missmary Posted August 16, 2014 Author Share Posted August 16, 2014 ah well, a whole18 it was. I'm going to stop logging for a while. I think I have a routine that is working well (more protein in the morning, lunch-time salads with fish, a little more starchy veg, no mid-morning or mid-afternoon banana, no mayo ), it just kind of feeling a bit arbitrary to call it whole30 when really it is me figuring out what works for long term when I'm NOT doing a whole30. Not too much fall-out from the drinks: less than stellar workout in the morning (not terrible), sniffly sneezy during the day, and then, since I had told my co-worker that I broke my whole30, another cocktail arrived at my desk at 5pm (Friday in-office happy hour tradition, it's usually just beer, so easy for me to drink my water). I had some. It was gin and rose lemonade with sparkling water and it was sweet but tasty. I didn't really want it...but...I had a little. I suggested other people try it too and eventually it was consumed and life went on. Haircut today (finally!) and several workouts and the office and there you go. OH! and question: do any of you see an issues with 5 servings of salmon a week...? I'm liking that so much better than the tuna. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted August 16, 2014 Share Posted August 16, 2014 Well done Mary! It's great to find a place where you can sit comfortably isn't it. On the fish question - I don't really see a problem with it. Salmon is safer than tuna from a mercury stand point isn't it? I've found I enjoy it much more than tuna as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators LadyM Posted August 16, 2014 Moderators Share Posted August 16, 2014 Ditto what Bethany said about salmon, and sooner or later you'll tire of it day after day anyway and then change your routine, right? Maybe in the fall. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted September 1, 2014 Author Share Posted September 1, 2014 well, here I am, continuing along. Hosted two friends from undergrad with their husbands and one set of kids on Saturday, and it was so lovely. All but two of the seven were vegetarian, so I grilled potatoes and pineapple and asparagus and made a tossed salad with arugula and red onion and the grilled pineapple and avocado and had grilled shrimp on the side. Peach crumble with coconut milk ice cream and hard cider were the only non-compliant items. It was good. I've stubbornly avoided the office all weekend (despite a deadline this coming Friday...) instead embarking on an organizing and home-repair frenzy: fridge and freezer, cleaned and sorted; guest bedroom/storage room, ditto; dresser drawers, linen closet, kitchen junk drawer...got them too; dropped off my guitar for repairs (cracked tuner) AND fixed the leaky side of the kitchen sink. I can't explain it, but I guess I should just enjoy it while it lasts. Breakfasts and lunches for the week are all prepped and into the fridge, now to spackle the hole in my bedroom wall and secure the loose toilet roll holder in the bathroom. happy labor day friends. Oh and if you were worried: workouts have occurred like clockwork per usual. Max has somehow unlocked side crow for me. I don't know what it is, but whatever I ask him to help me with somehow magically becomes possible. love it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted September 26, 2014 Author Share Posted September 26, 2014 Here I am. Sorry to show up only when needing a little support but stuff is really hitting me this morning. It's like everything goes along fine and then a couple little things are just too much. Stupid things. work stress. a package shipped via the wrong carrier...no big deal kind of stuff. I guess maybe it was just an illusion when I thought I was doing ok with all of it: what's happened in the last month or two: my dad in the hospital with mysterious low blood pressure, hobbling around and falling over so they wouldn't let him out (he was MAD, first at my mom for taking him in, then for having to stay day after day when he failed their "walk two steps" test). He's home now. Then my poor lyme disease mom was having a little post-menopausal bleeding and, after three doctors all say "it's probably nothing but we should just test xyz" it turns out she has cancer in the lining of her uterus. More specialists. probably a hysterectomy coming in the next week or two. So I'm doing my workouts and eating my food and I'm just feeling lonely and alone and wishing I had somebody to listen or whatever--how's that for a dating website blurb? desperate, sad person seeks...what exactly? I admit, it's not very alluring. Tomorrow I will see Max and try to care about back bending or form or movement quality (we are trying again, since last weekend we just talked for 60 minutes and didn't do a single exercise so he didn't charge me. he is a sweetheart, that guy). So yeah. no amount of lamb liver in the world will fix how I'm feeling right now. I do know how to take care of myself though. and other people, and I will do it. Always moving forward, never backwards. over and out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derek` Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 Mary, sorry to hear that you have so much going on. Parents' health problems are never a fun thing to deal with. You'll get through things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators LadyM Posted September 26, 2014 Moderators Share Posted September 26, 2014 Sending big virtual hugs, Mary! xoxoxoxo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjena Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 I'm sorry about your parents' health issues of late. That is hard. Enjoy the beautiful weekend, breathe in the sunshine, and take care of yourself! