators ladyshanny Posted July 21, 2015 Administrators Share Posted July 21, 2015 I have Celiac and my family has never really understood all it entails... about 25 days into my Whole100 we had a cookout for Memorial day. A family member showed up with hummus, gluten free crackers, and other things JUST FOR ME. I felt terrible, but told her that I wouldn't be able to eat them now or in the next 80 odd days. It was very thoughtful because normally there is NOTHING for me to eat at these things. She looked a little confused/upset? but she also follows me on facebook where I post a good deal about my Whole100. She didn't push it after that, and I made sure to apologize (not sure why..) I did feel bad, but so glad that I didn't throw away 25 days because I was too afraid to say no. This happens at any family function that my husband's family throws or comes to. Gluten free pasta salad, just for me. Or at Christmas, gluten free gravy mix (gag), just for me. Rice flour bread, just for me. I always feel horrible about it and try to explain but it never quite translates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeadowLily Posted July 21, 2015 Share Posted July 21, 2015 This happens at any family function that my husband's family throws or comes to. Gluten free pasta salad, just for me. Or at Christmas, gluten free gravy mix (gag), just for me. Rice flour bread, just for me. I always feel horrible about it and try to explain but it never quite translates. That is so sweet. Just love the smithereens and stuffing out of them. Hugs and kisses all around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Britishgal Posted July 21, 2015 Share Posted July 21, 2015 My best friend bought gluten free bread for me when my son and I were at hers last week...it made me smile at the thought but I couldn't eat it. I kept looking at it sitting in the middle of the table as I ate my homemade soup. Luckily the kids all ate it! I'd feel really bad in anyone else's house but hers is one of the few places I can say no to food without being glared at... It was nice to be somewhere where no one questioned what I was doing food wise though...she and her husband never undermine my efforts at all ( though I'm not sure they quite get the no grains bit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsStick Posted July 22, 2015 Share Posted July 22, 2015 That's my mother. The last time I visited she was super excited she'd found all these gluten-free products at her grocery store (which she'd sworn up and down had NO gluten-free stuff and, after finding out I *had* to be GF she was very unhappy about). The GF hamburger buns were dense and dry...choking me even though I'd smothered them in sloppy joe meat to hide their rock-like nature. Chex cereal (which I sometimes have at home) and "look! the coleslaw dressing I use is gluten free!" and just...made me want to hide my head in the sand. Hubby and I both got so fed up with it all we started making dinner for everyone whenever she was at work, roasting veggies and making chicken instead of her Pinterest weird recipes (no, mother the dump cake/cobbler out of cake mix with a can of soda just...no, or how to combine these three super processed mixes into whatever other thing...). Neither hubby or I liked her tuna salad anymore (I once liked it, but not then) because it was super soupy with Miracle Whip and sweet because of too much sweet relish. Yeah, nope. Homemade dill pickle relish and homemade thick mayo and maybe a boiled egg or three? Yes. Not that stuff. Ick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WholeMama623 Posted July 22, 2015 Share Posted July 22, 2015 Yeah.. most of the time Gluten Free does not translate to "healthy" or "healthier" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeadowLily Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 2) Does it bother you that when you ask people for ingredients or ask about marinade or seasoning that sometimes they brush it off saying it's okay you can eat, rather than listing out the ingredients? And later you find out it's not compliant? (I sometimes feel like a broken record when I repeatedly ask my mom are you sure what you made didn't include a can of tomatoes that had sugar in it?) I've been thinking about Melissa's post for a few days since reading your questions. Before we get too deep into this #julywhole30, here's some sage advice from Whole30 co-creator Melissa Hartwig:"I'm seeing a theme right now on #Whole30 social media, so let's talk about the difference between being attentive-slash-dedicated to the Whole30 rules and boarding a bus to Crazytown. Read your labels. Every label. If you don't know what something is (like "natural flavors"), look it up for your own benefit. This is encouraged. It's a good habit to get into, knowing what's in your food and drink, and on the Whole30, it's essential for making sure you're not accidentally consuming something that could break your "reset." However, you won't always know where ingredients come from, and when it comes to research, sometimes you have to just say enough is enough. Did your waiter say there is no sugar in the sauce? Cool. Please don't head back into the kitchen to interrogate the chef. Did a crouton from the neighboring salad bar tray ever fall into the kale you're about to eat? Please tell me this is not something you would actually consider as a non-celiac. Do labels fail to specify exactly where their "natural flavors" come from? They're not off-limits on the Whole30, so call it good and enjoy. You COULD abstain from anything you aren't 100% certain about, but are you getting a little too pickypants here? You could skip the kale or the sauce just to be safe (that waiter did look a little shady), but I'm calling that taking your #Whole30 into obsessive territory. And start looking up any ingredient and you'll find a reason not to eat it; spinach contains toxic mineral-stealing oxalates, "natural flavors" could be derived from the anus of a beaver, and ingesting citric acid can tie up your fate profit strings. (Only one of those statements is false. Probably.) My point is this: there's a fine line between attentiveness and crazytown. At some point, you just have accept that you are staying compliant with the rules, make the decision to eat the thing, and move the heck on. Let's keep it in perspective, people... if natural flavors is the worst thing in your diet, you're doing okay." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mason Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 I am just starting out with the Whole 30 and am glad I stumbled up on this post. I want to be dedicated to the program and think I will be because I want to find out for myself if my digestive issues will be alleviated, if I'll have more energy and if my cravings will subside. But I also don't want to become neurotic and obsessive about food choices because that seems both unhealthy and unsustainable. Would love to hear any other thoughts on this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators SugarcubeOD Posted January 26, 2016 Moderators Share Posted January 26, 2016 I am just starting out with the Whole 30 and am glad I stumbled up on this post. I want to be dedicated to the program and think I will be because I want to find out for myself if my digestive issues will be alleviated, if I'll have more energy and if my cravings will subside. But I also don't want to become neurotic and obsessive about food choices because that seems both unhealthy and unsustainable. Would love to hear any other thoughts on this. 30 days isn't going to make you neurotic and obsessive about food choices. It's a 30 day reset in which you remove a defined grouping of food and then come back to it with information and re-introduce the items you want to consume again. You DO have to be diligent for those 30 days but proper diligence is sustainable for 30 days without becoming neurotic... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carlaccini Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 Hi Mason! Think of it this way - you have the right to feel optimal. Eating whole 30 style whether it be for 30 or longer - gives you the opportunity to learn how you feel on high octane fuel rather than on sub optimal fuel. For instance I will absolutely under no circumstances will I consume dairy - I pay for it in so many ways. It takes 2 weeks for dairy to get out of my system. With our group of family friends I very often get - well it has only a little bit, or I put less cheese in it for you so you could eat it. No I don't eat it and I won't eat it. These people are not in my body and cannot make judgement on how I feel in it. I am not making a judgement on them (if that is how they take it - that is THEIR problem - not mine) I am making judgement on how X food will make me feel. I don't think this makes me neurotic - I think this process has just made me super aware on what certain foods do to me. (I had many health issues to solve) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praxisproject Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 A lot of people find keeping a log helpful, not just for food, but also exercise and how you're feeling. The program is only for 30 days, so it doesn't need to be sustainable beyond that, but it's not a program where you can have cheat days, as the point is to let your gut heal for 30 days, so you can feel reintroductions properly. For anyone with disordered eating in their background, I highly recommend reading these posts: http://whole30.com/2014/06/dear-melissa-eating-disorders/ http://whole30.com/2012/02/whole30-gone-bad/ Whole30 is a great program, but sometimes the issues we have to navigate are bigger, family, work, medical issues. For me, Whole30 changed my life, I found out I have a serious problem with gluten and a number of health conditions are now gone, since cutting out gluten from my life. I can't imagine how sick I might be right now if I'd never found this program. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mason Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 Great information, thank you all so much! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.