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 I'm sorry you are feeling lonely and sad. We are all here for you though I know it isn't the same as IRL people. Prayers for your parents. Virtual hugs for you. You are strong and I know you will bounce back. Keep being the awesome person you are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted September 26, 2014 Author Share Posted September 26, 2014 Thanks everyone. I'm struggling, but I'm ok. I do know I have IRL people and wonderful web people and I'm super lucky and blessed, actually...it will get better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted October 13, 2014 Author Share Posted October 13, 2014 Have I mentioned lately that I love you guys? I'm doing ok. Saturday, my parents came for lunch. They arrived 20 minutes early, and since i have a non-working doorbell, spent the 20 minutes listening to cello practice standing in the yard. We had cold roasted salmon over baby greens, steamed green beans, black olives, grape tomatoes, new potatoes, dijon vinaigrette. Flourless chocolate torte with raspberries for dessert (Mom's birthday is Tuesday...). I sent them home with bone broth (carefully seasoned and with veggies added for the last 6 hours so it would be delicious plain), and blackberry kombucha and they left. 24 hours of liquids only and Mom is having surgery this morning. The didn't want me to be at the hospital with them when she went in--didn't want to make it a big deal. At 11am, I am permitted to go meet Dad in the waiting room. In the meantime? I've been experimenting with doing body-weight workouts at home, trying to find the right spot and setup, so I'll do that. I'll hang out on the forums a little bit. I'll eat a healthy breakfast. I'll try not to worry. Best case this is 5 laparoscopic incisions/6 weeks recovery. no big deal, really. She cleared her schedule; no court dates (she is a volunteer guardian ad litem), no funeral duties at the church, no "faithfully fit" classes, no choir. Dad has promised to care for her to the best of his ability (the food won't be as good as yours, he says, but I'll get her fed). She is going to be all right. so am I. We won't talk about the worst case, at least not for now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators LadyM Posted October 13, 2014 Moderators Share Posted October 13, 2014 Sounds like an excellent plan. Hang in there! xo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Sounds like you had a nice evening with them and have a great plan in place. Keep busy and don't let the mind wander. *big virtual hugs* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted October 14, 2014 Author Share Posted October 14, 2014 long day. lots of waiting but she came through the surgery pretty well. -turns out it will be a few days before we get definitive labs. more waiting, but mostly good news so far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted October 14, 2014 Share Posted October 14, 2014 Yay for mostly good news! Boo for more waiting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nadia B Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 Waiting is nerve racking but is way easier when you have plan A/B/C and probably even D. They are lucky to have your care and expertise. Hoping for the best outcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted October 16, 2014 Author Share Posted October 16, 2014 Thanks everyone. I know Nadia knows this feeling very well, probably better than I do. Waiting wasn't fun, but tonight we have results. Great results! The cancer was limited to a 1" tumor in the uterine lining, rated stage "1a". It had not breached the uterine wall. It was not in the lymph nodes. They are confident that it was removed completely and suddenly I seem to be able to eat (which I haven't been doing much) and I think I may be able to sleep tonight (which I haven't been doing at all) and I can feel a heavy weight lifting. It's such good news. Thanks for your support as I've been dealing with this. I'm feeling blessed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Woo hoo! Great news! Now enjoy your food and rest! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators LadyM Posted October 16, 2014 Moderators Share Posted October 16, 2014 Wonderful news! Hooray! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 well, here I am. My mom is doing great. I'm doing a little less great. Something is up that is making me need 12 hours of sleep a night, naps both weekend days, cold, can't get warm, gaining a little weight (which isn't that big of a deal except clothes not fitting is no bueno). yeah. Weirdly my workouts are fantastic, and work is going pretty well (good concentration for 8-10 hours). I have enough energy to keep my food stuff in order too, it's just that afterwards I'm tanked! Crawling into bed at 7pm last night instead of going to a party with friends is a major bummer. I guess what I can't figure out is if something is off in my hormones or hemoglobin or whatever (lab appointment Monday should help figure that out) or if my activity level is just too much in the context of the rest of my life. Do I have to give up or slow down some of the activities I love just to be able to have enough energy left over to socialize (and as an introvert, socializing is majorly draining. it takes a lot to make that energy up)? Gah. I don't have any answers, really, but somehow sometimes it helps to write this stuff out. I was inspired by you ladies to try out a real ballet class yesterday morning (not the Techno Blasting Barre/Tracy Anderson method they teach at my gym--no offense for those that may love that sort of thing, but it wasn't my fave). This was Ballet with a live piano player, crystal chandeliers, everyone in black leotards and pink ballet slippers. It was fun. and I was pretty good at it. There was a woman there that I know from the gymnastics gym and she was all "Oh, this is why you haven't been tumbling lately, you've been doing ballet!" um no, this was my first day but I have been working hard on the mobility and strength and balance that I needed to do well here. I dunno. Based on the stuff mentioned above, I think it might be healthier to NOT start going to Ballet twice a week. It might be healthier to do Capoeira only twice and not five times. It might be better to sleep in one or two days per week instead of lifting heavy 5-6 times. That maybe I should be happy my gym changed my favorite hot vinyasa class so I can only do it once instead of twice every week. Why is it so hard to just slow down? I'm not-so-secretly hoping my labs reveal low iron or thyroid or dhea so I can supplement more and keep driving just as hard as I want to, but, now, writing this, I'm not so sure if it isn't my expectations that are out of balance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Physibeth Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 All hard things to balance. I understand the not wanting to slow down especially from a context of my getting paid for most of my activity. Whatever the labs reveal I hope it gives you answers and things to try. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators LadyM Posted January 18, 2015 Moderators Share Posted January 18, 2015 Holy crap you do a lot, lady! Sounds like you've pretty much got this figured out. It is winter, after all--a natural time to slow down a bit. And slowing down a little doesn't necessarily mean forever. Our bodies are always in flux, like it or not. What's wonderful, though, is that you're so attuned and responsive to yours. Also, an aside: the barre class I take is not a techno-blasting one, thank God. For me it's like ballet except without turnout, which I can no longer do safely because of my SI. I'm thrilled that you gave ballet a shot! For me, these kinds of exercises are intense but not draining the way lifting can be. Not that I don't love lifting, but it's something I have to be especially careful not to overdo. Two to three times a week, max, for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators LadyM Posted January 18, 2015 Moderators Share Posted January 18, 2015 Ooh, another thought, from someone with first-hand experience of the incomparable stress of having a sick mama, could it be that your body is cycling out of crisis mode with regards to your mom? (So glad to hear she's doing well, btw!) That, I've come to understand, is the way I function: excellent in a crisis but I fall apart afterward. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmary Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 Thanks ladies. There is an element of truth in all of it, I suspect, particularly that last thought, LadyM, as my Mom doing well does allow me to relax/collapse a little and I may just be recovering from that adventure. AND I remembered I've been traveling a bit for work (not long trips but two days out of a week with a night in a hotel three times since Christmas). That stuff is exhausting. There was a time in my life when I would have thought nothing of laying around all weekend with a good book. That is so not my MO anymore, but perhaps I need a little of that in my life too. Balance and all. I'll keep working on it. Meanwhile, those pink ballet slippers will get plenty of use, as I fully intend to wear them around the office. the leotard too (topped with a cardigan and a little skirt of course, so as not to shock anyone). I'm so glad you found a place with a sort of Barre that you enjoy, LadyM, and that you get PAID to do activity you love Bethany even if that makes it harder, sometimes, to take a break when you need one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nadia B Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 Hmm sounds so familiar...when the joy of being able to do things silences the reason. You know there is a big chance you will benefit from slowing down but you don't want to. Choice between two undesirable options of slowing down or giving it up for way longer sucks. What if you do a deload week as a project vs scaling back here and there. What do I know about it anyways, I am a restless monkey Live piano is everything, right? I believe it is a meditation more than workout. Love that you love it. J once asked me why am I wearing a swimsuit in the winter after I pulled off the described look. Hugs and all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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